iFreddie Benson
by bobkitty1123
Summary: Freddie gives his account of the last few years doing iCarly with Sam and Freddie, and how he and his relationship with a certain someone has changed. -SEDDIE-
1. iMeet Carly

**A/N** – Includes real events from iCarly but with my own twists and changes. Please enjoy. All happens from the perspective of one Fredward Benson and will stay that way all throughout. I don't know how much of this I'll actually write but I'll start from the beginning and try to catch up to the present. Disclaimer: I am not Dan Schneider therefore I do not own.

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><p>I was always that kid that sat in the back of the classroom and didn't really talk. Everyone thought I was too much of a geek and it didn't really help that I pretty smart. Yet, all that changed when Casey Newman moved to town. She was an attractive blond with a gap in her front teeth where she lost a molar to a bike accident. In spite of her rough and tumble attitude, she took a liking to me.<p>

Like a mother bear, she protected me though it wasn't always appreciated that she hurt others with her fists for me, as my dad had told me that violence was wrong, but for some reason I let it go with her. Then it didn't matter what Casey or my dad did because they both left. Casey left for some reform school in New York City and my dad…well, I don't really know where he went. I was only five and my life already seemed to be going down the tubes.

To add insult to injury, my mother lost her job and I came down with a variety of childhood illnesses. I'm talking massive ear infections, a slue of pinkeye breakouts, stomach bugs, colds and the flu once or twice. We always made fun of Germy, er Jeremy on iCarly but at one time I was worse than that poor boy. All that, on top of chronic asthma, put me in a weakened state, and caused my mother and I to spend years, moving from hospital to hospital. It also didn't help that since my mom didn't have a job, we had no health insurance and could never afford much treatment. We just couldn't catch a break.

Finally, we boarded a plane and flew from Arkansas to Seattle, Washington. I didn't like the large city at first as we moved in Bushwell Plaza but my mother got a job at the hospital there and with the health insurance, I improved greatly. Turned out that all I really needed were some antibiotics and an inhaler—I actually outgrew my asthma that same year but it was nice to have anyway. Things really were looking up, but I was still bedridden for at least a year, and my mother homeschooled me for that time.

Then, one day, a few weeks after we managed to get the last of a terrible cold out of my system, my mom went out to the story and I got to meet the most fantastic girl. I didn't even know for about a year, a short, preppy brunette lived across the hall with her eccentric brother. It was like being in a desert, dying, and not knowing there was water just over the next sand dune.

My mom told me not to leave the apartment and while I was always a well-behave kid, I left the second after she did. And I just ran. I ran to the elevator and rode it to the lobby, got yelled at Lewbert and ran back upstairs. I went out on a fire escape and vowed to come back every so often as I got a great view of the city. Then I ran down the hallway back to my apartment but right outside the door I collided with the corner of a box, and started to bleed.

"Sorry, kiddo." The man said, putting the box down hastily and peering at my head with a grimace. We stood right in front of my apartment and the Shay's. He motioned to his door. "If you'll come in, I can clean you and bandage that."

My mom always said that: "If you trust a stranger, you open yourself up to danger" but Spencer seemed odd, not harmful so I nodded and followed him into his apartment. He told me that his name was Spencer Shay and explained that he was an artist. I looked around his apartment with wonder as he put peroxide on my cut—it wasn't as clean as my house and I kind of liked it.

"I'm Freddie Benson." I offered my hand to shake as he offered me some blue tea. "I live right across the hall.

"Oh…Ms. Benson is your mom?" He asked kindly but I could hear the tone in his voice. Now I knew where I had heard about him before—my mom talked sometimes about how some people shouldn't allow to raise children and Spencer was constantly named. "She comes by often to check up on me and Carly," The resentment was clear in his voice.

"Is Carly your wife?" I smiled, but Spencer starting laughing. After having only my mom as company for so long, I thought he was laughing _at_ me but after a moment I realized that wasn't the case and joined in.

"No, Freddie, she is my younger sister. In fact, she is just about your age." He said, smiling brightly. "And right now, she is…at school. Why aren't you in school?"

"I'm homeschooled but I'll be starting Ridgeway next fall."

"That is where Carly will be going." Spencer said, leaning on the counter and watching me for a moment. Just then I heard the door open and I turned to see a pretty brunette walk into the room. She had wide brown eyes, and wore a green skirt with a white blouse. Casey had been pretty but not in comparison to Carly. I returned the faint smile on her lips. "Speak of the devil," Spencer said with a smirk as he stepped forward to hug the girl.

"I'm not a devil, Spence." Carly leaned out of the hug and peered around Spencer at me. "Who's this?"

"This is Freddie, Ms. Benson's son." Spencer said, pushing Carly close to me. All I could hear was the blood pounding in my ears but even so I saw the grimace pass over Carly's face—she probably didn't like my mom and I was afraid that she would not like me as well.

So I threw in, "Yeah, and my mom is crazy." Everyone, including me, laughed. It felt good but kind of like I was betraying my own mother. I brushed it off as Carly looked at me with a small smile on her pale, pink lips.

"Hey, Freddie, want to watch some TV? I've got Girly Cow season 1 on DVD." Carly asked. "And stay for some spaghetti tacos?" She said, hopefully with a glance at Spencer.

"Of course, Freddie, you can stay." Spencer said as I was steered to the couch by the brunette. She was smaller than me but she was just as strong—you know, because I sick and all. And as she sat close to me, her leg touching mine causing heat to rush into my cheeks, I forgot all about my mother.

We were about an hour into our little marathon when someone started beating on the front door as if they attempted to tear it down. I heard a muffled shout but I didn't hear what the person yelled. Spencer looked confused as he crossed to the door. He glanced at Carly, "Sam?"

"I don't think so. You know Sam just walked in from day one." Carly said, looking just as lost as her brother.

"Who's Sam?" I interjected. Was this another friend? _Friend._ Did that really mean I had a friend already? And as I glanced at Carly, I was sure of it. She was so nice and sweet that I knew that we could really become close.

"Oh, just my friend but I'd watch out if I were you, Sam Is kind of abrasive. We meet when Sam tried to steal my tuna fish sandwich and I retaliated." Carly said with a distant smile. I suddenly resented this Sam fellow—he sounded mean but Carly seemed rather fond of him. Another reason to dislike him. "And once-."

"Fredward Benson!" My mother screamed from the doorway and approached me like a hawk descending on its prey. "I told you to stay in _our_ apartment, and oh god, what happened to your forehead! I knew this would happen if I didn't make you wear that helmet. I just can't believe that this could have-."

"Ms. Benson, it's my fault." Spencer suddenly interrupted to stand up for me. "I asked him over for some TV and spaghetti tacos. How could the poor boy resist? It was a chance to get out for once. And the cut was an accident but it is all cleaned up. No harm, no foul. Can Freddie stay? I already started dinner and well, it'd be rude to make him leave now."

My mother looked contemplated telling Spencer off but I saw her give in. "Well…I suppose." Then she turned to me. "Okay, you can stay for dinner but you are in trouble when you get home, young man." With that she turned and stormed out.

"Thanks, guys."

"That's what friends are for." Carly and Spencer said in unison before yelling, "Jinx", and bursting into laughter. I joined in with a great big smile on my face. It was a nice day.

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><p><strong>AN** – Chapter 2 is up now. Go and read! :)


	2. iMeet Sam

**A/N – **I was originally going to put the tale of Freddie's first meeting with Sam in with the first chapter but this one was too long. Kudos if you read. Enjoy and review, please. Disclaimer: I am not Dan Schneider and therefore, I do not own.

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><p>Carly and I had been friends around two months now that school was out for the summer. Everyday I would cross the hall to see her but sometimes I would find only Spencer who would tell me that Carly was out with Sam again. I was curious about this mysterious friend. I mean, when I usually hung with Carly it was to watch TV, as that was a commodity that my house was lacking, and so we rarely chatted. Sometimes I heard about how Sam beat up some kid or something but that was always in passing.<p>

That was why I confused when I went over to Carly's that day. Spencer had given me a key so I could escape my mother when necessary but that day when I opened the door, I found Carly and Spencer missing. They must have gone out. I didn't hesitate to help myself to a pepi-cola in the fridge though. I was becoming closer and closer to the odd family, and that wasn't such a terrible thing.

I sat on the couch and started watching some sports. I hated sports but any show was still TV, and it was just so fascinating to be able to watch the world from the couch, this very comfy couch. I smiled faintly as I pulled the tab of the soda. Suddenly I was coated in soda. It was in my nose, and my hair. In my attempts to spare my eyes any further spraying, I flung the can away from me.

"Ow, watch it!" I heard a girl's voice snap and when I turned, I saw a girl even prettier than Carly. However, this girl was the spitting image of my friend Casey, if you added four years to my old best friend and added some femininity. This girl had light blond hair that fell down past her shoulders and a sharply angular face. Piercing blue eyes glared at me. I smiled at her but she didn't return it.

"Who the hell are you?" She snapped, crossing the room and hoisting me up by my collar. My feet were a good foot off the ground. "This is _not_ your house."

"It's not yours either." I bit back, mocking her tone almost perfectly, and so she dropped me. My feet shot out from underneath me but it didn't hurt physically. Instead it hurt inside my chest somewhere. "Who are you?"

"None of your beeswax, nub." She hissed, disappearing into the kitchen as I hauled myself to my feet. She was in the refrigerator. When she turned back around, she was holding a piece of bacon in her teeth and after violently tearing a bite off asked, "Who are you?"

"Fredward Benson." I said slowly, moving to the island where the computer sat. I looked at the girl wearily. Then she burst out laughing. It wasn't like Carly or Spencer… they laughed because they enjoyed it but this girl laughed because she wanted me to feel hurt. I didn't really like her.

"Did you mother hate you?"

"_NO!"_ I yelped, glaring at her. How dare she! I didn't say anything for a moment. Then, "Who are you?"

"Sam R. Puckett." She spit in her palm and offered me her hand to shake as if I would actually fall for that. I ignored her hand and just stared at her. I had always thought Sam was a boy. This girl couldn't be the same who bit off part of a kid's ear once because the kid took her pudding cup… Yet, as I watched her wipe her salvia-coated hand on her pants, it wasn't entirely farfetched.

"Sam? Carly's friend, Sam?" I sputtered. "You're a girl?"

"Well, duh," She grinned, punching me hard in the arm. I grimaced but said nothing. "Do I look like a guy?"

"The way Carly talked about you… I mean that with your attitude… It only would make sense if you were…" I was struggling with the revelation, but all doubt left my mind as Sam stepped close to me with menace in her eyes. Of course she was a girl but what could make a girl so… vicious?

"Listen, I never have been, am not, and _never_ will be a guy. Got it?" She leered at me, threatening me to call her a guy again. I nodded vigorously. "You better watch it, Benson." My scalp prickled but I wasn't sure if it was because of the threat or because she already gave me a nickname. Let's just say that I was so sheltered that even her aggression seemed alluring—years later, though, it still would be.

"Watch what? You say that like I should be afraid of you." I told her and I saw her features contort. "You're just a girl anyway." That was just really dumb on my part because next thing I knew I was on the ground being pummeled by a angry Sam Puckett. Eventually she stopped and plopped down on my chest, constricting my breath in my chest.

"Get off me, fatso." I snapped and shoved her off me.

"I'd rather be fat than a nerd." She spit back.

"I'm _not_ a nerd."

"Then, what is your favorite Galaxy wars character?"

"Nug Nug, but liking Galaxy Wars doesn't make you a nerd," I told her matter-of-factly.

"Thinking that liking Galaxy Wars _doesn't _make you a nerd, makes you a nerd." Sam threw her head back and started laughing hysterically. I just rolled my eyes at the fiery, blond-headed demon. Eventually her laugher tapered off and we moved to the couch. I sat on one end and she was at the other. We didn't talk and soon my mind wandered back to Carly. "What are you looking all dreamy about, Benson?"

"Not you," I said automatically and absently.

"Watch it," Sam hissed.

"There it is again… you keep telling me to watch myself but you don't realize that you don't scare me _at all_."

"Then you are an idiot." She leaned across the couch until she just a foot away and she had that murderous look in her eyes. "At least more so than I originally thought." She scoffed. "I could pulverize you, Fredbag." _Fredbag?_

"Then do it." I said, defiantly. Suddenly she was rising over me and pulling me from the couch by my collar. She let me go and raised her arm as if to hit me but she hesitated and we stood there as if suspended in time.

An internal struggle flickered across her face, and I closed my eyes not to see her retaliation. Then I felt lightening bolts shooting through me. My whole body went rigid with shock—Sam was kissing me. I never kissed a girl before and I didn't know what to do. If I pulled away though, she would hurt me. So instead, I took a risk and deepened the kiss, my fingers tangling in her hair. I felt her tongue flick across my lower lip.

Finally we broke apart, her expression incomprehensible. I could feel red rising in my cheeks but my face was twisted in a grimace—did this mean she liked me? "Um, Sam… I…" I began.

"You like Carly." She finished for me and I gaped at her. "How did I know?" She asked my unanswered question. "Everyone prefers Carly over me." She said and for a moment I felt a twinge of guilt but I couldn't deny that I did like Carly more. Though that kiss with Sam was… amazing, but what would I know? I never kissed a girl before.

The blond raised me as if she was going fling me to the ground but before she did, the front door flew open and Carly walked in with her brow furrowed. Her eyes shot from Sam to me in her grasp and back to Sam. "SAM! Don't hurt, Freddie." Carly cried but it was too late. Sam already flung me to the ground and my head cracked against the ground painfully. Above me I could hear Carly chewing out Sam.

"He bothered me." I heard Sam mutter. I squeezed my eyes shut as I threatened to black out and as I did that, I felt Sam kneel down besides me. "Fredweird, are you okay?" Her voice was soft as she propped my head up with her hands.

"I'll get some ice." Carly said and I heard her footsteps retreating. I opened my eyes slightly and I saw Sam hovering above me. She looked angry, not concerned like her voice portrayed.

She leaned in close and pressed her lips to mine for a moment, a very brief moment. "If you tell _anyone_ about this, I will make you wish you were dead…or I might just kill you."

That was the last thing I heard before I blacked out. Unlike the day I met Carly, that day wasn't so nice.

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><p><strong>AN - **Aww, poor Freddie but, like Sam, I can't help but torture that boy.


	3. iCarly

**A/N –** Wow, I am just powering through these chapters but I have a long ways to go. I don't know when I'll get the chance to write and post the next chapter but you should expect it by Wednesday. Disclaimer: I do not own.

**Edit - **I made some changes to some parts since I rushed off the computer before I could change them, so don't be surprised if you re-read and a couple parts changed. Nothing truly noticeable or plot changing at all.

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><p>After that strange meeting with that crazy blond girl, I was more leery of her. I didn't push her again in fear of her retaliation… or her kisses. I realized after that, that there were worst things she could do to me than hurt me physically, so I just backed off. And she never brought up the kiss again. In fact, if not for that kiss, I would think she hated me—well, actually by that time I was sure I had imagined it all, and she did hate me. Either way, she acted like she did and I believed it.<p>

I saw her more after that too. She over Carly's house just about _all_ the time but I no longer felt jealous of the blond now that I knew she was a girl. Maybe that made it worse though. She was beating me up all day long but was still somewhat attractive. Sam wasn't nice like Carly…I really liked Carly.

That was why when Carly got in trouble for posting pictures around the school of Ms. Briggs head on a hippo—which Sam did, of course, but Carly took the blame for—and was sentenced to filming the school talent show, I caved and did for her. She pulled that "_for me_" and even with how irritating it was, I still did it.

I got a ride with Spencer and Carly to the auditions, and as I was setting up, the last person I wanted to see was Samantha Puckett…and yet there she was. She walked in, with a hoagie in one hand and her cellphone in the other. "Hey, you invited the doof." Sam laughed raucously as she walked to where Carly stood on stage.

"Sam…" Carly open her mouth to defend me, ever-sweet Carly…

"Aw, man! I didn't know _that_ was going to be here!" I yelled in retaliation as Sam stuck her tongue out at me and started walking over towards me.

"_She._ I am a she, Freddie, as in 'girl'." She snapped, leaning close to me. For a moment I thought she would kiss me again but then I heard her say, "Unless you kissed a guy?" She smirked and gave me a wink before taking a seat nearby in the audience with her feet propped up. I watched her for a moment as she took a huge bite of her hoagie.

The whole time I was setting up, Sam wouldn't stop ragging on me because of my crush on Carly. "She will never love you, Freddie." Sam had stood to hiss the words in my ear, her breath reminding me faintly of our kiss but as soon as the thought surfaced, I forced it back as if I feared she would hear the intrusive thought. "I don't see why you try."

"I don't see why _you_ try." I said, dryly as I finished attaching the camera to the tripod. I turned to her, crossing my hands over my chest. She did the same.

"Try what, Benson?" The threat in her tone was evident.

"I don't know… _pretend_ you hate me?" I offered and spun on heel to return to my camera. As I looked away I could see Sam's lip curl and her eye twitch. I was really getting to her, so I decided not to talk her for a bit because I didn't want to rile her up. If she kissed or killed me here... well, either way, that wasn't the best idea.

"Hey, Freddie, are you ready to start?" Carly yelled from behind the curtain. She peeked out at me. Any doubts that I had about doing this were extinguished. Her smile seemed to radiate warmth and I just bluntly nodded at her with a goofy grin on my face.

Sam was there again to squash me like a bug but this time not with her words or her fists. As Carly disappeared behind the curtain, Sam came up behind me. "Never love you…" She intoned, and then _grabbed my butt._ I spun to look at her in shock. "Now, tech-monkey, why don't you click on your pretty little camera and film like little Ms. Perfect asked."

I watched her walk away—she walked like a guy, and she smelled of Axe. Yet, something made me want her. I shook my head and clicked on my camera. I LIKED Carly, and I wasn't going to go after some cruel, moody jerk who was probably just playing me anyway. She didn't want anything but to watch me squirm—_some girls just want to see the world burn. _

"5… 4… 3…" I began counting as Sam and Carly came down to stand with me. The curtains swung open to reveal a small girl, stretching her tiny arms to play the instrument. She smiled at us, pushed her glasses up her nose and was posed ready to play when directed. "2… And we're on."

"Lame." Sam scoffed and I thought it was directed at the girl on stage who had just started playing her cello but instead I found her eyes fixed on _me._ I frowned at her and she stuck out her tongue. I would have returned the favor. Then I realized I wasn't filming the girl anymore but somewhere on the red curtain behind her. I returned the camera to where it had been. Just as the girl finished, I heard Sam say loudly, "Lame."

"Sam…" Carly began but trailed off as a kid appeared on stage that looked like Ms. Briggs. She let a giggle out. "Sam, look! He looks like Ms. Briggs" Carly hissed pointing at the kid. I looked through the camera, and the kid seriously looked like our bitter teacher. I, myself, stifled a laugh.

"Yeah, but this kid doesn't have Ms. Briggs pointy tits." Sam snorted.

"You could poke an eye with those things." Carly smirked and ducked her head with embarrassment. She mimed jabbing herself in the eye.

Then Sam grabbed a few stray cups and held them to her chest and Carly burst out laughing. Soon my camera drifted from the poor boy on stage _trying _to do his interpretive dance and came to rest on Sam and Carly goofing off. It was hilarious! Then I realized that I had hardly filmed the show and redirected the camera.

Soon it was all over and I just glad. It was painful, some of the acts. A few were really cool like one kid who could squirt milk out his eye after snorting it up his nose, and this one girl could burp Twinkle-Twinkle Little Star. I was grateful to go home now, and sleep maybe.

"Hey, Freddie, can you edit this stuff for us…me?" Carly asked, her big brown eyes staring in my own. I wanted to say no but it would be rude, first off, and secondly, I didn't want to do anything to make her _not_ like me. But why did I have to do it?

"Yeah…sure," I muttered dejectedly, ignoring Sam from where she stood behind Carly making kissy faces at me. I picked up my camera and walked out without really talking to either girl. I liked Carly, don't get me wrong there, but she just wanted me to do _everything._ I mean, I know it was really supposed to be Sam's punishment but if Carly was going to take the blame for the crime, she should really do the time.

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><p>As soon as I got home I grabbed my laptop and began cutting out all the parts where I had strayed. I stuck all those clips in a separate folder. They were <em>too<em> funny just to delete. Maybe I'd put them on a disc and give them to Carly as a gift…or would that be too forward? Maybe I could… I cut the thoughts out. While I couldn't get Carly's soft smell of mangos and cucumbers out of my mind, Sam words rattled in my brain. _"She'll never love you, Fredwart."_

I tried to focus on the editing and was almost done. Finally, I sat back from the computer, proud of my editing. The transitions were smooth, the angles were well laid out and the audio was great. Maybe I had a future in this stuff. I was in the AV club but that didn't mean I ever considered being a cameraman, or maybe a director. I smiled to myself as I uploaded the video. It was done quicker than I expected for such a large file but I shrugged—better for me anyway.

Later that night I sat on my own couch for once, instead of the Shay's, and watched Girly Cow. It was the same two episodes I watched with Carly that first time I met her. It brought back memories but also dredged up the memory of my first meeting with Sam. I grimaced and changed the channel…to sports. That wasn't much better so I watched some Spanish soap opera.

Just then I heard a scream and someone…or something, slammed into the front door. It looked ready to buckle when the door swung open. Standing in the doorway was Samantha Puckett, her brow furrowed in fury. She rushed in. "Sam!" I screamed, warningly. She ignored me and hauled me up by my belt-loops. And don't think she missed the chance to grope me again.

She dragged me into the other room where Carly was sitting, looking distressed, at the computer. I noticed Splash Face was open and the video I posted was up. It was playing silently and I realized with horror that I posted the wrong video. "See that, Benson?" Sam screamed in my face and for once I wasn't attracted to her. In fact, I was terrified. "You're an idiot."

Carly just sat so still and petite that I felt my heart thump with my love for her. Sometimes she got a bit out of hand but mostly she was calm, nice, and rational… Not to mention beautiful. I shoved that thought out of my head…or should I say that Sam shoved it out of my mind. She swung hard and smacked me across the face while screaming that I was such an idiot.

"Take it down, Freddie." Carly said, probably realizing that I hadn't meant for this to happen.

"Okay, Okay," I said hopping on the computer and starting to try to take it down. Then I saw the notice. "I can't take it down until tomorrow." I said slowly, expecting Sam to hurt me again but both Carly and Sam were silent. "I'm so sorry, guys. On the bright side, we got a lot of views."

"A lot of them probably being Ms. Briggs and Mr. Howard. Principle Franklin will have us in detention until next year." Sam hissed.

"You'd be in detention anyway, Sam." And instead of hitting me, she nodded. "And anyway, it was _really_ funny."

"Yeah… we are funny, aren't we?" Carly smirked joyously. It made me happy to see her like that. "Maybe we should a webcast. Like once a week or something, and entertain people." She said suddenly.

"Really?" Sam and I said in unison but we didn't yell, "jinx" but just glared at one another. "That is a really cool idea, Shay," Sam smiled and patted Carly on the back. I had to admit, I understood Sam's sentiment completely.

"Yeah and we could call it… iCarly." I offered, and I wasn't sure why the name popped in my head but it sounded cool. I saw Sam smile out of the corner of my eye and Carly was beaming. "And I could be your tech-guy."

"Yeah, and the important people, me and Carly, will be the stars…on camera." Sam countered and I stuck my tongue out at her. Carly said nothing, she was still reveling in her iCarly dreams.

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><p>The next morning the video came down but Ms. Briggs had already seen it. She told Sam and Carly because of that, none of the cool talents would get to be in the show. I had frowned at the news—Ms. Briggs was one sour, old hag. Carly then came up with the brilliant idea of showing all the denied talents on iCarly. Sam and I agreed it was a good idea—even though it hurt to agree with that…beast.<p>

I made some flyers, and the girls hung them up around the school. We decided every Tuesday around six o'clock. Everyone was soon buzzing with the news. Everyone hated Ms. Briggs and most had seen our previous video (which Sam and Carly insisted later that I put back up). A few girls even come up to me to ask me about it, but I didn't think about them; only Carly.

"Freddork." Sam said as we stood in the studio that evening. "Carly wanted me to ask our _tech-stooge _to hurry it up." She snapped and yawned as if it were all so boring to her.

"She did not call me a _tech-stooge_."

"How do you know?" Sam asked, spinning on her heel and returning to where all the talents were waiting. "Just be ready in five."

I finished calibrating the camera and had it live streaming to a random URL. I figured if this show went well, I could later transfer the video to our own iCarly website. That'd be nice. Then Carly would have to notice me even more so than she does now because we'd be thrust constantly into close proximity. I tried to forget that Sam would be there.

"Are you ready guys?" I heard their muffled replies. "Okay, on the count of 5." I paused. "5…4…3…2…" I silently said the one in my hand as the show started. I had counted down loud enough for Sam and Carly to hear and sure as I reached one they popped out, smiling and doing some funny, cute little dance.

"I'm Sam."

"I'm Carly"

"AND WELCOME TO iCARLY!" They announced together. It was really rather cute and quirky. I smiled at them.

"So tonight-" Carly began.

"Because of our nasty teacher," Sam interjected.

"-We will be showcasing some amazing talents that our classmates possess!"

"Yes, bring on those freaks and weirdos!" Sam said, throwing her arms wide as if she was the ringmaster of her own freak show—correction: she _was._

"Okay, this first kid we're going to show you can take a glass of milk-"

"This is so deliciously gross." Sam interjected once more, bringing a smile to my face but it was quickly gone again

"-Snort the milk up into his nose-" Carly continued.

"It's the best thing ever!" Once again, Sam brought a smile to my face.

"-And make the milk squirt out of his eye!" Carly sang as the boy came out and started to do his trick. I watched with amusement and disgust. Carly held the same expression as I and Sam looked merely excited.

As the milk sprayed all over the floor—_gross_—Sam looked straight at the camera…actually straight at me and said, "I wanna _marry _this boy."

Anyone watching the web show would assume she was talking about milk-boy but her expression and her eyes were directed right at me. I moved the camera to follow milk-boy as he walked out and Sam, off-camera, winked at me briefly. Maybe I imagined it.

Samantha Puckett was one of three things: in love with me, messing with me or just plain crazy. Or maybe she was a bit of all three. I ignored her the rest of the show, even when she tried to catch my eye. Instead I watched Carly with her sweet gentle moments, and I knew it bothered Sam.

After the show, and as Carly was escorting all the kids out of the apartment, Sam and I were alone. She strutted up to me, like a peacock towards a potential mate, and smiled. "She'll never love you." She sang and leaned in to kiss me. I took a step back but she was on me in an instant.

Her fingers caught in the rough fabric of my polo and it was the same as last time…I gave in but the kiss was only a few moments. And yet it felt the same as any other kiss we had with the lightning running down my spine. _Ugh. _This girl was going to give me a complex.

As I went to my prospective apartment, I fell on my bed trying to sort through all the girl drama in my head. Carly was so sweet, beautiful and innocent. We could last a long time. Then there was Sam: rude yet beautiful and with kisses that left me breathless. I sighed heavily and fell into a fitful sleep.

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><p><strong>AN - **I should have another chapter up by wednesday. :) R&R


	4. iDream of Sam

**A/N** – Another warped and twisted chapter from me. Muahaha. Welcome to my iCarly alternate universe where each day brings a new advance from Sam on a certain nerd and weird thoughts from said nerd. XD Read and review, guys. Disclaimer: DO NOT OWN. D:

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><p>After that first iCarly webcast and my second (third?) kiss with Sam, we needed to come up with more ideas for what to do in the next show. We had to have one planned and set for next Tuesday. And while Sam was reluctant—and too lazy—to do anything to help, Carly and I came up with a list of things, though very short:<p>

1. Introduce Spencer and some of his sculptures

2. Blindfold Spencer and make him eat gross mixes of food

3. Have Sam beat a watermelon with a baseball bat

Yeah, that was it…pathetic but maybe if _Sam_ would quit being _Sam_, this would go better but of course, I would never get that wish. Sam would always be tough, meat-loving, crazy, and lazy Sam Puckett. I had groaned at her and rolled my eyes when she told us all our ideas were stupid.

I was still contemplating things to do Monday morning come Ms. Briggs class—yeah we didn't exactly leave ourselves _a lot_ of time to do this. Maybe this week we could skip but when I suggested it to Carly, she got upset and I dropped it. She said we had loyal fans now and we'd have to keep our promises. I didn't mention how we made no promises and that we couldn't have loyal fans yet but she fluttered her eyelashes at me and I agreed—I am a weak, weak man.

I walked into class and said hello to Carly who smiled at me. As I said, "Hey, Sam." The blond just looked at me, took another spoonful of her cereal and said, "I'm eating." I didn't even get a hello. I got kisses, punches and wink but a simple hello was merely out of the question. I rolled my eyes.

Just then Briggs came in and said something about smelling bacon. I turned around to look at Sam who was smirking and holding a piece of turkey bacon in her hand. I tried not to smile at her. Briggs gave both girls an evil look as Carly tried to explain it was turkey bacon and then Ms. Briggs yelled at them to put it away.

I heard the crashing sound of a plastic plate, bowl and cup falling. There was no crash when the dishes hit the floor, no, instead they were caught by my backpack. Oh joyous for me—now my bag would smell like bacon and sour milk. I turned and rolled my eyes at Sam. "In my backpack?" Sam just glared at me.

I turned my attention to the front of the class as Ms. Briggs introduced a tall man in a kilt. I hadn't heard the rest of her introduction but I caught something about Scotland and dancing. I dreaded the worst. Then the man started dancing. Then I heard a distinct "BOOOO!" from behind me. Everyone joined in, even me. This guy, while probably good at what he did, was not what I wanted to seeing or hearing right now…or ever for that matter.

Ms. Briggs didn't hesitate to give Sam detention when she pinpointed that Sam had started the booing. As the man started dancing again, I turned to Sam and hissed, "Can't you keep out of trouble for five minutes?" She looked at me incredulously as if I said something rude or shocking. It _was_ no secret or surprise that she got in trouble all the time.

"Well, I only do it because I want attention." She crooned softly before she grabbed the turkey bacon out of _my_ backpack and gave a piece to Carly. At least they had something to keep their mind off the god-awful performance. My mind though was stuck on Sam's words. Was she for once just being brutally honest or was she messing with me again—I decided on the latter.

Overall it was a long day with Ms. Briggs assigning a huge essay on Scotland dances and Mr. Howard assigning _way _too much homework. It was as if the two collaborated and built their assignments around one another's to make sure we got the most homework possible. Now Freddie Benson is not daunted by any amount of homework but with iCarly now, it just was unwanted. I blame Sam for my change in character. And I was hardly surprised when I was glad that the school day was over. Once again I blamed Sam.

I went straight home after school, utterly drained but looking forward to seem Carly...and unfortunately Sam. Well, actually I had to make a detour first. I had to stop at K-mart and _get a new backpack_—thanks to that blond demon, my entire backpack and most of my assignments, tests and my calculator were ruined. At least my cell phone had been in my pocket.

As I walked in the apartment after the girls and their story about Sam's smelly mom, I told Sam how I had to buy a new backpack. She just gave me an enduring look and simply stated, "You're just lucky I didn't dumped it down your pants." But she finished her comment with a wink and turned back to Carly.

"That was terrible," Carly commented, referring to the Scottish dancing that Ms. Briggs subjected us to. That was one thing we could all agree on. "Why do we even have to put up with stuff like that?" She grumbled a moment under her breath before, "Anyone want some iced tea?"

"Sure," Sam and I said in unison and glared at one another. We _had_ to stop doing that. Carly asked Sam to get some glasses while she got the tea. Sam also grabbed some straws but only two: one for her, and one for Carly. The list was only growing. Now she would give me kisses, punches, wink but no hello's and no straw. I just frowned at her.

"I can't believe Ms. Briggs made us watch that." Sam grumbled.

"Yeah, how is that _art_." I said, but then again I remembered Spencer's art. While there was no doubt in my mind that it was art, many people would disagree—art was clearly subjective but that didn't mean that Ms. Briggs had to force her crappy art on us, her poor helpless students. "I can't stand her."

"Well, at least you don't have to sit with her in detention." Sam chided. _Oh Sam. _At that same moment Carly, politely, passed Sam her tea with a lemon slice on the side. "See that," Sam marveled. "Carly puts a lemon slice in her tea."

"I'm not surprised. Carly's classy." I replied, reaching over for my own glass, also sporting a lemon slice, which was quickly gone and stuck on Sam's glass with her other slice. Carly didn't seem to, or chose to notice Sam's theft. Yet, that only reinforced my point. Carly was too nice to point out to Sam to behave and Sam was too rude to behave—it was as simple and as aggravating as that.

"And I'm not?" Sam asked skeptically. What did she want me to say? Yes? Sam was just about as classy as gum stuck to the bottom of a park bench.

"This coming from the girl who not only dumped her breakfast in my backpack but also cleans her ears with her cell phone antenna." I scoffed and stifled a laugh. Sam shot me a dark look but that launched me into a laughing attack.

She shut me up quickly though, she just smiled and said, and "It wasn't my cell phone, it was yours." Sam pulled something from her pocket and scooted my phone across the table. I grimaced. Ears, belly buttons and a few _other_ places were the dirtiest places on the body and now my phone had earwax on it. I grumbled and started wiping at it, for once, hoping I had my mom's disinfecting wipes.

"Ew, Sam." Carly smirked and Sam smiled at Carly. We all fell into silence as we sipped our tea slowly. "Hey, guys, what if we show cool dance clips on iCarly. If you hurry Freddie, you can send out a post about it and people can send in their own zany, awesome dance moves. Our favorites can be showed on the show tomorrow night." Carly smiled and I smiled back. This was the second time in a row where she came up with a great idea: first the web show and now this. That brunette beauty was on a roll.

"That sounds cool," I replied and moved to the computer so I could send out the announcement. We had received so many views I had bought the URL. We now owned and now we had traffic daily but mostly from kids we knew but with this, I had a feeling we would pull in some new viewers.

"You know what doesn't sound cool?" Sam said suddenly, blowing bubbles in her tea. It was kind of adorable. Sometimes she was just like a little kid—one that could really pack a wallop.

"What?" I said as I finished the post. I hit 'enter' and it was done. Soon we'd have videos flooding in. And even if we got one or two, at least we'd have something to show.

"You." Sam replied subtly. It took a moment to sink and I groaned. How had I fallen for that one? It was so obvious.

"Sam, be nice." Carly said quietly, looking between the two of us wearily.

"I'll be nice, Carls, but I can't promise I won't bite." As she said those words my fingers instinctively clutched my neck. I couldn't imagine her teeth there—then the kiss entered my mind and I could. I quickly cleared my thoughts. Was Sam really turning me on for a second there? I frowned and look at the brunette, remember her sweet voice and her kindness.

Then Sam cut into my daydream. "Guys, we already have 200 video submissions for the dance…thingy." Sam said with clear surprise in her voice. I didn't know you could surprise a Puckett. "And it's going up still."

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><p>THREE THOUSAND SUBMISSIONS! It had been four hours and the submissions kept coming. I guess people just can't wait to display their talent (or non-talent) to the world. Sam kept reading off the rising numbers every ten minutes or so. Finally Carly asked the question, "What are we going to do?"<p>

"I guess we'll just watch them all and decided as a group which ones stay and which ones go." I answered and I could see in the other two's faces that this wasn't how we expected to spend out night. "If we watch them all briefly and make out decisions quick we should be able to cut through a good majority tonight and if we don't get to them all…" Carly looked sad at my next words. "Well, too bad then."

"That's right, Fredbag. Screw all those other nubs! Mama only wants to see the best." Sam said loudly, punching me in the arm in the midst of her excitement, though I wasn't exactly sure of her excitement's source.

"Ready to watch some videos guys?" I announced loudly, trying to sound cheerful. Sam and Carly only groaned because that is exactly what we did for six hours straight.

Spencer stopped by at one point to offer us food but we waved him away, even Sam said no. Our eyes were glued to the computer screen, watching person after person does flips or breakdance or even river dance. Many we just clicked off after the first few seconds and a few more we watched all the way through. I soon felt my eyes burn from the light from the screen in the dark of the living room.

I looked to my left where Sam sat but she wasn't able to look back…she was asleep. Her head rested against my shoulder and her left hand was resting on my thigh. On her other side was Carly whose head rested on Sam. It was all rather sweet and I felt no guilt as I fell asleep myself.

When I awoke again I was no longer at Carly's apartment but I was at Ridgeway. This jerk was all over Carly and she kept pushing him away but the jerk wasn't taking no for an answer. I felt chivalrous as I stepped in between him and Carly. I felt the brunette grip my arm as I stood up to the bully. Next thing I knew I was dancing.

I can't really explain it. One moment I was in control of the moment and the next one I was having some dance-off with this jerk. I mean, I was winning as I was a much better dancer (of course) but I wasn't sure how one thing led to another. And then the whole time Carly stood off to the side but suddenly she jumped into the dance and I spun her around. She was so small and petite in my hands and I wanted to kiss her and as I leaned in, she became heavier. My eyes shot open

Then I wasn't holding Carly anymore. As I lowered the girl to the ground and she fell in step with me, it was Sam Puckett who was snapping her fingers along with me at the jerk. I spun in place, my feet just carrying me any which way. When I looked back, Carly was smiling at me again, and I smiled back.

"Catch me." She shouted and I knew we were reaching the finale of our little number so I stood and steeled myself for Carly's weight and so it came as a huge surprise when I was catching Sam. I caught her though, nearly flawlessly. That was the moment that my brain registered that this was a dream. Normally I would have fallen over and been crushed under the Puckett.

"Looks like I win." I said confidently though the words weren't my own. My voice was my own but someone else was talking. "Now scram." I spun to where Carly stood again, small and smiley.

I grabbed her up in a huge hug and pressed my lips to hers. I deepened the kiss, running my fingers through her hair but suddenly I felt her hair give. And I was holding her hair which appeared to be nothing more than a wig. I looked down and found Sam looking up at me. I stared at her with confused horror but something washed over me, and I bent my head to hers and our lips met for the fourth time…but this didn't count. It was only a dream.

But as I sat up with a shock and look at Sam's sleeping form, I thought: It _was_ just a dream, right? Well, of course, it was but were those feelings more than the fantasies of a teenage boy?

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><p><strong>AN** – Before you review, remember that this follows the iCarly plotlines but doesn't stick to it with complete conformity. I know parts are off but I made it that way purposely. Plus, I did add in some actual quotes from the show. :P So now, please go and review!


	5. iThink Sam is Beautiful

**A/N** – Another chapter for you guys. :) Also, I was also asked by _mhristheword097_ if I would be going through _all_ iCarly episodes. The answer is no because there are way too many episodes and I will only use the ones that I can thread some Seddie through. And remember that I am taking my own artistic license when it comes to these episodes anyway. Disclaimer: I don't claim or own iCarly.

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><p>Carly and I walked into her apartment after school. It was the Thursday after we aired all the dance moves on iCarly and it was a hit. We decided to get a jump on planning next week's web show to avoid the same thing next week. Sam wasn't coming though. She just snorted at us when we asked her come and work with us on it. "We shouldn't have called it work," Carly said with a smirk.<p>

"That girl is a scientific anomaly, I tell you. I can't imagine some who is so lazy and eats so much is so skinny." I laughed and Carly joined in.

"You want to know something…something you cannot repeat _ever_." Carly said with a sly smile. I felt my heart thump in my chest as I hastily nodded. She motioned me closer and her breath tickled my cheek. "Sam gained six pounds and now she thinks she is getting fat." Carly looked at me as if this was the greatest secret ever. Girls gained a few pounds and complained about their weight all the time—not that new or different.

"Well, not to be rude, but maybe she is…" I replied, keeping my voice low as if Sam might overhead me and kill me. Knowing that girl she'll just magically know what I said and KILL me. I just hoped Carly wouldn't relay this conversation to the blond.

"FREDDIE!" Carly cried out loud, her tone incredulous.

"What? I didn't say it made her any less beautiful." I said quickly, making Carly's jaw drop. After a moment, I realized what I said. I looked around the apartment to fill the awkward silence that followed. I spotted Spencer sitting on the floor, surrounded by like thirty hammers that appeared to be sorted into piles by color _and_ size. "What is all this, Spencer?" I asked, stepping forward.

"Freddie-." Carly said, a look on her face telling me that we weren't done about my comment but I gently brushed her off. She looked a little downcast but out of the corner of my eye I saw her shake off my brush off and stand a little straighter. She even smiled. Sometimes she could be just as strong as Sam.

Spencer smiled. "Just something I'm working on. You'll see."

"Last time you said that, the apartment building almost burned down." Carly said with concern in her voice. I couldn't help but remember the hour and a half we spent in the rain, waiting for the firemen to give us the all clear. My mother complained the whole time about how I was going to get sick and die now. She could be rather morbid.

"This time is different!" Spencer shouted desperately.

"YOU SAID THAT LAST TIME TOO!" She shouted and spun on her heel. Then she stormed up the stairs to the studio. I glanced at Spencer and from the top of the staircase I heard, "Don't hurt yourself or the apartment… again!"

I looked at Spencer, watching what he was doing. I figured if I gave Carly a moment to cool down, I wouldn't have to hear her whining about Spencer. "I thought you liked Carly." Spencer said suddenly and I looked at him confused.

"…I do."

"But you think Sam is beautiful." Spencer said matter-of-factly as if every word I said was to be taken as true.

"I only said that because now Carly can't be too mad about me calling Sam fat. And even if I did think she was beautiful, it doesn't mean I couldn't still like Carly. Which I do, of course." I replied with the same tone he gave me.

"Well, I'd be careful if I were you. Carly and Sam are both strong girls and you don't want to be stuck between them." Spencer said wearily, watching me through the corner of his eye. I shrugged at him and followed Carly upstairs.

Carly Shay sat perched on the small plastic table we sometimes used in sketches. She was deep in thought, her pretty little brow crinkled in the middle. I wondered what was being thought about under that silky brown hair. "What are you thinking about?" I asked from my tech-cart. She said nothing at first.

"Freddie… do you have a crush on Sam?" She said suddenly and with a look in her eyes that ran deeper than I could decipher.

I looked at her and paused. I didn't want to take too long to answer because then she'd think I was making up a lie but if I spoke too fast, she'd hear the denial in my voice—was there even denial in my voice? I _did_ not have a crush on Sam but I was afraid still of my dream… what if I was lying to myself about this? I was too confused to even give Carly an answer.

"Earth to Freddie." Carly said quietly, waving a hand in front of my face. I snapped out of my thoughts to realize that I had overshot the-making-up-a-lie-phase of my denial and was to the point where it was safe to say, anything I said now would be quickly dismissed as false.

"Sorry…I zoned out." I muttered with a defeated tone.

"Thinking about Sam?" Carly smiled that beautiful grin of hers, all her upper teeth, white and showing. It was the same grin she gave anyone when any relationships or _any_ kind of _love_ was involved. It was so cute, yet something deep inside my gut stirred with irritability. She was such a girl. And while I liked that about her, did she have to be so boy-crazy?

"No." I said blandly and I saw confusion flickering across her face. "Why would I want to date someone so nasty and cruel to me. I. Am. Not. A. Masochist." I think my tone was _too_ desperate.

"But you think she's-." Carly began.

"So what?" I snapped, probably a little too harshly. "I think a lot of woman are beautiful, Carly-. _Like you_. "But it doesn't mean that I want to date every single one." I said, looking over at Carly. She was the exception to that little rule—I wanted to date _her._

"Do you think I am beautiful?" She asked slowly, a red color creeping up her cheeks but don't get the wrong idea. She didn't like me…rather she was using me for gratification and she was just a bit shy doing so. In the years that followed, that last part would become more and more apparent.

"Of course." I said, smiling at her. I was aware that I looked like a lovesick puppy-dog pining after its master with a wagging tail. I was just glad that Puckett wasn't there to make some unnecessary and snide comment. Yet, somewhere I missed it. "You're the most beautiful girl I know." I was lying left and right it seemed… at least I was sure I was lying about the other stuff—I was definitely lying about Carly being the most beautiful girl I liked.

"Good because Johnny Nelson talked to me the other day," And I watched the same splash of color rise on her cheeks that rose on mine whenever I thought of her. I didn't feel so joyous but instead felt my stomach sink lower and lower into my gut. At least with Sam I _knew_ was being used or played with, with Carly though, it was a guessing game most of the time—thought nothing seemed to extinguish my feelings for her.

"That's great…"

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><p>That night on iCarly, Spencer had begged Carly to show his newest sculpture—which we had yet to see. Sam and I placed a bet about what it was. I said that it would be another giant robot like the bottle-bot while Sam protested that she thought it would be something that moved. I told her that the bottle-bot did move and she tried to break my pinky. Only Carly saved me from that.<p>

"AWWW!" Both girls screamed as we started the web cast. Carly was smiling while Sam looked absolutely terrified, and I couldn't help but smirk. It was all a sketch, of course, as they laughed and introduce themselves.

"Well, now that we have your blood pumping, we want to show you a new piece by my brother, Spencer!" Carly announced and I turned to where Spencer stood with his new creation under a tarp. My throat went dry—it was too short to be a robot.

"It is most definitely not a robot is it, Spence?" Sam said, darting her eyes at me mischievously and I groaned. She even burst out laughing when Spencer shot her a confused look. Carly looked exasperated and rolled her eyes. "Now it time to SHOW US THAT DOHICKY!" She intoned and did a little dance.

"Okay, well I call this 'Fan of Hammers'." He pulled away the blanket to reveal his creation. I had to admit, it was cool. It was round with various hammers nailed around it like numbers on a clock. "And watch, it moves." Spencer's eyes shone with something akin to childlike wonder as he plugged in his piece and it started to spin slowly.

It got faster and faster until it was going about as fast as a regular fan. Then the creaking started. It just didn't seem that safe anymore—Carly and Sam even started to back off. Spencer watched in horror as he lunged for the plug but one of the hammer's shot loose already. It flung through the air and narrowly missed hitting Carly. Luckily the brunette ducked. The blond behind her wasn't so lucky.

The hammer didn't impale her, as it would have done if it weren't for the fact that she ducked as well. Blood still sprayed across the floor and Sam opened her mouth in pained horror. Spencer and Carly were running to the blond in an instant. "Get her to a hospital," I heard Carly shout and Spencer just nodded.

I looked into the camera. "iCarly is experiencing some difficulties… the show is over for tonight. Don't worry Sam should be…fine." I said as was standard protocol and clicked the camera off. I knew that the fans would be freaking out but I needed to help.

"I'll get the car keys." Spencer said, jettisoning down the stairs two at time.

"I'll call Sam's mom." Carly followed her brother.

I was alone with the injured Sam who was leaning against the wall, her hand clamped over her wound. Her eyes were pressed shut and I kneeled beside her. I gently pulled her fingers from the injury. It wasn't deep but blood welled up and ran down her arm without stopping. I looked around for a towel…anything. I finally just sighed, pulled my shirt over my head and pressed it to the wound to help stifle the bleeding.

"Nice look for you, Fredbag." Sam smiled weakly, eyeing my chest. I could see the pain in her eyes. I knew that before she had been stabbed and punched but this was something altogether. It appeared that the hammer not only caught her flesh, but her delicate tendons as well.

"Quiet, Puckett."

"Don't tell me what to do." She said headily. Her head lolled slightly and she gave a lopsided grimace. "Only I tell you what to do. Now, lean forward, Benson. I have something to tell you."

I leaned, even though she smirked at my obedience. Then her lips found mine and that was no surprise but this time I felt resentment bubble up inside me. I shoved her away—shoved her right in the injured shoulder. She let out a piercing scream and lunged at me. Her one arm hung limply but her other was drawn back to punch me again.

Between each blow I coughed out, "I don't appreciated being lead on by you. I don't like you and never will." She only got angrier and tears ran down her face. I knew that this beating was probably well deserved but I still resisted.

Next thing I knew, Spencer was back with the familiar jangle of keys and a shout of confusion. Sam was being hauled off me and she was screaming something but her words were lost on my ears. By the time I rose into a sitting position—which wasn't long at all—Sam was already back in her previous state, silent and in pain.

Spencer shot me an oblong look and looked back at Sam. "Ready to go, Sam?" The blond nodded. "Help me, Freddie." I moved to her injured side and carefully tucked a hand under her armpit. She felt warm as if with a fever but that was just Sam. If I closed my eyes, I could imagine for a moment that Sam _was_ a guy like I had originally thought. She smelled of food and axe, and was overall more of a guy than I was sometimes—I'd never tell her that though.

The ride to the car wedged between Sam and Carly was a long one. Spencer felt guilty, Carly must have been feeling so as well, Sam was too pained and I was just too confused. I wondered what she had been yelling about. I wondered if Spencer had heard her but I was afraid to ask.

Sam collapsed as we carried into the Emergency Room. Some nurses were there immediately and rushed Sam into a room. Carly, Spencer and I followed, biting our lips and worrying. Yet as soon as we entered the room, we were shooed back out. The doctor was in there with her. When we were finally about to see her—after two hours—she was all stitched and bandaged up. The doctor told us that Sam's shoulder would heal pretty well considering the fact that she would need surgery in a year or two. We were told that her shoulder would be stiff until then.

Soon we were alone. "I'm going to get some fro-yo." Carly said and left. I had a feeling that the fro-yo was her way of dealing with the horror of what happened. Spencer just stood over Sam with a sad expression that was tinged with guilt. I wanted him to do something quirky. Finally I broke the silence. "What was Sam yelling as she hit me?"

Spencer looked over at me and smirked. "Don't hit my arm, Benson." He replied. That didn't answer anything—she hadn't beaten me up for my words but the fact I hit her arm. As I looked down at Sam, I felt sick that she was in this awful place and for the simple reason that I cared more than I should.

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><p><strong>AN** - Hopefully another chapter will be up by Thursday. R&R!


	6. iHelp Sam and Carly

**A/N -** Sorry about this being so late. There was some family drama I had to sort through. Hopefully I'll have another chapter by this weekend. R&R!

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><p>About the same time Sam was released from the hospital, Spencer and Carly's granddad were involved in the strangest custody battle. It wasn't the kind full of lawyers and legal documents but rather Carly crying to me about not wanting to go live in Yakima—and while I returned her sentiment, there wasn't much I could do since it was Spencer's nearly deadly sculpture that convinced Carly's granddad that maybe Spencer wasn't the greatest guardian.<p>

Of course, I thought Carly should stay with Spencer but all I could do for the brunette was shrug as she tried to come up with an idea so she could stay with Spencer. I wished Sam could leave the house because she was the evil mastermind of the group—I was smart, but not devious like that blond.

I was with Carly the first time I heard from Sam since she left the hospital. I was listening to Carly going on and on about how her granddad was overreacting. I nodded in agreement and tried to focus on the movie we were watching. I forgot the movie's name but it was about a girl who went blind and this great adventure she went on afterwards. It wasn't half-bad.

"I just can't understand why granddad would think Spencer was irresponsible." Carly bemoaned, resting her head on my shoulder—she was such a tease sometimes.

"Well, first Spencer dropped out of law school, has broken six bones-one of those being yours-in the last year and half, and he almost took off your head with a hammer only to tear up Sam instead." I said bitterly. We had this discussion six or seven times this week alone.

"Whose side are you on, Freddie?" Carly snapped, scrambling to the other side of the couch as if she couldn't bear to touch someone who didn't see eye-to-eye with her.

"I'm on yours. Do you think I want you to leave?" I replied, trying to keep the incredulous tone out of my voice. "I'm just saying that while I think Spencer is a fine guardian, your granddad does have a point. And-." Just then my phone vibrated in my pocket.

I stepped away from Carly's questioning gaze before checking the caller ID. It wasn't that I didn't want Carly to hear my phone call—I just wanted silence from her for a few minutes. "Hey, Sam. How are you doing?"

"Fine." He heard her snap on the other end. "Absolutely fine after getting hit with a HAMMER!" She screamed and her voice was strained as if she had been crying. Maybe she had but the thought just struck me as silly. Sam would _never_ cry—especially over something as trivial as physical pain.

"I know you didn't call to yell at me…" Actually I wasn't sure that she _didn't_ call me just to yell—she'd do that kind of thing. "What do you want?"

"Nothing. Can't I just call to chat?"

"Well, why would you call me and not Carly?" I asked, suspiciously.

"The same reason your talking to me right now instead of her—she is getting a bit annoying." I looked over at Carly. She had been texting Sam all day and I'm guessing at some point informed Sam about me being at the Shay's apartment. Carly smiled over at me and I walked further out of hearing range.

"I'm taking your call to be nice, not your previously aformentioned reason. but I shouldn't be so nice." I hissed at her. "You're always so mean to me. The only reason I'm even taking this call is because-."

"I don't want to be treated any differently, Benson." I sighed. Why was she being so difficult? And this strange insightfulness was distressing.

"I'm going-." I began.

"I had an idea about how Carly can get her granddad to realize Spencer is responsible."

"What is it?" I replied, listening intently. I sighed. "That is actually a good plan."

"You sound surprised, Benson."

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><p>After relaying the idea to Carly, we needed supplies so we went over to my house. My mom did some fashion designing in her free time. Mostly it was costume dresses for young girls in beauty pageants. She had some pretty strange supplies though-she had fishnet fabrics, red paint and even a pattern with blue ducks on it. I wondered if she <em>only<em> made dresses. Apparently not, I figured as I picked up the strange top.

"What about this?" I asked, holding out the black fishnet shirt.

"That's perfect," Carly gushed. "And once I chop up my Lords of Vengeance t-shirt, I can put this underneath."

"And, also, my mom has these colored hair extensions." I said, holding out a plethora of colors. Carly picked through the greens, blues and pinks.

"Why? She doesn't have long hair," Carly asked, suspiciously.

"It's for the pageant girls." I explained, not wanting to tell Carly that once upon a time when I was bed-ridden, my mom used to put wigs and extensions in my hair because it made me feel better. I know that sounds really bizarre but I liked it, and that was all that mattered. I didn't do it anymore, of course, and now my mom really did use them for pageant girls.

I turned to look for something else and I heard her take up scissors to cut her t-shirt. I was digging through a box of sparkly things. I knew I wouldn't find anything in there. Yet, when I turned around, though, I found a topless Carly. Her back was turned to me. She was still wearing her bra but her shirt was tossed haphazardly over a chair. She was pulling her newly tailored shirt over her head now but I hungrily ran my eyes over the curves of her back.

I spun around before she turned back to look at me. "How does it look?" When I turned, she was wearing the fishnet shirt under her t-shirt, a pair of black pants and boots. Around her throat was a choker and the last touch was the extensions.

"Amazing," I breathed. She was beautiful shirt-less but also was pretty in all that black. Something about it was hot. She shot me a small smile. "Now, want me to help you with the extensions?"

"Sure," She turned around, reminding me of a few seconds before. I shut the picture out of my head, and stepped forward. I began threading the colors through her hair. She was looking like a Goth now, and I liked it. "All set?" I stepped back and nodded. "Wish me luck."

"Luck." I said, watching her leave. I really hoped this plan of Sam's worked so that Carly could stay.

Thinking of Sam, my phone rang again. "What do you want now?"

"Wow, Fredbag, I'm so glad to hear your kind, welcoming voice." Sam said without a hint of anger or bitterness in her voice. She even laughed but her voice trailed off in pain.

"Yeah, yeah…what do you want?"

"Gosh, Fredweird, I just _feel_ the love." Sam laughed again. "My mom is going out and I need someone to help me around the house. I thought of you since Carly is dealing with her crazy granddad. Come over here and make sure I don't hurt myself?"

"I can come over but I'm not concerned that you'll get hurt. I'm more concerned about myself." I scoffed but turned to leave my apartment. "I'll be in there in ten minutes." I grabbed some food out of the fridge and started walking.

" Bring bacon. And thanks, Freddie." Sam said before hanging up. I stared at the phone bewildered. Sam would refer to me as Benson or even _thing_ before calling me Freddie. Then again that girl was hot _and_ cold. She was yelling or hitting me on second and kissing me the next. I just couldn't figure her out—that was the main reason I milked my feelings for Carly because she would be better in the long run. And, of course, there was the small fact that I didn't like Sam.

I was walking down the street as these ideas ran around my head. I kept saying that I preferred Carly but Sam kept crashing into my life, screaming and failing her limbs like a crazy person—and it was _always_ aimed at me. I hadn't even realized I was at Sam's door until I ran the doorbell.

I expected Sam's mom to open the door but it was Sam herself who looked out at me. "Come in, Frederly." She said, stepping back to let me in.

"Aren't you supposed to be in bed?"

"Is that where _you_ want me, Benson? Because all you had to do was ask." She smirked playfully as I followed her into the kitchen. "Now, did you bring my bacon?"

"Yea," I said, holding out the bag of meat. "It is seasoned…I think you'll like it."

"You care an awful lot about me." Sam said, pulling a piece of bacon out of the bag and munching it. She eyed me as I stood there, trying to look everywhere but at her. Yet, she wouldn't let me ignore her. She was right there, leaning against me. She finished the bacon and apparently wanted dessert now.

She leaned up, her lips meeting mine. I placed my hands on her wide, voluptuous hips and pressed back. In the front of my mind, there was her and her irresistible lips but in the back of my mind was Carly Shay…shirtless. Like Spencer had said, I was stuck between two strong women. One could snap me like a twig, the other could completely destroy me emotionally—and I wasn't sure which one I was more afraid of.

The only thing that saved me was that Carly didn't see me that way and that she didn't know of Sam's "advances". I wondered as she pulled her lips from mine, if she had any feelings for me at all or if she was just a horny teenage girl who was using me as her _fix_. "Sam…I can't do this."

"Then don't." She replied bluntly. "Let me." And her lips met mine again.  
>Maybe I liked kissing Sam a bit too much…<p> 


	7. iGo See a Movie

**A/N - **Two chapters in one day...I am beasting! XD The first part of this chapter isn't my favorite but I do love the end. :) Please read this and leave a review. Disclaimer: I think you should realize by now that i don't own.

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><p>On Monday, Sam and Carly came back to school—Sam was feeling well enough to go out and Carly was allowed to stay with Spencer. I heard the story about thirty times. complete lie. If Sam had died or Carly had left for Yakima, then my decision would have been easier, but I felt guilty for even thinking Both of my girls—if I dare to call Sam a <em>girl<em>—were still around, and I couldn't be happier. Actually, that was a complete lie. If Sam had died, or Carly went to Yakima then my decision between the two would be made easier. Then I felt quilty about the thoughts and promptly forced them thought from my head.

Upon coming into the school building, a few kids laughed at Sam's injury. She quickly and efficiently punched each of them with her good arm. She was only lucky that her left shoulder got messed up and not her dominant one. I was ambidextrous, so I'd have no problem but then again, I'm not going around punching people either.

"Oh my jelly beans! Sam, are you alright?" Gibby shouted, running up to Sam in the hall and throwing his shirtless self into Sam's arms. Sam looked ready to hit him but Carly patted Sam's good shoulder to calm the blond. "I saw what happened on iCarly!"

"Gibby…" Carly said slowly and the shirtless boy turned to her. "How about you go and... do something… elsewhere." She _was_ not a good liar. You'd think she'd learn from Sam at some point. Yet, Gibby just nodded and walked off, probably realizing how close he had just come to being disemboweled.

"Benson… did you remember the flyers?" Sam said to me suddenly.

"Yeah, of course." I replied, pulling the stack of papers out of my backpack. "Sam, you stole the shopping cart, right?" I asked. It was my idea to get the cart, and Sam was supposed to get it even thought Carly protested.

"_It's illegal… And Sam is already hurt enough as it is." Carly whined._

"_Hey, I'm not suggesting she do it…she just offered!" I replied._

"_Don't talk about me as if I'm not here!" Sam shrieked, anger blazing in her eyes. "I'm not a delicate flower like you Shay …I'll do it."_

I watched as she rolled a Wal-Mart cart out of the janitor's closet. She looked proud of her accomplishment. "Now, since _I_ stole the cart, _I_ get to ride in it."

"Hey, hey, I made the flyers!" I cut in.

"So?"

"So? So I should get to ride in the cart!"

"No me, Benson!"

"Guys!" Carly shouted. "You can take turns! Freddie, you ride first."

I took no time hopping into the cart and smirking at Sam. The jealous blond thumped my head but Carly started chewing out the blond before I could. The brunette always came to my rescue even if I could handle it myself—sometimes I just didn't want to handle it.

Finally, we were roving around the school, handing out flyers. A lot of kids from school knew about iCarly but not all. I lounged in the cart on a cushy pile of papers while Sam shot me dirty looks and handed out flyers. Carly just merrily pushed us along until Sam handed a flyer to a girl I saw occasionally around school and didn't really like. "Ew…iCarly?"

"It's a web show," Sam snapped in a patronizing tone. "Do you know what that is? Or should I draw you a picture?" I smirked at her mocking.

"Well, I would know about it... if it didn't suck." The girl paused and tossed her dark hair back over her shoulder. Then she paused. "Well, really, that's unfair of me. I don't know it sucks but I can be assured it does since it was never reviewed on ."

"Nevelocity?" Sam and Carly asked at the same time.

"Yeah," and the girl walked off.

"Freddie?" Carly asked.

"On it," I said, pulling my phone out and typing in the address. "It is a blog and review site. And it seems that people really pay attention to this Nevel fellow's opinions."

"Yeah, well, it doesn't matter to me." Sam snapped.

"Yes, but it doesn't matter to a lot of other people… the people who would be and is our audience." I told her. Sometimes all she cared about was herself. "We _need_ a review from this guy."

"Email him, Freddie." Carly begged, gripping my shoulder. I sighed and started typing up a message to ask Nevel to review our web show that night. After that, though, we returned to passing out flyers. No one else pointed out that we didn't have a review from Nevelocity again, and as last bell rang, we had a response that he'd be watching.

"Well, let's go and make a great web cast tonight!" Sam announced as we left, or should I say _Carly_ and _I_ left. Sam got detention for biting Ms. Briggs after the woman made a snarky comment about Sam's arm. "Or… maybe later tonight." Sam said, defeated as Carly scolded Sam for trying to skip out on her detention and sent the blond back into the school.

"Can she ever behave?" Carly asked bitterly, shaking her head.

"No," I said, looking back and smiling at Sam's retreating figure.

* * *

><p>That night's iCarly wasn't any different from any of our any shows except Sam ordered Chinese food right in the middle. Carly scolded her for it but Sam seemed not to care as long as she got her egg roll. Carly didn't give up the opportunity to do something new and funny on the show…except the deliveryman wasn't interesting. Not. In. The. Least.<p>

"What's your name?" Carly asked, sitting the man down.

"Chuck," the man choked out, nervously.

"So Chuck where are you from?" Carly asked.

"Wisconsin." Chuck replied.

"Are you in college?"

"No."

"Ok, oh what's the weirdest thing that's every happened to you while you were delivering food?"

"I don't know." _OH MY GOSH…this guy was THE stick in the mud. He had no personality…at all._

"Chuck, you're very boring." Sam said, finally admitting what we were all thinking. Chuck didn't seem very bothered by her statement as he was ushered out of the room. I smirked.

"And that ends our web show!" Sam and Carly sang, and we were out. I set the camera on my tech-cart and followed the girls downstairs. Carly's first priority after the show was to check if Nevelocity had emailed us back. Halfway down the stairs, though, Sam stopped walking and I bumped into her. Carly continued down into the living room and out of sight.

"What-."

"Shhh, Benson." Sam said silkily. She stood up on the tips of her toes but she still barely reached my chin, so I tilted my head down. As her fingers looped around the back of my neck, I couldn't understand what I was doing as my lips met hers.

"Are we going out, Sam?" I asked as she pulled away.

"No. Do you want to?" She asked, a sneer on her face.

"No, of course not."

"SAM? FREDDIE?" I heard Carly shout. I felt my throat constrict.

"Think quick, Benson." Sam used her good arm to throw me over her shoulder. I was flung down the stairs and rolled down the rest of the way to the floor. I groaned as I lay sprawled on the floor.

"Freddie!" Carly was shouting as if I was hurt but I really wasn't… I was used to Sam. And as Carly helped me sit up, I caught Sam winking at me. I _really_ wanted to wink back.

"Hey your toilet water's blue! Look at it!" Chuck flung himself back into the room, cradling toliet water in his hands. He opens his hands to show us and it splashed all over the floor. "I'll get more!" He shot back into the bathroom to get more water.

"_Now,_ he gets a personality." Carly snapped exasperatedly as she refresged ger email for the third or fourth time. We all laughed.

Then Spencer walked in. "Who is the dude playing in our toliet?" We all laughed some more. Then Carly shreiked and we all averted our attention to her.

"Nevel emailed me back and he wants to interveiw me!"

* * *

><p>The next Saturday, Carly went to Nevel Papperman's house for an interveiw and left me and that <em>thing <em>alone. I had been over Carly's house with Sam when Carly left. Sam was in the kitchen, _like usual_, using her one arm to dig through the refrigerator. I was on the couch, reading a manual on computer coding. "Want to go and do something, Frederly?" Sam asked suddenly.

"Like what?" I asked automatically. "Wait… why would you want to go somewhere with me?" I was suspicious now.

"I'm just bored… don't look into it." She snapped, menacingly, brandishing her fist at me. "If we leave now we can catch the two-fifteen… showing of the Fast and the Furious." She said, cocking her head as one does when trying to remember something.

"Did you have that memorized?" I asked, astonished.

"I always memorize movies and showtimes." She shot me a white smile and I had a small flashback to when Carly shot me a similar smile. Both girls were so alike and yet, so different. "Now, are we going?"

"Sure." I said, dejectedly. Anything was better than sitting on that couch.

She led me down the street, chattering animatedly about everything and anything. I wasn't exactly listening though. I was making a pro and con list in my head. On one side was Carlotta Shay, and on the right side was Samantha Puckett. And in the middle of it all was me. I needed to get this stuff sorted out—at this point, it was just dragging out and becoming annoying. Yet, it would be a while before anything could be sorted out.

"Popcorn, Benson?" Sam asked for like the third time. I finally heard her.

"Sure." I said as we walked up to the concession counter. Sometime after I fell into my thoughts, we arrived at the theatre and Sam bought our tickets. I didn't even know she had money.

As we reached the counter, the cashier leaned over and popped her gum loudly. Something about her reminded me of Spencer. Maybe it was her light smile and the light in her eyes. "What movie are you lovebirds going to see?"

"Um…well…" I stuttered.

"Come on, you can tell Auntie Deidre." She smiled broadly at us. We _had_ to hook up this girl with Spencer and the look on Sam's face shared my sentiment.

"Fast and the Furious." Sam replied, smiling as if she _was_ a civil human being. "Now, we want two large popcorns and two large sodas." As the girl turned to make us our orders, Sam said, "Hey, Deidre, we know a really cool guy. You should call him sometime." Sam slid a piece of paper across the counter and the girl snatched it up.

"Okay," The girl smiled brightly, tucking the number in her pocket. "Enjoy your movie."

"We will," I called back as we walked to our theatre. "Why did you do that for Spencer?"

"You do nice things for the people you care about." She said blatantly.

"But you don't do nice things for the people you care about unless you…like them." I trailed off, realizing the truth. It explained a few things, like why Sam didn't snap at Spencer when he did things that should bother her, or why she enjoyed hanging out at the apartment when Carly wasn't around.

"Yeah…" She said, blushing, guessing that I figured it out.

"THEN WHY DO YOU KEEP KISSING ME?" A few people turned and looked.

"Watch it, Benson." Sam snapped. "I don't kiss and tell."

"You don't have to tell _me_ if you are kissing _me_." I could here the strain in my voice. "Are you ever going to explain what is going on?"

"I thought I made it clear that it _never happened_." She said, slamming the door to the theatre open and stomping to a row in the middle. She sat down with a loud sigh.

"But then why are you talking about it now?" I snapped, and I heard a few people in the rows behind us groan for us to be quiet. What was their problem? The movie hadn't even started yet.

"Because _you_ brought it up!" She screamed, "And I really want you to drop this!"

"Yeah, but how can you expect me to when all you do is lead me on! Why do you do it? Does it give you some kind of kick to cause me this emotional pain? I can understand the physical pain, it's your way of keeping people away but when you play with my emotions, then it becomes more than that. You are just attacking me because…because…" I was choking on my words, Sam looked pained, yet she was hanging on my every word.

"What, Benson? Spit it out." Sam snapped, raising her hand as if to smack me. She never did though because I finished my sentence.

"Because you are a bitch!" I shouted, and from behind me I heard an "oooooh" from those teenagers that wanted us to be quiet before. Now even they were hanging on my every word. I pulled my thoughts away from them to look at Sam—and she looked as if I had hit her. This could not have been the first time someone called her that, yet she got up to leave. "Sam…"

"Don't, Benson. This _bitch_ will leave if that what you think about her." She hissed, flung the popcorn at my head and stormed out. I sat there, listening to the teens behind me laugh and jeer…so immature.

Just then my phone rang. "Hey, Carly." I said, walking out of the theatre as the movie started. "What's up?"  
>"<p>

That nevel guy… a kid… tapanade… and on my cheek… for nothing and I can't… do anything!" Carly just spoke in a jumble that I hardly heard. I was outside now and it was raining. I put up the hood on my jacket and pressed into the growing darkness. Lightning shot across the sky in the distance—it was like a really bad cliché scene in a movie. The only thing that could make it worse was if I ran after Sam in slow motion while screaming her name. But in the movies, they only did that with people you loved… "Freddie, are you there?"

"Yeah, that guy sounds terrible." I muttered, distracted.

"Hey, are you with Sam because she won't pick up her phone."

"No…I am not with Sam…"


	8. iAm Intoxicated

**A/N -** Sorry for the _extremely_ late update. I wanted to post yesterday but I had to go to the doctor and then I went to the Katy Perry: California Dreams Tour, which was insanely awesome and you should go to if you get the chance. :) I cranked out this chapter this morning. I will have another one for you tomorrow, promise. Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't own. R&R.

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><p>After my little movie fiasco with Sam, she was avoiding me. I didn't see her but I knew there were times she had seen me and fled the scene. What was wrong with that crazy girl? I mean, she kissed me <em>all<em> the time, apparently had a small crush on Spencer and now she was mad at me because I told her what she was. She was a bitch, and she knew it—once she even told me that she was proud of it.

It didn't help anything that when Carly went on her little interview, she found a slimy eleven-year-old boy boy. Carly called both Sam and I over and started her rant about it. "Okay, when I got there, Nevel sat next to me, sniffed my hair, showed me an x-ray of his brain, tried to make me dance, and then he kissed me!"

Everything went silent and when I glanced at Sam she wasn't even paying attention. I looked back at Carly. It had only been at least a second since she stopped talking but it felt about two or three minutes. "Woah, he _kissed_ you?" Sam's head perked up. "That jerk! Come show my lips exactly what he did!"

"Yeah, I don't think so." Carly giggled.

Sam was looking at me now, a giant smirk on her face. She patted my back and said, "You just keep making out with your stuff animals, Benson!"

Sam seemed fine after that. I could sense she was still mad but at least she was laughing and joking with Carly, and beating on me as usual. I liked Carly, but I usually wouldn't say something that would get me so blatantly rejected—I did it for Sam because even in all her twisted ways, she was still my friend, though she'd never admit it. And I had known she'd laughed about it.

Sam even ventured to sit next to me on the couch. She didn't say anything and made sure our knees didn't even touch, but she wasn't trying to keep a ten-foot radius from me anymore. I was sure if that would be a good thing or bad thing in the long run but before I could figure it out, Carly said, "And Nevel said I would _rue_ the day… What does rue mean?"

"It means to regret." I blurted near instantly. My mom did this stupid word-a-day game where if I used the word twice throughout the day, she'd give me an apple. I stopped doing it years ago but not before I learned a plethora of words.

"Dork." Sam hissed

"_Thing._" I returned, and she turned to glare at me.

"Guys…" Carly said, diverting our attention back to her. "What do you think Nevel meant?" It dawned on all of us almost immediately.

I was the first off the couch with Carly and Sam following. I typed in the web site address and the screen that popped up showed an article—the headline read: _iCarly: Worst Webshow on the Internet._

"A web cast that not only makes stupid jokes, but makes you stupid by just watching it. Their _silly_ sketches are mediocre at best, and the camera work is rather sub par. The worst part has to be the show's hosts. At first glance, we have two pretty girls who are the pinnacle of web comedy. Upon further inspection, I find them shallow and unfunny. Neither girl is particularly good-looking either. Carly is the worst of the two, of course, because of the fact that she is an uninteresting, one-dimensional girl who deserves to have a bag put over her head and duct tape over her mouth." I read slowly and with a grimace on my face.

"Is there any more?" Carly asked tentatively.

"Yeah, but its all about your hair and how it is a 'disgusting rat's nest that smells like it hasn't been washed in weeks.'" I looked at Carly sadly.

Sam was seething about it all. "That… that… little… NUB!" She shrieked, her face red. "I could just KILL him! How dare he give us a bad review because you wouldn't suck face with him!"

Just then the front door burst open. I turned slowly—it was my mom. At the same time Spencer came from upstairs and whatever he had been doing. "I came because I heard screaming. Freddie, are you alright?" She blurted and I saw Sam snicker. Was she spying on me or something?

"Yeah, mom." I answered.

Spencer looked us over. "He's fine." The older man reported.

"You know he's allergic to fruit?" My mom said. She had it in her mind that grapes, apples and watermelon were out to get me. I mean, she didn't let me have fruit juice until I was seven and she sat watching me the entire time I drank it to make sure I didn't have a reaction. I had sneeze half-way through and she freaked out. "Did you give him any fruit?"

"I'm not allergic to fruit, mom," I said, a finality in my voice urging her to leave. This could only get worse.

"Aw, who's got a fruit problem?"

Everything else just fell away for a moment. While everyone else stared at my mom arguing with Spencer about my allergies, Sam leaned forward and whispered in my ear. She didn't stop there, though. Her tongue then snaked out and flicked across my lobe causing me to stiffen as tingles filled my body. Sadly, as I glanced at Carly, almost guiltily, I wanted Sam to do it again…

Carly hadn't see Sam and I, though, as she turned away from my mom and Spencer. She just smirked at me and looked back at the computer screen. "We need to teach that boy a lesson."

"I'll get my butter sock." Sam said, standing and pulling off her shoe. I never once thought that she used her own sock to beat people. I figured maybe she stole a sock off a hobo or something. It was something she would do.

"Sam… we are not going to beat up the boy." Carly said, softly.

"In the third paragraph, he called you fat."

"Let's go beat up that boy!"

I just smiled and followed my girls out of the apartment, past my mother and Spencer who were _still_ arguing, to do just that—beat up or argue with a first-rate nub.

* * *

><p>We didn't beat up Nevel in the end. We told on him to his mom and she forced him to write a good review. I still couldn't believe that he would write a mean review just because he was mad at Carly. Well, I guess that's eleven-year-olds, for you.<p>

After we got back, I didn't go home. Instead I went out on the fire escape while Carly and Sam when back to Carly's apartment. I swear, that nasty blond hangs out more at Carly's house than her own, but considering how she turned out, I wouldn't want to be at her house either.

I was looking down at the city with its cars the only moving dots in a sea of night. The small light that drifted out from the hallway didn't reach very far so there wasn't much for me to see, not that it matter though considering that I was thinking once again about a beautiful brunette and a spunky blond. Carly was nice but Sam made me feel like she and I were the only two people in the world. She _was_ also moody and violent.

"God, why does this have to be so hard?" I thought aloud, gripping the railing.

"If you're going to jump, you should at least say goodbye first." I turned slowly to face Sam. I looked at her confused as she came out with me on the escape. "But I hope that you'll change your mind."

"Change my mind? Wouldn't you be grateful?" I asked, eyeing her suspiciously as she walked up to me. She looked up at me with her big blue eyes.

"What would make you think that, Frederly?" I was going to protest but her hand was on my chest suddenly. She tucked her face under my chin and sighed content, warm breath onto my skin. I didn't mean to shiver as her arms snaked around my waist, or when her hand reached up and caressed my face.

Next thing I knew, her lips were on my neck, my chin, my cheek and then my lips. She pressed her tongue, almost viciously, into my mouth and I felt my heart thump against my chest, and against her because she was so close. Her hands pressed lightly on the small of my back, tracing small patterns. My own hands gripped her ribs just below her breasts as I dipped my head to hers.

Every part of me was screaming. My brain was screaming to stop, that this was the demon I so despised while my heart cried that I loved Carly, not this _beast_. But I didn't stop because of how it felt to be with her. The few times Carly hugged me or gave me a peck on the cheek, it never felt the way it did when Sam did it. She was like a drug—intoxicating.

Sam pulled away finally and took my numb hand. She led me to the stairs and lowered me slowly down until I sat. She then joined me, tucking herself under my arm as if this was the most perfectly normal thing for her in the world. Then a strange thought struck me—What if I wasn't the only guy she did this with?

I felt myself flare with anger at the thought. Then another thought crossed my mind. I was kind of doing the same thing. Of course, I wasn't going around kissing Carly and leading her on because she didn't feel the same way towards me but she knew my feelings for her… and yet here I was, making out with my "enemy".

Silence fell for a few moments while our lips met again, our tongues fighting one another for dominance. Sam's teeth suddenly snapped shut on my lip and while it hurt, it also felt good. I let her win… whatever that meant exactly. She leaned back and I opened my eyes to find my eyes staring in hers. "I couldn't stay mad at you, Fredamame."

I didn't know what to say to that. So I said the first thing that popped into my head. "Sam, this has to stop. You don't even like me and I don't like you."

"But you like _it_." She corrected me, winking. "And you're right, Benson… I hate you." And if I didn't think this was just a game to her before… Her lips meet mine again, sultry and sweet. Then she was gone. When I opened my eyes, all I saw was a swatch of blond hair disappearing back inside.

I held my head for a few moments wondering vaguely if I had imagined it all. Though, a dull, throbbing ache in my bottom lip said otherwise. I went home finally, feeling as if I built a huge house of cards only to sneeze right before I could take the picture of the final product. And when I rolled into bed, it was hours before I finally could drift to sleep… and dream of her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN -** If you noticed I left out the whole butter sculpture thing, the Germy part, and the whole scene where they go to bust Nevel because there wasn't a whole lot there to begin with and it just wasn't essential to my story. This will happen increasingly more where I pick and chose what I want to write. :) Read and reveiw please!


	9. iAm Her Friendwithbenefits

**A/N -** This chapter is not affliated with any episodes but I promise that the next one will be. I don't have a lot to say expect please review! And (disclaimer) I don't own.

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><p>I didn't want to be just a friends-with-benefits with Sam. I knew that was where we were or where we were heading. Besides the kissing, there wasn't too much endearing about the blond and yet I constantly found myself pressed up against the wall, kissing the same girl who I, for the most part, hated. And the guilt kept me awake for most of the night.<p>

I stopped trying to get Carly to fall in love with me. If I couldn't keep my hands off of one Samantha Puckett, how could I even dare try to get with another girl? Sam noticed it too, and one day when we were intertwined in the janitor's closet, she brought it up. "I noticed your not chasing Carly anymore."

I pulled away from her and sat on a crate across from her. "Yeah, it just doesn't seem worth it anymore." I said dejectedly, hanging my head as I spoke.

"Why?" Sam asked slowly as if afraid of the answer. "Are you falling in love with me?" She asked cautiously, and I realized that was the last thing she wanted and the last thing I needed.

I leaned forward and took her hands in mine. Sam stiffened with suspicion as I began to speak softly—in actuality I just wanted to make her squirm. "Sam, I promise you, I _will_ never fall in love with you." She let out a sigh of relief.

"Don't do that to me, Benson." She laughed nervously which fell away into an uncomfortable grimace. Just then outside the bell rang loudly and both of us jumped. "Shit… now I'll be late for my next class." Neither of us would leave the closet together when there was a great chance of our little _affair_ being discovered.

"Is this Sam Puckett worrying about school?" That earned me a sharp punch in my shoulder. I frowned and rubbed my shoulder. "You really don't have to do that."

"Yes, I do. If I don't, you might get the impression that I _like_ you." She scoffed. "Which I don't," She quickly added, tossing her hair over her shoulder.

"Oh yeah… _that_ is the only thing that would make me think that you like me." I rolled my eyes at the blond and she raised her fist as if to hit me but paused. I paused to and listened. The next bell rang. "Okay, let's get out of here."

We pressed into the hallway, cautiously. A few kids were at the end of the hall, chatting aimlessly by their lockers but they didn't turn and see two enemies leaving the janitor's closet together. I was grateful as Sam walked away from me. Every single one of our meetings was just one step closer to getting discovered. And I didn't know what I'd do if people found out—they'd all assume I was in love with the one person who I was furthest from loving.

At least, in my mind, I finally figured out that Sam and I had no feelings for one another—it was merely lust. Carly was the one whose personality I loved. She was pretty too, and she didn't roll her eyes at my tech-talk. Yet, Sam was so alluring with her curves and her soft, un-chapped lips that I couldn't help but sink into her advances. And for that I lost Carly…

As I sat in class, I was staring out the window instead of listening to Ms. Briggs as she explained how the ancient Greeks had aqueducts and actual plumbing. I was too busy thinking about how weak I was. Not physically but emotionally. I didn't even hear Ms. Briggs ask me a question.

"Freddie," She croaked for about the fifth time. This time I heard her and turned slowly to face her. She was hovering just a few feet in front of my desk and for once I regretted taking a seat in the front of the room. Ms. Briggs wore a dangerous sneer as she glared at me with her black, beady eyes. "Go to the office, Benson." She snapped.

I felt numb all over. I just got in trouble. I wasn't Sam Puckett. I was Fredward Benson… And I _never_ got in trouble. Then again, I was lying to my best friend, skipping classes and making-out with my mortal enemy next to a mop bucket whenever I got the chance. I wasn't exactly the same boy I had been a few months ago. What would my mom think? Of course, I'd never let her find out.

I stood and gathered my book bag and walked out the door. I frowned as I looked at the deserted hall stretching out in front of me. Leave it up to me to get kicked out of class because of… I shook my head as I reached Principle Franklin's office. I knocked.

_This is all Puckett's fault, _was the last thing I thought as I heard Principle Franklin call me in. I pushed the door open and I felt my breath catch in my throat. There, sitting in front of his desk, was Sam. I glared at her as I walked up to Principle Franklin.

"Your mom will be here to pick you up in ten minutes, Freddie." The Principle told me and I felt my jaw drop. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. So I was never in trouble? I felt so stupid and I felt my face turn red. "You can go and wait out front. And Sam, just go back to class." With a wave of the older man's hand we were dismissed.

I started to walk out to the front parking lot when I heard a second set of footsteps behind me. I stopped and looked back at the blond. "Why are you following me? Don't you need to get back to class?"

"Who cares about class?" She barked at me, crossing her arms and threatening me to argue. How things changed from one moment to the next… "Well, except for you and all the nubs of the world."

"What do you want, Sam?" I asked, exasperated—I still internally blamed her for everything wrong with my life.

"To come with you." She said slowly.

"You know, my mom isn't your mom, she'll never let you come with us."

"I didn't mean like _that_, Benson. I am going to come and sit with you until your mom comes." She said with a kind of finality that caused me to just shake my head and continue outside. I took a seat on a low wall, the one that was built to keep the dirt in the flowerbeds. Sam lowered herself beside me before scooting over and tucking herself carefully under my arm. Anyone who saw us would have thought the gesture sweet and us dating but they'd be sadly mistaken… or maybe not so sadly.

"What are we doing?" I asked, glancing at my phone and then back at Sam.

"Are you having some moral dilemma, Fredbag?" Sam snapped, pulling away from me and glaring. "Because if you are then-."

"No, no." I snapped. "I just mean, what is this? Are we dating or are we some kind of friends-with-benefits?"

"Well, don't you have to be having sex to be consider friends-with-benefits?" Sam looked at me and since I had nothing to say so I let the conversation drift into silence. I checked my watch again… three minutes. "Wait… is that what you want?"

"What?" I said quickly, looking at her expression of dawning realization.

"Sex… is that what you want?" She asked quietly but she didn't seem angry.

"No."

"So you wouldn't do _it_ with me?" Her voice was both hurt and menacing. I looked at her with concerned confusion—why did she care? I thought she was just using me as gratification just as Carly was but in a different way. Both girls wanted to be told they were beautiful and shown that someone loves them even if it's not in _that_ way. Just neither exactly wanted it from me… but I was all they had.

"I would but-."

"Okay." She said suddenly and with the same finality she constantly used to end conversations. I glanced at her wide-eyed.

"Okay… what?"

"We can try it." She said making a crude hand gesture as if I didn't already understand what she was getting at.

"What… really?" I was confused and not very enthusiastic but she bore the same expression as she lazily watched me to see if I had more to say.

"Yeah, text me later." She smiled and left me. It was just in time too as my mother pulled up about a minute later, honking her horn and yelling something about how dangerous it was to sit outside alone. I rolled my eyes and got in the car.

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><p>My mom wanted to take me to see the doctor before she worked a double that evening so when I was finally home, I was alone. I lay in my bed watching my alarm clock change from 6:30 to 6:31. I sat up and started digging in my discarded backpack for my phone.<p>

_Freddie -_ **Hey, Sam, are you still up? **

_Sam -_ **I'm outside. **

_Freddie -_** Really? **

_Sam -_** Yeah, just open the window, Benson. **

I didn't believe Sam until I peered out the window to see a blond haired girl peering back. I reached up and slid open the window. Sam was in my room in an instance. She immediately threw herself on my bed and stretched like a cat. Her black tank top shifted revealing the pale white skin of her stomach, and now I couldn't keep my eyes off her.

"So… um…?" I began slowly. I couldn't believe that Sam would actually go through with this or at least with me—she _hated_ me… I thought.

"First, you're going to make me this bacon." She reached in her purse that dangled off her shoulder. I watched her in confusion until she actually pulled out a pound of bacon. "Don't just stand there gaping, Fredwad! Go make Mama some dinner."

I took the bacon from her and went into the kitchen, turning on the dim overhead light. Sam followed me into the small space. "Is this really your dinner?"

"Yep, so chop-chop." She snapped. When she was hungry, she was impatient. "Once that is done, we can get down to business."

I sighed and turned the burner on. Soon the bacon was popping and sizzling in the pan, so I covered it and let it be. I looked over at Sam for a sign that all of this was a joke… or something. Kissing the blond was one thing but anything more—well, actually it brought the blood rushing into my cheeks and I ducked my head so Sam wouldn't see.

I checked her bacon again, scooting it around the pan with a fork when I felt two arms snake around my waist. I replaced the lid and turned to sink into a long kiss with the blond. Her hands played with my hair and at one point she leaned back in concentration. I glanced at my reflection in the microwave and realized that she braided a long strand of my hair. "Hey," I laughed, checked the bacon and swooped back in for another long kiss.

Sam was more impatient than I thought, though, and it wasn't just about the bacon. She started pressing her lips against my harder than usual, causing me to back up until I hit a small cabinet. I heard a crash and next thing I knew I was covered in flour. The bag fell right on my head and exploded in a cloud of white powder. Sam got a good majority of it on her as well.

"Are you okay?" I laughed as she rubbed her hands on her arms, sending more powder to the ground.

"Do I look okay?" She spat at me, looking dangerous as she whipped her hair around like a dog. To escape her wrath and not burn her dinner on top of the flour incident, I scooted past her to check her bacon. "You got some in my eye."

"Sorry, Sam but you were the one shoving me." I turned to her, taking the fork with me in case I would need to defend myself with it. She didn't attack me though. I watched her grip her face in her hands and slid to the floor with a thud. "Sam!" I crouched by her.

I was suddenly on my back with Sam sitting on me, straddling my hips. It is not what you think either. She was beating me up this time. She grabbed a handful of my hair and slammed my head into the linoleum floor and slapped me across the face a few times before she seemed to decide that punishment was enough. Then she just threw flour in my face.

I grabbed a handful too and we rolled across the floor, throwing flour at one another in a full out war. Sam was winning, of course, because she kept grabbing my face and smearing it across the flour-coated floor while laughing maniacally. I couldn't stop laughing and decided to tickle her. Her scream-like laughter filled the apartment as I tickled her stomach and armpits. "Stop! Stop, Benson!"

She jumped me again and simply sat on my chest. I smiled up at her and she returned it before leaning down and kissing my forehead. That was a strange gesture from her but I said nothing about it.

"You're going to have to let me up if you want that bacon." I coughed and she hauled me to my feet even. I checked it and was finally able to transfer it to a plate and pass it to the blond. "Here, Sam."

After she ate—I didn't get any—she spared no time in going back to my bedroom. She even shut me out for a few minutes. I stood outside the door, waiting irritably. I wasn't really into this to begin with, was forced to wait for her bacon to be finished and now I wasn't even allowed into my own room.

Finally the door swung open and Sam was standing there wearing what she was wearing before except she had taken off her black tank top. Underneath she was wearing a black, lacy bra and sticking up past the waistband of her blue jeans were orange boxers… _oh, Sam._

She pulled me into the room, kissing me the entire time. I tried not to stare at her as she sat me down on the bed and continued to kiss me. "Sam…" I said between kisses. "Sam…"

She paused. "What?"

"I'm not ready to do this." I said softly as if I were telling her a secret.

"Okay," She said suddenly, rising and pulling her shirt back on. She didn't seem upset or angry. "Night, Benson." She smiled at me and ducked back out my window. I sighed… at least I didn't do anything too stupid tonight. Now, though, it was time to clean up the mess we made in the kitchen. I should have made her stay and help.

It was about an hour of scrubbing and mild vacuuming before I was convinced I had cleaned up enough. I washed the pan and lid I used to cook, and I shoved the flour bag as deep as I could in the trashcan. Finally I was done, and tired as I ever felt. So I stumbled into my room and passed out in the bed.

In a few hours when my mom came home, I was awake again. I was thinking about tonight and how Sam seemed almost grateful not to do _it_. Yet, she had been all set to just my bones but the second I said no, she backed off. Not that I expected her not to back off, but she just left without a fight. Did she not want it in the first place? Or was it something else? And what about that kiss on my forehead…? It as if she cared more about me than just my kisses.

My door swung open and my mom walked in. I squeezed my eyes shut as she leaned over me and gave me a kiss in the same spot Sam had. "Night, Freddie." She said. I felt her tug at my hair and I knew she discovered the braid that Sam left in my hair. Then I heard her walk back out. Then I heard, "Why does it smell like bacon? Weird…"

I smiled faintly as I drifted back into sleep.

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><p><strong>AN **- I'm such a tease, huh? It just didn't seem right that either would go through with it. So don't hate me too much. :P R&R!

**Edit **- I've taken a job at a local farm helping plant and such so I won't be able to write as much. I will be updating two times a week. I will update more if I get them done faster but only expect two a week. Sorry guys but I will not be abandoning the story any time soon. :)


	10. iGo on a Date

**A/N -** I stayed up almost all night to finish this... I was so busy today. Sorry about the late update. Disclaimer: I don't own this or the characters or the show...thank you. R&R please!

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><p>For the next few weeks, Sam and I were dancing around what happened…or didn't happen. We were actually more civil than usual and our meetings during school were tapering off. I didn't know why, but nothing seemed wrong with Sam. Maybe she started to feel guilty about keeping it from Carly. I said nothing about it. I didn't miss it all that much. It was strange; I missed our playing and joking around even more.<p>

When I was alone I couldn't help but replay the flour incident. The way it went from making out to something completely different—like two kids just having a blast. It was something I had been missing all those years when I was bedridden. She was my friend-with-benefits but now as we joked lightly during lunch and watched TV huddled on the couch, we were friends.

Carly went upstairs to get something out of the studio and made us promise not to kill each other while she was gone, when Sam said something that bewildered me. "You know that girl, Valerie… in French class?" I nodded, not sure where the conversation was going. "I heard she like you."

"Yeah… and?" I mumbled.

"You should ask her out." She said and sounded so much like Carly for a moment I stiffened. I glanced at her confused. She had never been like Carly—trying to play matchmaker or whatever Carly called it. I think she called it being helpful. And why did Sam all of a sudden have an interest in my love life? She didn't care when she was sticking her tongue down my throat.

"Why do you care?" I asked, trying not to sound irritated.

"I don't know. I just thought maybe you liked her." Sam said defensively, her tone turning dark and when I glanced at her, her usually bright blue eyes were almost black. I wondered if maybe a body snatcher took away my blond-headed demon and replaced her with a Carly clone in Sam's body. Yet, this strange girl sitting across from me on the couch still had that Puckett attitude.

"She's nice." I said shallowly at first. Then I started thinking about it more. Valerie did seem nice and if she did like me, it wouldn't be a repeat of what I went through with Carly, constant rejection and dying hopes. Maybe I could just ride off into the sunset with this other chick and forget about Sam and her soft lips…

"Yeah, unlike me." Sam said, crossing her arms and keeping her eyes fixed on the television set. I watched her profile a moment before allowing the conversation to end. It didn't seem worth continuing and there was nothing more to say. Though incomprehension still plagued my mind. She did it again, confusing me with her almost bipolar ways.

"Um…Sam, can I ask you something?" I started, just needing to know something. I asked it before and I wanted to ask it again but her look stopped me in my tracks. The words dribbled out of my mouth, messy and confusing.

"No." She said sternly, turning off the TV, standing up and just walking out. She didn't seem angry or upset but it did seem like something a TV show would do to emphasize the finality of the conversation—yet, this wasn't a television show, this was my crazy, mixed-up life.

"Where did Sam go?" Carly asked, coming back down with a mysterious shoebox. She looked in the kitchen automatically as that was the blond's favorite hideout but it was strangely devoid of the ham-loving girl.

"That way." I said with a shrug and pointed at the front door. Carly sighed and plopped down the couch next to me, leaning her head on my shoulder. It was just a habitual gesture for her but I wanted to push her off me. The girl was genuine but generally unaware of the way she led me on—luckily I was planning on asking out Valerie, not her.

* * *

><p>"It's Valerie, right?" I asked sweetly, smiling at the brunette. She turned to me and I caught a glimpse of brown eyes. As she looked me over, a broad smile stretched across her face. "I'm Freddie." I offered a hand to her.<p>

Just then the teacher, Ms. Kellie bustled by. "In French, Monsieur Benson."

I rolled my eyes and started to formulate the sentence in my head. "Veux-tu… sortir avec… moi?" I asked, closing my eyes and praying silently that I said it right. I didn't want to stammer or beat around the bush so I just went straight in for the kill. _Will you go out with me?_ That seemed straight forward enough for me.

"Je ne comprends pas un mot que vous venez de dire." She informed me sadly. Of course, I couldn't expect her to be that good at French that she'd understand me. It was most kid's hardest subject. I was just lucky that I had a sort of knack for foriegn languages. "Mais si vous m'avez demandé sur une date, la réponse est oui."

I smiled at her. "I was, and I'll take you out for a movie on Saturday." I told her brightly and her returned smile was all I needed to know that I had a date! "I will talk to you later."

"French, Benson! This is not English class." Ms. Kellie snapped and threw her hands in the air. "_French!_" The teacher cried again, her outburst causing laughter to fill the room. She glared around at the students and back at me. I shrugged and grimaced at her, much to her chagrin.

I was surprised that Ms. Kellie didn't give me detention as I walked over to Sam who was sitting with her legs up on the desk and her hands crossed over her chest. "So, did you ask her, Fredlumps or did you chicken out like the girl you are?"

"Being a girl doesn't make you a chicken." I countered.

"Humph." She snorted, swinging her legs to the ground and bringing her face to mine. Her hand came up to hold my chin as if she was making it so I couldn't look away. "Listen, Benson, I think we established this before…you've made out with a guy." She paused to gauge the look on my face before letting go of my chin and laughing hysterically. A few kids looked over at the two of us, including Valerie.

Then a scary thought crossed my mind, what if Valerie thought I liked Sam? I know I just asked her out but that didn't mean she still couldn't be insecure about my sincerity. Then another thought, worse that the first one peeked into my head, was I insecure about my sincerity? I banished all thoughts and thumped Sam hard in her arm.

"What was that for, Frednerd?" Sam spat at me, the venom in her voice dangerous. She leaned close to me as if going to kiss me—I hoped Valerie wasn't watching; I was in a rather incriminating position. Her silky, minty breath washed over me and I feigned disgust. "Afraid that your little girlfriend would be jealous of me?"

"Why are you doing this Sam? I thought you wanted me to get with Valerie." She cocked an eyebrow at me, telling me that she didn't get my point. "Why, twenty seconds after I ask her out, you get all up on me? Is this some kind of mind game?"

Sam looked thoughtful. "I think it was longer than twenty seconds." I could strangle her…seriously. "More like sixty." She venture, raising her eyebrows at me. It seemed a harmless gesture but it was something more along the lines of a threat…what for though, I wasn't sure.

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><p>Valerie was a really cool girl, I realized as we sat in the theatre watching the newest Girly Cow in Space movie. The space cow movies were lame but in such a way that they were funny. Yet, most of my laughing was due to Valerie's whispered comments. She had a sense of humor that most comedians would envy, and that I envied.<p>

As we first came in, the first thought that came to mind was that this was exactly the same theater as the one Sam and I had our fight in, but now, my mind was on my hand, which was entangled in the popcorn container with Valerie's hand. Which unlike when I came with Sam, still had popcorn in it an hour into the movie. I smiled at the sweet, civil girl next to me. This is what I wanted with Carly… normality. Something that I never got in my make out sessions with Sam, but now found in a complete stranger.

"To be honest, Freddie, I've seen this before. Can we go?" Valerie asked softly, her breath tickling my ear. I expected shocks to spread through my body but it was just a tickle, an itch that was gone in a flash.

"Yeah, sure." I said, slowly, my hands turning clammy in her hand. I followed her out into the main lobby where we walked with each step in sync. It was as if we were in a careful, beautiful dance with only one step. _One. Two. One. Two._

We stepped out into the brisk evening and I thought about calling my mom but Valerie suggested a walked. I nodded and followed the brunette down the street towards the park there. "I want to swing," She told me, smiling, and I nodded. She was so innocent.

When we got there, I didn't feel like swinging and so I stood behind her, pushing her higher and higher as her laughter filled the night air. I stepped back and watched her whisk by me, a bright smile on her face. Something about this girl was so incredible. Maybe it was the foreign way she looked at everything like it was brand-new and perfect. Or maybe it was just that smile, so genuine. Either way, she was fantastic.

"Psst." I heard a hiss and I turned in surprise to see a blond head illuminated by streetlamps peeking out from behind a tree. Her blue eyes flicked over me, beckoning me to her. I walked slowly behind the tree, confusion plastered on my face like a sign. "Hey, Fredward, how's the date?" She asked, her tone mocking…as usual.

"Sam, what are you doing here? Are you following us?" I asked in a harsh whispered, furious at her intrusion.

"Not following exactly. I used your Pear Phone to hack into that chip your mom has in your neck and used it to track you." She said matter-of-factly, as if it was usual for a straight-F student to MacGyver a phone to track a chip that I didn't even know about.

"A c-chip?" I stammered, clamping a hand over the back of my neck.

"Oh…were you not supposed to know about that?" Sam tittered annoyingly. I glanced behind me nervously, checking that Valerie hadn't noticed my absence just yet. I knew she couldn't swing forever though and promptly forgot about the unforgivable violation of privacy on part of my mom and Sam.

"What do you want?" I snapped, hands crossed over my chest.

"You," Sam said, her eyes fluttering seductively as she draped her hands around my neck, and pressed her lips to mine. I felt the butterflies take up a whirlwind in my gut and I suddenly felt sick. I pressed my hand against Sam's chest, ignoring her soft breasts, just wanting her off me. I was with a girl, a nice girl…one who was nicer than Sam could ever hope.

"No, Sam… don't touch me." I said, my tone almost monotonous with the effort of not shouting. "Now, I think you need to leave."

"Don't tell me what to do."

"I will and I just have." I said, my anger fueling my confidence and my will to die, apparently. I was standing up to Sam, and for once, it might just end with my death. Instead of saying anything though, Sam ducked her head and left. She just slunk into the shadows, her tail tucked between her legs as I just took the top rank as Alpha dog. With a smile I returned to Valerie.

"And then my mom started yelling about bees. And I told her about the wasps and we both just laughed." Valerie intoned with a great grin on her face. She hadn't even realized I was gone, I noticed as I walked back in on the tail end of her story. I laughed with her.

Eventually it was late, and I took her home. She lived not far from the Bushwell so I dropped her home on my way to mine—I would have taken her home anyway. "Good Night." I told her.

"Night… I had a lot of fun. We have to do this again." She returned. Then she darted forward, pecking my cheek with a smile. I didn't settle though, I lunged forward and caught her lips in mine for a few moments before breaking away. "_Wow._" She murmured.

"We _will_ have to do this again." I told her as she walked into her house. All I could think of was the lack of fireworks and how without the sparks, it wasn't as great. The kiss was just skin on skin, nothing deep or wonderful. The stomachache that bubbled up in my gut wasn't wonderful either. And I walked home in silent thought.

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><p><strong>AN - **Ohhh, cheating, betrayl and murder...what a delicious chapter. Jk. I wrote the same thing you read, and this chapter only featured the murder. So don't worry, your memory isn't failing you, I am. XD I might have a chapter up this weekend but I will definitely have one for you Monday or Tuesday. And remember the twice a week update schedule I have for you guys. Night! :)


	11. iLie Some More

**A/N - **This chapter originally wasn't going to be up until tomorrow but I got an early jump on it. So enjoy. disclaimer: I don't own.

And I'd like to give a shoutout to my buddy **ZenNoMai_. _**He is an amazing author and has been sure to comment on EVERY single one of the chapters in this story. I can't thank him enough. You should be sure to check out some of his work.

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><p>Valerie was great. She always found me early in the morning at school and brought me cookies or brownies or even ham sandwiches but since I wasn't a fan of ham, I always passed them onto Sam. Don't think that means I've forgiven that blond deviant yet for kissing me <em>on my date!<em>

Carly kept asking why I wasn't talk to Sam but I ignored her questions because the truth would involve admitting that Sam and I kept something from her…and we all knew how Carly feels about lying. She would never talk to us again but none of this was my fault really. I just decided to push all that down and worry about my amazing girlfriend.

"Hey, Freddie," Valerie smiled, finding me at my locker. She gave me a peck on the cheek and passed me a small, paper bag. I glanced inside…ham. I involuntarily looked around the hall for Sam. "Looking for someone?"

"No. Well, actually I need to get the history notes from Jeremy." I lied. Why did I lie? I didn't want Valerie to know that I didn't like ham or that I was giving it all to Sam. For some reason, my mind was being irrational in thinking that if she found out about the ham sandwiches, she would find out about _everything_.

"Oh, okay. Well, there's Jen. I've got to talk to her about our girl's night this Friday." Valerie smiled and walked over to where her blue-haired friend stood. Jen was a pretty tough girl, I'll admit but never like Sam. Jen had what you called manners. Sam didn't know what a napkin was. I shook thoughts out of my head of the blond-haired demon.

Just then, as if on cue, Sam was there, bobbing up and down on the balls of her feet, knowing that the sandwich in my hand was going to be passed onto her. I dejectedly passed it to her. "I'm still not happy with you." I told her sternly and she nodded at me, probably not hearing me over her snack.

"Thanks, Benson." She said, landing a hard punch on my upper arm. I groaned and turned away from her only to come face-to-face with Valerie. I turned to make sure Sam was gone and when I flicked my eyes back to the brunette, she looked kind of sad.

"Why do you give away my sandwiches?" She said, her voice barely above a whisper. I tried to look everywhere but at her downcast face.

"To be honest, Val, I don't like ham."

"Oh, you should have just said so. Do you like turkey?" She asked, reaching into her backpack and pulling out another sandwich. She held it out to me.

"I can't take your lunch," I said with a weak smile.

"No, it's fine. I hate turkey. Plus, I have money for a Sloppy Joe today." She smiled and I reluctantly took the sandwich though I was grateful. I like turkey but not Sloppy Joes. I opened it up, taking a bite. "You know, I didn't realize you were friends with Sam still."

"Yeah, of course, we still do iCarly every Tuesday. Did you see our web cast last night?" I asked, starting to ramble in my inherent nervousness.

"Yeah, but you two haven't really don't seem that close anymore."

"Oh…yeah, something happened." I quickly said, thinking of a way to change the subject.

"What?" _Dang._

"She…um…called my mom and told her that I had chlamydia." I lied…again. A small awkward silence drifted between us.

"Um… well, do you?" She asked slowly.

"NO!" I cried and she jumped back a bit. "And how would she know?" I laughed, pulling her to me, draping my arm around her waist.

"I don't know. I thought before you asked me that you two were dating." She said with a smirk before nuzzling her head into my shoulder.

"Ew…no. I mean, Sam is cool and all but I am not a masochist and all she ever does is bully me." I smirked at her and she smiled back. "Anyway, I have to get to class." I unwound myself from her and headed to English.

I caught Sam glaring at me when I went around the corner. Her arms were crossed over her chest. She heard everything, I knew from the look in her eyes but I said nothing and hurried past her. "Ew…no." I heard her hiss and knew I'd pay dearly for my words.

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><p>English seemed to slink by at one mile an hour. Ms. Briggs stood at the board, writing something out that I wasn't paying attention to. I caught Sam watching me out of the corner of my eye and knew she was planning a way to hurt me. I just hoped she punched me and got it over with and no humiliated me or kiss me in front of Valerie or something. Panic fluttered in my throat, causing me to cough loudly.<p>

"Go and get a drink of water, Freddie." Ms. Briggs suddenly snapped, startling me and I stood and fled the classroom. I ran to the water fountain, splashing my face and taking get gulps of water to calm my nerves. A boy my age shouldn't have to deal with two beautiful, strong girls like Sam and Valerie.

"Hey, Freddie." I jumped and whirled to find Carly standing there looking surprise at my reaction. I smiled weakly at her. "You okay?" She asked, stepping forward and putting a hand on my arm.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." I said, grateful that it wasn't the unruly blond.

"Are you jumpy about Sam?" She whispered and I felt my blood run cold. What did she know?

"What do you know?" I gulped.

"Well, what Sam told me… That you played a prank on her—which was stupid by the way, unless you wanted a death wish—and that now she is going to get you back."

I sighed, a little heavily earning a confused look from Carly. "I thought maybe you were in on it… but you wouldn't have told me this if you were."

We both stood there a moment, looking around the hall. I was just about to say bye and go back to class when Carly said, "You know that girl's night that Valerie is having? She invited me and Sam to go."

"What? Why?" I said a little quickly.

"She just said it'd be a good way to get to know your friends." Carly said. "I think its sweet. And you're lucky that she doesn't seem the jealous type or she might not like you being friends with me and Sam."

"I guess I am too because I would dump her before you." I told her reassuringly.

"What about Sam?"

"What about her?" I said. "I am not friends with that _thing._"

"Freddie…"

"No, she is mean to me and just works to make my life hard." I told her exasperatedly. "I've got to get back to class."

Like before though when I turned the corner, there was Sam with her arms crossed and a vicious snarl on her face. "_Thing_, eh, Benson?" She scoffed. "You didn't seem to think that when you were sticking your tongue down my throat."

I leaned around the corner, relieved to see Carly gone. "Well, what else can I call you? You're not my friend, you're definitely not my best friend or my girlfriend. How's co-worker?" I told her. I know I was being harsh but these past few days were spent distancing myself from her and now she was all up on me, licking her lips. I stepped back. "And like I told Carly, I have to get back to class."

It was just déjà vu again—me walking away from Sam while she looked after me dangerously. I frowned and walked faster, glad for once to be back in Ms. Briggs class.

* * *

><p>Tonight was Valerie's little girl's night. Carly and Sam were going along with Jen and Carole to Valerie's house for movies, games and a sleepover. I could only hope that Sam would eat all the food in the fridge and fall into a food-induced coma instead of being rude and obnoxious or spilling the beans about our kissing and that kiss she forced on me on my first day.<p>

I stepped into the hallway, as Carly was just getting ready to leave. "Carly, hey…can I talk to you really quick?"

"Yeah, what's up Freddie?" She asked, flashing me that sweet smile that might of once made me melt but now I just returned.

"Sam hinted earlier that she was going to get back at me by telling Valerie some outrageous lies. I don't know what Sam has in mind but could you keep an eye on her for me?" Another lie. How many was that? I think about twenty-two or maybe twenty-three. Then I began to wonder if I was the only one keeping count or at least trying to.

"Of course, I'll make sure that she isn't embarrassing in front of your girlfriend." She smirked, leaned in and gave me a peck on the cheek before hoisting her bag up and leaving. "Later, Freddie."

Spencer came out a minute later carrying his car keys. He smiled at me standing there in the hall and I gave him a small wave. As he walked away I noticed the paint coating his back. It was pink and green and orange, and I wondered what he was doing. I debated picking the lock to the Shay apartment to see what he was doing, as Sam had taught me but I decided against doing anything Sam taught me, and went into my apartment.

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><p>The next morning at school, I stood by my locker chewing my nails, a gross habit that I had taken up recently. I spotted Valerie storming up to me. She said nothing, just slammed her lips into mine, giving me the most passionate kiss we shared. When she pulled away I felt a little breathless and looked at her confused.<p>

A few feet behind her stood Sam, once again crossing her arms—was that just the natural position her arms took when she was upset or angry? I look back at Valerie who followed my eyes to Sam. "Your mine, Freddie." She told me loudly, tucking her head under my chin and folding her arms around my middle.

I gently pulled away and led her a few feet out of Sam's hearing range. "What happened?"

"Sam admitted to kissing only one guy last night at Truth or Dare and it was you. And I was afraid that maybe she still liked you, considering she said she liked it. Is that why you are acting all strange around her?" Valerie asked quietly.

"No… no, Valerie. The last time I kissed Sam was when we first met and well, that was about a year and a half ago. And the way she treats me, I don't think she likes me at all."

"Well, she said it was just before you and I started dating."

"Bullshit," I hissed and realized that, that was the second time I swore. The first time was also about Sam but that time I was calling her a _bitch_. "She just said that to get back at me about a prank."

"Oh…well, I'm glad to hear that." She smiled at me, completely believing every word that came out of my mouth. I felt a twinge of guilt that was quickly smothered by my realization that she would probably dump me if she found out that I lied to cover up everything that happened between Sam and me.

If I told her the truth now, she'd never trust me again, and with good reason. I mean, I wasn't cheating on her but with all my recent lies, I wouldn't be surprised at all. I should have told the truth from the start, and while the hole I dug myself was pretty deep, there was no way to get back up and the best thing to do was to keep digging.

"I'll talk to you later, Freddie." Valerie smiled at me, gave me a peck on the cheek and hurried off. I noticed her give Sam a dark look as she passed.

Sam stormed up to me as soon a Valerie rounded the corner, rather considerate of the rowdy blond. "What lies have you been telling her?"

"What are you talking about?" I asked back.

"When we were talking last night, it sounded to me like all you've told that girl was lies and that is no way to start a relationship with anyone. The only person you're truly being honest with is me."

"So you're saying I should date you?" I ventured and she gave me a grimace. "And who are you to be giving lessons on morality?" I told her and her eyes went wide in anger.

"Shut up, Benson." She snarled, and I could her breath on my lips as she leaned in close. I wanted to back away but she'd she that as weakness. Instead I pushed her away from me, causing her to stumble.

Just then the bell rang, signaling the next class and the hallway immediately cleared. Sam looked around a moment before rushing up to me and pressing her lips to mine. I pulled away, glaring at her but generally speechless. "You're the biggest idiot, I know Freddork and the worst liar. Soon you're going to get caught up in your lies and find yourself all alone."

"I won't be alone, because I'm going to pull you down with me." I spat at her.

Then I felt the pain as her knee connected with my groin. I cried out and fell to my knees. She bent down to my face as I gritted my teeth in pain. "Well, I'm not down there with you, are I? …Just another lie from Fredward Benson." And she stalked off.

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><p><strong>AN - **Poor Freddie, Sam is pissed at him. And that boy is going to get caught up in his lies sooner or later. And don't worry, I won't forget to include that part about Valerie just using Freddie...I just haven't gotten there yet.

And due to this early update, I may or may not update tomorrow. I'll have an update by Thursday, I promise.


	12. iUsed you

**A/N **- Wow, I am a super updater. XD I promised another chapter Thursday, and here I am posting one at 8:00 Monday night. Thanks to everyone who has read and review, and another thanks to those who have stuck with the story from the start. Seriously, I appreciate guys.

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><p>"Shut up, Sam." I hissed at the blond and Carly looked at me in surprise. I was usually pretty civil to Sam but the girl was just starting to piss me off. Not only did she antagonize me near constantly, she courteously extended the same treatment to Valerie. How dare she?<p>

"What? It's true," Sam looked at me incredulously. "Valerie totally has a ham-shaped butt."

"Sam...why are you checking out Freddie's girlfriend?" Carly muttered, exasperated at our little fights. What Carly didn't know that we were taming our fights because she was around. If we were alone, like we had been avoiding for the past week or so since Sam's confrontation of me, we would be shouting and threatening to get violent.

"She's not unattractive exactly, like Benson here." Sam admitted, taking another of Carly's French fries. We both stared at Sam with shocked expressions. It was just so out of character for her.

"I'll be right back," Carly said slowly before hurrying back up to the counter to grab another fork since Sam used hers to scratch the bottom of her feet. Speaking of her bare feet, did I fail to mention that they were perched perilously in my lap? I kept shoving her off but she kept putting her feet back up. I figured that she liked the placement because if I pissed her off, she could easily kick me.

"At least I didn't lie." Sam said suddenly.

"What?"

"About thinking your girlfriend is good looking." Sam said, "And before you say that you've never lied about Valerie's looks, I can't trust your word... You're a liar."

"That's hardly fair, Sam." I began but I saw Valerie walking over.

"What's not fair?" She chirped, smiling.

"Using me as a foot rest," I told Valerie, shoving Sam's feet off me.

"You just can't stop can you, Benson?" Sam said snidely drawing Valerie's attention.

"Stop what?" Valerie asked and I wanted to groan.

"Lying to you about everything." Sam said, standing and glaring at me. "He has hardly said one honest word to you since you two started dating. He kissed me on your first date... You just weren't paying attention."

I was gaping at Sam in shock and Valerie look stricken. Tears were welling up in her eyes. I stood in anger. Why did Sam have to ruin this for me? She was the goddamn reason I was lying in the first place! And what did she hope to get out of causing my girlfriend to break up with me?

"Who's lying now? You kissed me!" I said incredulously and a little too loudly. I was drawing a crowd now. Valerie sniffled beside me. I turned to her. "It's not what it sounds like... That thing wants to sabotage what we have because she is_ jealous_." At that point Valerie turned and fled.

"See, all girls run from you," Sam said with a rancorous laugh. At that point, Carly cams back over, looking at the crowd in confusion. I looked at the brunette-just another girl to run off feeling betrayed. And it was all because of Sam.

Sam was still laughing and didn't see me approaching her. She didn't see me raise my fist but the crowd did. There was a gasp that passed around the crowd. Sam paused in confusion but my fist smashed into her nose, sending her sprawling onto the ground. She clutched her face groaning.

An uproar went up. Some were cheering that I hit Sam. A few were shouting for Sam to hit me back, and almost everyone was yelling at me for hitting a girl. I turned to see Carly silent and watching me like she didn't know who I was. She scooted past me, her face expressionless.

I watched the brunette crouch next to Sam and take her hands off her face too see the damage. That's when it hit me what I had done, and like the nerd that I was, I fled.

* * *

><p>I found Valerie sitting in an abandoned hallway. She wasn't crying anymore but she was sitting with her back to the lockers, her head tilted backwards against them. I moved next to her, sitting on the ground with her and glancing at her closed eyes. "Freddie," She whispered softly, never looking at me. "I-."<p>

I unceremoniously cut her off. "Before you break up with me, let me talk." I began. "Sam grabbed me and kissed me on our first date when we were at the park. I didn't tell you because I didn't think you'd understand but I should have put more faith in you. Yet, I guess there was another reason I didn't tell you..."

"You liked it more than when you kissed me," Valerie finished softly.

"What do you think it means?" I asked softly. We both frowned in thought.

"That I'm not the girl for you." She replied, looking down at my hand and she reached down to take my hand. "But I could have told you that from the start."

"Huh?" I gaped at her like an idiot.

"I used you," She mumbled and I had to strain to hear her. God, why didn't I see this one coming? Oh, because I was all caught up in Sam drama, or maybe Valerie was just a good a liar as I seemed to be. "I thought you were cute and when you asked me out, I was just so excited to finally be asked by someone that I just said yes but to be honest I never really did like you. I like Jen." She finished miserably.

"Jen... Your best friend?" I knew who Jen was. She was a tall, dark skinned girl with the prettiest golden eyes and long hair that she dyed a bright blue. Her wardrobe usually consisted of black on black with bright colored accessories. The girl was considered odd but she was nice enough. I was taken far off guard. "So you never liked me?" She hung her head and sighed.

"I'm sorry but don't think I went out with you to make her jealous... It's just, I don't want to be a lesbian." She said, trying to cover her soft sob with a cough. "But it was wrong to pretend like that... And I understand if you hate me."

"I don't hate you, Valerie," I said a bit sadly. I really thought she liked me and while we were both putting on a charade, to find out that she kind of used me was a blow to my self-esteem. "You should be who you are... Not who you think you should be. And maybe you don't just like girls, maybe it's just Jen."

She sniffled. "Thanks Freddie for being so understanding." She gave me a half-hug before standing up. "I'm going to go find Jen. Good luck, Freddie."

"With what?" I asked her retreating form.

She paused and looked back at me. " Life. School." She looked thoughtful a moment. "_Sam_." She said the last one with a kind of finality before disappearing.

I groaned and stood myself. Now I'd have to go find Sam and hope she doesn't kill me. I'd be lucky only to have her break all my limbs. I probably broke her nose and I'd most likely be blacklisted for punching a girl.

I found Carly before Sam though, and Carly looked angrily at me. She opened her mouth, about to chew me out but Principle Franklin came over the loud speaker. "Freddie Benson to the principle's office."

I glanced at Carly and said, "Sorry. We'll have to do this later."

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><p><strong>AN - **Valerie used Freddie alright but not in the way you thought! Muahaha. And I really hope you like this chapter because what happened with Valerie happened to me, so it's kind of personal. I liked this girl and I dated this guy for like two years to hide it. I mean, I thought I liked him but never really did. It was terrible and not handled with as much grace as it was between Sam and Freddie. So please read and review.


	13. iGo to Find Sam

**A/N - **Once again I am super-updater, and I hope you guys appreciate the extremely early update. Don't expect another, though, until Thursday.

Now, I love and hate this chapter but overall I love the interactions between the characters. And I hope you guys do as well.

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><p>I had detention for the next three weeks, two times a week. Principle Franklin said I would have had more if it weren't for the fact that he had no proof I really hit Sam. Apparently she fled the premises after I hit her and so Principle Franklin heard of it from another student—I couldn't help but think it was Carly and looking at her smug expression from across the room, I was almost sure it was her.<p>

I forced back the angry words I wanted to direct at her to explain why I did it—truthfully I wasn't sure why I did it—and paid attention to the lesson. Yet, my mind couldn't stop drifting back to Sam and how she wasn't in school after yesterday, and how I couldn't sleep last night. Was it because I was afraid that she was coming for me in the dark or was it guilt?

I had kept turning to the window, hoping silently for her to appear so I could apologize and make amends, but another part of me never wanted to see her standing there again. I hit her for a reason, I realized and while it seemed grossly inappropriate for me to hit a girl, it wasn't a girl I hit… it was Sam.

I'm not saying Sam is somehow _not _a girl but Sam doesn't behave like most girls. If she can kick, hit and generally hurt me, me punching her once seemed fair. And I had already vowed never to do it again. I was Freddie Benson, and like I said before, I don't just go around punching people.

Even with these thoughts in my head, Carly still cornered me after class, along with a few onlookers. She looked pissed too. "Freddie Benson! I cannot believe you'd hit Sam!"

"She always hits me," I returned just as deprecating.

"Yes but Sam is a girl." A few of the kids gathered around gave a curt nod in agreement with her words.

"So?"

"You can't just go around hitting girls, Freddie! It's just not right!" Carly cried, her tone strong but her eyes welling up with tears. There was the guilt that I seemed to be lacking before but it wasn't for hitting Sam but for making Carly so upset—and I silently blamed Sam for that as well.

"That is a double standard, Carly, and you know it!" I snapped viciously and she stepped back. That actually pissed me off. I know I hit Sam but that doesn't mean I'm going to swing at everyone who antagonizes me. "If she can hit me _all_ the time, I should be able to retaliate without retribution or people who don't even get what the hell is going on getting up in my face and screaming about shit they don't even understand!"

Carly snapped then, stepping forward and smacking me across the face. She then turned and ran off, her sobs echoing off the lockers ominously. The few kids who stuck around after her departure, glared at me. Among them was Gibby but he just looked at me without expression.

"I don't like to see Carly cry, but I get where you are coming from Freddie," Gibby offered softly, patting my arm. I offered him a weak smile but I could feel my cheek burning slightly where Carly's hand hit me. "I wish I had the guts to hit Sam, because after al she has put us through, it's time to level the playing field." He took in a shuddering breath. "I'm going to go find Carly now."

I watched Gibby walk off and I wondered at his words. He was right… the playing field needed to be leveled. Sam couldn't do all the crap she does to everyone and never expect anyone _not_ to hit back. If I did half the stuff that feisty blond did, I would expect to be jumped after school.

Still, I earned a few choice glares as I walked down the hall. Then I decided something right then and there. There was only one person's whose opinion mattered to me, and she was probably at home, nursing a broken nose. So even though it was fourth period with two more classes to go, I just walked out and directed my feet towards the west side of town and Sam Puckett's apartment. Either I was stupid beyond belief or smart for most likely going to throw myself at the blonde's mercy.

* * *

><p>Sam didn't even answer when I pressed the buzzer. I heard a loud amount of static and then, "Who the hell is it? I was <em>sleeping<em>." The woman croaked and she sounded groggy and much older than Sam. I figured it must have been her mom.

"Sorry, Ms. Puckett, I am looking for Sam." I told her.

There was a pause. "Call me Pam… Miss just makes me sound old." She scolded and I literally flinched at the sound of her voice. "And Sam isn't here. She said something about a park. I don't know. Now, get lost."

I turned away from the speaker dejectedly. Where was Sam? My luck she had gone to school, and here I was at her apartment building. I sighed and plopped down on the step, dropping my head into my lap. "OFF MY PORCH!" The speaker suddenly screamed at me with a loud amount of static, and I stumbled away to the sideway.

I started walking aimlessly. I wasn't sure if I should go back to school, or go home or maybe just stop right where I was and sit down. It seemed lately that I had no clue what to do. Just as I decided to head to the Groovy Smoothie, I bumped into someone.

I looked up at her and smiled faintly, not sure what to say. I hadn't expected to find her just wandering the sideway but I still was slightly glad to see her. "What are you doing here? And why aren't you in school."

"Well, Freddie, I could ask you the same thing," Valerie replied, smirking and giving me a quick hug. It seemed like just yesterday—in fact, it was just yesterday we broke up. Then I remembered everything that happened and I felt my face fall. "What's the matter?"

"I p-punched Sam and now I don't know what to do. I went to her house-." I indicated her apartment with a twitch of my shoulders. "But she wasn't home. Her mom said she was at some park. I don't know where she is but even if I did, what would I say to her?"

Valerie looked thoughtful a moment. "I would tell her the truth…someone deserves it for once." Her tone was void of emotion but I could just imagine the bitterness probably lurking underneath the surface. I felt my cheeks redden with the shame of what I did to the poor girl—there wasn't too much shame though, she had been in love with her best friend, not me.

"Thanks," Was all I could muster up. She gave me a half-smile and walked away. I wondered what she was doing out of school but decided it didn't matter—what did matter was that she seemed to be in the right place at the right time to send me in the right direction.

I pulled out my phone and tried texting Sam: **Hey, where are you?**

**At the corner of Bethany and Colwell. **The reply was immediate.

I blinked at the screen, surprised that she even bothered texting me back. I wanted to stop and think about what I was going to say to her but I just turned on my heel and shot off towards where she told me. I don't always have the best plans.

I did find Sam where she told me but I couldn't believe my eyes. Her usually luscious, gold hair hung wet and limp around her head as if she just stepped out of the shower, and she wore the same clothes as she had on yesterday. Her sneakers sat on the sidewalk next to her and her bare toes stuck out in the street but not far enough to be dangerous. Across her nose was a bandage and around her eyes were large, purple bruises… the byproduct of a broken nose. The thing that really shocked me though, was the cigarette that she puffed nonchalantly as she watched me approach with cold eyes.

"Sam…you look… tired." I told her. I almost said _awful_ but that just didn't seem appropriate.

"Well, I didn't exactly sleep," She admitted shallowly, allowing her droopy eyelids to flutter shut for a moment before turning to look at me.

"And why are you smoking?" I asked. I wasn't sure what to say so words just seemed to spill out of my mouth. "…what happened to you?"

"Benson, if you are trying to ask why I look like shit, just come out and say it," Sam smirked almost playfully but the expression was weak as if exhaustion got in the way. "Because I know I do."

I leaned over and brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes and she smiled at me almost apologetically. "You don't, Sam." I told her softly. I was surprised, almost shell-shocked at the fact that I wasn't dead yet. "You look beautiful as ever."

She just shot me a _did-you-really-just-say-that _look, but she made no comment. She hesitated and then said, "That was brave of you, Freddork. I'm impressed."

"What was brave?"

"You hitting me." She deadpanned as if it were the most obvious answer in the world and her expression made me scoot away, in case she decided to throw a punch. "I'm not going to hurt you. Like I said, I'm impressed. I didn't know you had it in you."

"Um…thanks?" I mumbled.

"Don't think I won't make up for it though with all my regular beatings." She warned, dragging on the cigarette and blowing all the smoke in my face. I coughed and sputtered.

"Please don't do that." I told her and she shot a deadly stare. I said nothing more about it. "Um, so are we cool?"

"Yeah…well, at least I'm cool. You're still a nub." Sam waggled her eyebrows at me but winced as if her black eyes hurt.

Silence fell over us for a few moments. Sam blew a few smoke rings, which I waved away with my hand. Some guy threw a few pennies at our feet as if we were homeless. Sam snorted at him, and I just smirked. Then Sam spoke again.

"I didn't go home last night." Sam started suddenly and I looked at her, confused. "I slept in a park."

"Why?" I asked, curious as to why and why she was even telling me.  
>"Because I felt guilty." She said quietly and I had to strain to hear her.<p>

"About what?"

"Doing that to you… the telling Valerie like that. I guess I was just… what is the word I am looking for?" She smudged her cigarette in the gutter and tossed it aside. "Jealous?" She said it almost like a question.

"Jealous of what?" I asked carefully.

"Her… being with you." She said in a whisper as she scooted up next to me. She gently lifted her feet into my lap and snuggled her head into my shoulder. I didn't know what to do—like usual—so I draped my arm around her, pulling her closer.

"So what does this mean?" I asked her, stroking her stringy, dirty hair.

"That you are very warm and I should have brought a jacket…"

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><p><strong>AN - **I love, love, love that last line. XD I do that to my girlfriend all the time, she'll ask me a deep and meaningful question and I'll answer with something completely irrelevant and obviously not the answer she was looking for. XD She hates me for you, and you guys probably do too. You'll have to see what happens next when I update on Thursday. :D R&R!


	14. iTell My Secret

**A/N – **Ugh, this update is so late, I'm going to sleep now. I wanted to update earlier but at least I updated today because I will update next Tuesday. Hope this tides you over until then.

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><p>The next few days were strained among us iCarlys. Sam's kissing and attacking of me stopped for the most part, though occasionally she would push me off the couch so she could have her favorite spot or call me a nasty name because I took the last piece of cake. Even Carly, who I often found shooting daggers at me with her eyes, didn't hit or yell like she looked like she wanted to. I wasn't sure what Sam said to the brunette, but after Carly hit me, she didn't attack me again or talk to me even.<p>

iCarly was still going fine because all the animosity was between the girls and me. You see, the two hosts were as close as ever and so everything ran smoothly.

Then everything went wrong again. First Carly seemed to be keeping a secret. While she hardly talked to me, it was obvious that she was quieter than usual. A few times Sam and I caught her texting some mysterious person or lying about where'd she been.

And as if to add insult to injury, all my equipment started going all wonky. I couldn't understand what was going on or why but I knew something or someone was messing with my camera.

"Benson, why the hell is the screen doing that?" Sam said through clenched teeth when the little TV we used to show clips started tilting up and down, and retracting and moving outward again. Static filled the room and screen and droned out almost everything else.

"It's not me," I said quickly which earned me a glare from Carly as if I was doing it and simply lying. Maybe she thought I was trying to get revenge but why would I sabotage iCarly? Without the show I didn't have anything but boring old AV club and my crazy mom.

Suddenly the screen turned off and stopped working as if a switch had shut it down. It wasn't a switch though; it was a plug that Sam pulled.

"Our tech-monkey thinks he is real intelligent," Sam began in a mockingly patronizing tone. "But he can't use a plug." She and Carly burst out laughing almost insanely and I pressed random dancing to get them to stop.

As they bounced around the room, dancing I analyzed the system, trying to find out why the screen went berserk. I thought it might have been a virus but I found that another computer had hacked my laptop and thus could literally control the iCarly studio.

"Who could do that?" I asked after the show was over and I explained what went wrong. "Who _would_ do that?"

Carly still looked skeptical but said, "They'd have to understand computers really well."

"And have a vendetta out for iCarly." Sam added softly.

And as if a telepathic train of thought passed through all our brains simultaneously, we all hissed "Nevel". And for a moment everything seemed back to normal between us.

But then Carly had to go and ruin it. "Freddie knows computers well too."

"Hey, don't try to blame me. I don't have a vendetta out for iCarly." I said, rightly offended.

"Yeah, but you have it out for me." She said softly and sadly as if some victim of everything. That

"No-." I began.

"Carly don't be ridiculous," Sam interrupted and I glanced at her flabbergasted. "Why would Freddork over there do this? I'm sure he could do worse than screw around with a TV set."

"Oh, just take his side, Sam! Honestly, I wonder how after all that happened-." Carly screamed, her face flushed with misplaced anger.

"I'm not taking his side! He is our best friend and I say we trust him." Sam said and I felt a rush of gratitude towards her.

"You are just saying that because you love him," Carly snapped venomously and a few shimmery tears shone in the corners of her eyes. "And he is not my best friend."

And I felt her words right in my chest, like a punch or maybe a stab…

You would have thought I had hit Carly the way she was acting. She could get irrational but this was worse than ever before and the fact it was directed at me hurt. And I wasn't her best friend anymore? That almost made me want to cry—not for what I lost but what we once had but isn't that was usually causes tears?

"I'm going to take a shower," She said suddenly and disappeared, wiping her eyes on her sleeves. I knew what that meant, and I felt my breath catch in my throat but this wasn't my fault. I didn't do anything wrong.

"Thanks Sam," I said quietly and she gave me a small lopsided smile but I quickly faded again.

"It really isn't you right?" She asked, almost sounding afraid as if I'd hit her again.

"What happened to trusting me because I was your best friend?" My tone was a bit cruel and I could hear the mock in the undertones but Sam didn't really seem to notice.

"Nothing...I was just making sure. Sorry," she told me so apologetically I felt instantly bad... As was usual.

"Don't apologize, Sam." I told her, walking up to her and enveloping her in a hug. She snaked her arms around my waist, firm but not tightly.

Her lips found mine for a split moment and it was like all our problems faded away, and then I was left with nothing but cold air where Sam's warm lips had been seconds before.

"I'm going to go check on Carly." Sam sighed, her face looking grieved as if she just lost a family member or someone close to her. I felt my heart constrict—that look wasn't my fault, was it? "I suggest you leave." Her tone was final but not harsh.

As I left I spotted Sam pull a cigarette out of her pocket and while I should have wondered where she was going to smoke it or if Carly knew or why she only appeared to have one, I simply wondered how much you'd have to smoke before it would kill you.

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><p>Sam showed up at my door, carrying something with her. It was a cord and I gave her an odd look when I opened up the door. I wondered if she planned to tie me up with it or something. "Nevel's internet connection," was all she told me as she pressed past me and into the living room. "I just went over there, told him to stop the bullshit and took this." She tossed it on the table like a trophy.<p>

"You are amazing." I laughed at her gently and closed the door before joining her on the couch. "Now, why are you here?"

"Carly ran out of ham," She told me with a weak smile and pushed herself off the couch. "And she went out." She threw over her shoulder. I watched her blond hair disappear into the kitchen, and I followed, almost hoping that what happened last time would happen again. I loved those few precious moments with the dangerous blond where our fighting and kissing and all our troubles faded away.

"I don't like ham, remember?" I informed her softly and she scoffed with irritation. "My mom doesn't like it either."

"What about your dad?" Her tone was bland as if it she were just asking about the weather but I felt my knees buckle when I heard those words. We were careful to never talk about _him_ in this house.

"I don't know. Do they have ham in prison?" I asked with a light tone, trying not to give in to the pain that was locked in the back of my mind.

"Your dad's in prison?" Sam gapped at me with shock and something akin to admiration. I knew it was just her instinctual reaction. "I just thought he worked a lot."

"Well that is what usually happens to men w-who…" My words died in my throat and I gripped the counter behind me as I felt as if I would fall to the ground. There was a reason I never talked about anything that had to do with my father.

Sam stepped forward and did a very un-Sam-like thing; she put her hand on my shoulder reassured. Actually I shouldn't try to characterize Sam because she was always doing things that went against her meat-eating, abusive nature. I couldn't finish my sentence after that because tears choked up my throat.

"You don't have to tell me." She offered softly and I met her eyes. Something made me want to tell her.

"I wasn't planned." I told her slowly, testing the waters and I found the words flowing as if they wanted to burst from me.

"So you were an accident?" She asked in a tone that made me think that she was one too. I didn't look up that time.

"Not exactly… my dad… well, my mom didn't consent." I told her, and this time when I looked up, I found Sam not looking at me. Sometimes I felt a rush of love for the girl—that last thing I had wanted to see was sympathy or even pity in her face but I didn't want to see disgust either. Her beautiful, golden locks soothed me though.

My mom hid that from me for years, at least until I got a letter from the Washington State Penitentiary. When I was five, well, he did what he did to my mom again but to another girl, and this time he got arrested. When he did it to my mom, she said nothing because even with what he did, he supported her and me. I know that sounds like I am defending him, but it wasn't like he was the nicest father because he wasn't.

"Oh… I'm sorry, Freddie," Sam said, using my name for once and I didn't want to cry anymore. So I wiped my tears away and stood straighter. I gently shrugged Sam's hand off my shoulder—the pity party was over and Sam realized it.  
>"Let's go somewhere." I said, taking her hand in mine.<p>

"Where?" She asked, still reeling from what I told her.

"I don't know where but I need you in case it's cold." I smirked at her, bringing back the words she told me a few days ago when I found her on the corner of the street, smelling of smoke and two-day old sweat.

"Hey, maybe we can catch a peek at Carly and her new boyfriend," Sam smiled, entwining her fingers with mine as we walked out of my apartment.

"Really?" I said with a small smirk.

"Yeah, I overheard her on the phone. She went to meet him at the Groovy Smoothie." She smirked. "And you won't believe who it is!"

"Who is it?" And Sam only grinned wider.

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><p><strong>AN **– That wasn't the greatest chapter but it is important for the plot in the next few chapters. And don't you feel bad for Freddie? I am just terrible to the characters in my stories, I am worst to my own characters in my own stories. XD Anyway, please read and review.


	15. iDefine Irony

**A/N – **I think its time that I start deviating further away from the plotline of iCarly. I mean I will still use iKiss, iMust Have Locker239, iMake Sam Girlier, iThink They Kissed, iMove Out, iSpeed Date and iOMG, but beyond that I will be taking my own courses of actions.

A few quick shout-outs for those who keep reviewing and urging me to write more: **seddieSUPERFAN101, Julefor, mekaylawrotethis, luktheduke **and **alex02**. (Sorry if you think you deserve a shout-out but I missed you).

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><p>GIBBY! It was Gibby. As Sam and I stood, looking through the door into the Groovy Smoothie, we could see Carly and Gibby sitting at the table at the far end of the restaurant. Carly was curling a strand of hair around her finger and giggling. I couldn't believe it. Carly always did seem more tolerant of Gibby than Sam but then again Sam wasn't exactly tolerant of anyone.<p>

"Well at least she isn't accusing me of anything right now." I joked lightly but Sam didn't laugh. She did squeeze my hand though. "So what are we going to do?" I asked her, smiling and pulling her away from the doorway of the restaurant before T-Bo could see us and ask us to buy fish on a stick or apples on a stick.

"I don't know. I am getting a little hungry." Sam told me that gleam coming into her eye—the same one that always appeared when she was hungry and thinking of food. She pulled her hand from mine and my palm suddenly felt cold in the air. It wasn't that it was cold but without her sudden pressure, it was odd.

"Well, we can go to Quick Mart and get you some ham." I offered, waving my wallet at her. Sam snatched it from me though and pulled it open. I had twenty-five dollars in there and a gift certificate to that Chinese buffet downtown.

"No, we're going here." She had my gift certificate and I grimaced at her. She spun on her heel and bounced away, her blond curls swaying behind her. She looked back at me motioning to come. When I didn't follow, she bounced up to me and pulled at my hand.

"B-but I was going to use that for-." I began as I stumbled behind her.

"For what? Carly?" Sam sneered, bringing on a fresh wave of irritation for the girl. "Face it, Benson. She'll _never _love you."

"Thank you for those loving and encouraging words, Sam but I have told you before that I don't like her anymore." I told her scathingly. She frowned.

"You're not falling in love with me, right?" She asked again.

"Have I ever broken a promise?" I asked her as we got to the buffet. She let go of my hand and turned to look at me as if looking to see if I tried to lie which I wouldn't because I planned to keep my promise.

"No but you only made one and only time will tell if you can keep it." Sam winked at me and disappeared into the restaurant.

Smirking I followed her in, watching her smile at the long buffet tables filled with egg rolls, slices of pizza, burgers, hot dogs, lobster, sushi, pork, pieces of ham and various Chinese food. I wondered why a Chinese restaurant had food other than Chinese cuisine. Yet my mind couldn't stop drifting over to Sam. I looked over at her with a smile and realized how much I enjoyed her smile.

"One?" The girl behind the podium asked, grabbing a single menu. I looked over the waitress and noticed that she had long brown hair, bright green eyes and a large smile directed at Sam and I. She appeared to be our age. I saw indecision flickering across Sam's face. I knew she was wondering whether or not she wanted to sit with me.

I slid up behind her and leaned in. "You can't pay without me." I whispered and I saw the waitress' eyebrows shoot up but she grabbed another menu.

"Two please." Sam said, not noticing that the waitress already was ready. "But I don't _need_ you to pay, Benson. I have my own money." Sam informed me as we were shown to a booth. Sam scooted in across from me, taking a menu. "Wait…what's the menu for?"

"We have daily specials that our chef makes in the morning but doesn't put out on the buffet tables, and on the back is our drink menu. Would you like anything to drink?" The waitress asked.

"I'll take a root beer," I told her with a smile.

"Me too." Sam said, putting her menu down as if the pull of the buffet tables urged her to put it down.

"If you order all the same things I do Sam, the waitress will think we're together." I hissed at her, kicking her foot under the table. Her face twisted at me in anger or confusion, I wasn't sure, but the waitress was back putting our drink down. I returned her smile and she winked at me briefly as she sashayed away.

"Not if you don't put your eyes back in your head, Frednerd." Her eyes flashed red and I turned my gaze to the table. I didn't realize I was looking at the nice lady, but Sam apparently did.

"I wasn't-." I began but Sam's look cut me off.

"You don't know what gawking at some chick looks like?" Sam sneered. Our waitress passed again. Sam waved her over with an evil smirk on her face. I only knew that this would end badly. "Yes, can I get some of this pie?"

"Before your meal?" I saw Sam look at the waitress's nametag.

"Yes, Gina, before our meal." Sam said in a sultry tone. "Well, actually I should say _my_ meal. I don't share with that dork." She waved a hand towards me as if I was nothing more than an annoying fly buzzing about. She leaned towards Gina, and Gina leaned down to hear. I caught her say, "I didn't want to bring him but he is rather insistent. Practically cried, you know."

Gina laughed and shot me a briefly lived apologetic look but didn't make any move to leave. I noticed Sam take the pen out of Gina's apron and the girl's cheeks went red. Sam let her eyes trail over the girl's body as she jotted something down on her napkin. Passing it to the waitress, Sam smirked widely.

"Now, once I shake this piece of nub," Sam said, gesturing towards me. "I will be free to hang out. Don't be afraid to call." Sam winked and Gina walked away, grinning from ear to ear.

"What was that?" I asked, gaping at Sam. I couldn't believe she did that.

"That was me getting a date." Sam told me with a smirk but not a seductive one but an evil one. She rose and set out towards the food. I felt like I was kicked in the chest. I wanted to say something nasty to her but wasn't sure why. All I knew was that something was bothering me.

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><p>Sam and I walked home in silence. She wanted to go somewhere elsebut I wasn't in the mood. I didn't say anything though; my little adventure with Valerie made me realize that sometimes I could be an ass. And to be honest I was still waiting for Sam to get revenge on me for hitting me. Yet what just happened in the restaurant might have been some kind of revenge—Sam seriously couldn't be thinking about going out with Gina, but I wasn't sure what was going on in Sam Puckett's brain.<p>

I looked down at our intertwined hands. Was this just her way of getting her much needed physical contact or was it something more? The last few weeks did nothing to quell my ever-growing amount of questions. As one was answered, three more rose to the surface. And I was too afraid to ask any of them.

"Are you coming along to Carly's?" I asked her as we crossed the street. We were going to walk past her house but whether she went there or not was unknown yet. "Or is she still on her date?"

"Well, yeah, my mom told me to get out of the house until I clean my room." Sam said off-handedly.

"But-." I began.

"I know the irony, Benson." She snapped, cutting me off but digging her nails into my hand. I wanted to pull away but she kept her vice-like grip on me. I frowned at her.

"That's not ironic, Sam." I told her.

"Then tell me the definition of ironic." Sam told me, her expression mocking and her grin small and playful.

"It's when the opposite… well, I mean like the outcome is… and when you find yourself…" I stammered, actually unsure of the answer. "I… don't know." I admitted.

"Don't throw stones in glass houses, nub." I looked at her, never having heard that expression before. Yet it rang familiar in my ears and I wondered if I heard her use it before. "Now… I think you need to carry me."

I sighed loudly. "On my back or in my arms?"

Sam grinned at me. "Well, don't know, Benson. Do you want to feel my arms around you or see my beautiful face?" She trailed a hand up my arm and I knew whichever option I told would be a trap and bring that smug smile back on Sam's face.

"Neither then." I told her and she looked like I had hit her again. She started walking faster, leaving me behind. I groaned and came up behind her, sweeping her up into my arms. Her face was one of surprise but as I stumbled in Bushwell Plaza with her, her eyes drifted close.

I saw the elevator open and it was my mom who looked at the girl in my arms. "Why are you carrying that _thing_?" She asked.

"Sam is not a _thing._ She is my friend." I told her sternly.

"You're not dating her, right?" My mom asked, her tone fearful of my answer.

"No, Mom. I wou-."

"GET OUT OF MY LOBBY!" Lewbert screamed, coming out of his little office. My mom shot across the room and out the front door while I jumped into the elevator. I almost dropped Sam but as the doors clicked shut, I found my grip and tried to ignore my hand that was now on her butt.

"Trying to grope me?" I looked down at Sam who was watching me. I burned red and shifted my hands. Her eyes shut again. "Thanks."

"For?"

"Sticking up for me." And with that she leaned up, almost falling but I had a good grip on her. Her lips met mine in a small brush but something made me cup my hand around the back of her neck and kissed her more deeply. Her teeth clacked against mine as we fought for dominance with our tongues.

We broke apart, breathing heavily. "What will you do if that waitress calls?"

"Get a free meal out of her." Sam said but her tone suggested that she wasn't serious. It was always smoke and mirrors with the blond girl but sometimes it wasn't so bad. "And maybe some light making-out."

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><p><strong>AN –** Gina seems nice right? Well, Freddie doesn't think so. XD That poor boy. Next chapter will be up on Thursday. R&R guys!


	16. iCan't Believe It

**A/N –** New chapter! This actually brings up issues from the last two chapters. And yes, you guys may hate this chapter. Sorry. And thanks to **Julefor** for inspiring the first part of the chapter. And for those who want shout-outs (you know who you are) I will do that in the next chapter. :) Ps. I don't own iCarly…yet. Muahaha.

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><p>We all hung out in Carly's apartment, and by <em>we<em> I mean Carly, Sam and I. I don't know what Sam did... If she did anything but when she dragged me into the Shay's apartment, Carly didn't try to kill me. In fact, I'd think she was warming up to me again.

"Gibby?" I asked into the silence and Sam smirked at me. Carly, who was in the kitchen getting lemonade, gave Sam and I a cool look.

"Yeah what possessed you to go out with that little freak anyway, Carls?" Sam asked and though Carly's back was turned, I saw the anger on her face in the way her shoulders had tensed at Sam's words.

"He is not a little freak. In fact he-." Carly stumbled over her words to explain.

"Is he paying you? Did you lose a bet? I mean you were always nice to him but that is because he is a buttered up little weirdo and your nice Carly Shay."

"Sam," I warned her softly. Sam wanted to know why Carly would date Gibby but her skills of deduction were sub par and so she had to go straight for the throat.

Ignoring me, Sam went into the kitchen and sat on a stool near Carly. Spreading her arms wide, Sam said, "I just don't understand, Carls. You dumped Griffin because he collected peewee babies. You even said that you liked bad boys... More than once. And that is not what Gibby is."

"That boy takes off his shirt to help little old ladies cross puddles without getting wet." I offered from the couch, where I shifted to take up the entire couch when Sam left.

"See Carly, a prime example of Gibby's kindness and strangeness." Sam said.

"How is that strange?" Carly asked. "Freddie, would you take off you shirt like that?"

I wasn't paying attention and snapped my attention back to Carly. "Uh... Maybe my jacket but I won't go shirtless so an elderly woman doesn't get her tennis shoes wet because then if I out my shirt back on, I'll be the wet one. Would you Carly?"

"No!" Carly snapped a bit too quickly. She paused and lowered her voice to a whisper. "...But for obvious reasons."

Sam grabbed a wax fruit out of the dish on the counter and took a bite. I smirked at the look on Carly's face, and through her mouthful of wax Sam said, "If I were nice... And weird, I'd take off my shirt."

"Sam, that's not ladylike!" Carly squawked at her friend. Who did Carly think she was talking to? Sam didn't care.

"If you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly ladylike," Sam informed Carly, fishing the piece of wax out of her mouth and sticking it back onto the apple. Then she put the whole thing back much to Carly's chagrin.

"Why must you always act so uncivil, Sam?" Carly groaned in a defeated tone.

"Because being civil means you date _things _like Gibby." Sam laughed and I joined in. It was just too funny. Gibby and Carly? That was just ridiculous.

"Okay, you two... Out." Carly announced, steering Sam towards the door. Carly grabbed my wrist as she passed and I was expelled from the apartment too.

"It was just a joke, Carly." Sam said but Carly didn't relent.

"Well you two are being mean and I have to get ready for another date." Carly slammed the door on Sam's laughter. It was just so contagious so I joined in.

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><p>Sam and I walked down West Boulevard, both of us crossing our arms over our chests for warmth. It wasn't too cold but I wished after Carly kicked us out I had thought to grab a jacket.<p>

"You know," Sam began and I glanced at her. "I give them a week." She pulled out a cigarette as she spoke and cupped her hands, trying to light it.

"I give you a week too if you don't stop with the cancer sticks," I chastised, pulling the cigarette from her mouth and dropping it to the sidewalk. "Sam... Don't." I groaned as she picked up and lit the cigarette I just dropped on the ground.

"You don't waste a good cigarette." She shrugged at me.

"And you don't waste a good life," I told her.

"Don't talk to me about wasting lives, Benson. You wouldn't be a nerd if you believed that crap." Sam began to tell me.

"That's not true..." I stammered.

Sam stepped in front of me, her cigarette butt mere inches from my face and her hands on my shoulders. She fixed me with an intense stare. "If you could Benson, don't dare tell me that you would trade this life for one with money or intelligence or popularity or simply one without a crazy mother."

"Actually I don't think-."

"Can it, Benson. You don't have a girlfriend. You live in an apartment on the not-so-nice side of Seattle, you're friends with me and a girl who will never love you. Don't try to tell me you wouldn't." She paused and looked sadly at me. "I would."

"But-."

"Look, Fredbag. I think I'm going to get going. Talk to you never... Hopefully." Staring after the blond in the dimming evening, all I could think was that she was rather solemn today. Not so much violent or angry... But sad... merely sad...

I couldn't just leave it like that and while I knew she'd hate me for doing it, I started to follow her. Not in a creepy stalkerish way, I just planned to catch up with her when she calmed down a bit. However she must have heard or seen me because after a few minutes she broke into a run. I didn't run too because Sam may be more athletic than me but she'd have to slow sometime.

That's when I heard the scream. It was a girl, I knew that much but it couldn't be Sam could it? I mean, I never heard Sam scream and that was a very girly scream. When it came again I didn't pause to wonder about it, I shot down the street and swung around the corner. It sounded again to my right in an alleyway.

I peered down nervously, unsure if I could handle this on my own. I wished Sam was there because she could kick some serious butt. Then I realized Sam was here and that the girl down the alley was none other than my vicious, meat-eating friend, and she was losing this fight.

I pulled out my phone, dialed 911 and put the ringing phone back in my pocket. As I surged towards Sam and her attacker, I heard a calm voice speaking from my pocket. "Hey, let her go!" I screamed, loud enough so the operator would hear me. The attacker stopped and peered at me.

"Or what?" The voice that came out of the darkness was cold and gravelly. As my eyes adjusted I saw a man easily twice my size holding onto Sam's limp arm. LIMP? Sam seemed to be knocked out, her eyes shut away from the world.

"I'll already call 911." I informed him, trying to be brave. Yet looking at Sam gave me a rush of confidence. "They'll be here in under five minutes, but if you want to go to jail over some stupid broad that's your problem."

I turned as if I was leaving the alley and behind me I heard the man's stillness. "Well, I could just kill you and take her elsewhere." I closed my eyes, not wanting to imagine that alternative. It was hard to imagine me dead but it was way too easy to imagine... I cut the thoughts off right there, my gut churning.

"Yes but they're tracking her cell phone signal, not mine." The man looked at me a moment and back at Sam. I was stalling but it was working. Somewhere the wind carried the faint sounds of sirens. I only needed to man to hold off for a few more minutes or drop Sam and run.

"Where's her phone?" The man asked frantically searching through Sam's pockets. I shrugged at him and saw his face turn red. "Goddamn it! You're just playing me aren't you? There's no cops, and you can't stop me."

The man lurched up to me, leaving Sam slumped in the garbage. She'd definitely need a shower when this was all over. I mustered all my strength and swung at the large man, throwing him off guard. His face was one of surprise but he didn't go down. His fist came back at me and caught me under the chin. I hit the ground hard.

He stood over me, his foot kicking my side harder and harder until I thought my ribs would crack. Then as if I wasn't incapacitated enough he placed his foot on my chest, ready to crush me. I closed my eyes waiting for the pain but instead I heard the scream of some animal. Opening an eye I saw the man swinging around, Sam Puckett clinging to his back. Her teeth were sunk into his neck.

There wasn't much I could do except stay out of Sam's way but I watched wearily as Sam hit him again and again and again. The sirens were louder now and I saw the lights reflecting around the street. The cars pulled to a stop and officers piled out. "Freeze."

Everything was a blur after that. The man whose name turned out to be Dorian—Haha… Dorian—was handcuffed and taken away. Sam and I had to answer some questions and get a check-up. Apparently, Dorian had bruised my side and caused some bad damage to Sam's head when he had swung her around. Then, a nice officer offered us rides home and we both accepted.

As we loaded in the back of the cop car, Officer Rivera-Martinez turned back to smile at us. "Where to?" I paused and looked at Sam who was slumped against my arm exhausted.

"Bushwell Plaza." I told him and I reached down to stroke the head of blond curls.

A few minutes of silence stretched out. Officer Rivera-Martinez turned on the radio, playing some classic music but I was in no position to complain. I glanced at Sam's face in the passing lamplight outside, admiring her beauty even with gauze around most her head. The examiner said that there was no concussion and no stitches needed but we should keep the wound cleaned and bandaged. I wanted Sam to go to the hospital just to make sure but she didn't want to and the EMTs allowed her that decision.

"Thanks," I heard her murmur weakly and I bent down and kissed the part of her head not wrapped up. She bent her head upward to watch me with those blue eyes of hers and our lips met. I didn't question it nor did I stop it. Something changed but I wasn't sure what and I wasn't complaining.

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><p><strong>AN – **See, NO ONE is safe in my stories. R&R please.


	17. iHave Too Many Firsts

**A/N – **This chapter happened to me once and so this is one of my favorite chapters. XD Disclaimer: I do not know.

And guess what time it is… MAIL TIME! Jk. It's time to thank those insufferable ninnies who force me to write shout outs by being awesome at reviewing my chapters. Thanks to **Julefor, luktheduke, ZenNoMai, seddieSUPERFAN101, alex02, Purple550, **and **mekaylawrotethis. **Just remember because of you guys I have no friends. I'm just messing. Thanks so much guys.

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><p>When we reached the apartment building, I thanked Officer Rivera-Martinez and climbed out. Sam at some point had fallen asleep, so shrugging at the officer I scooped her into my arms and carried inside. I paused to watch the police car pull away. Looking down that girl in my arms I knew that wasn't her first time in a police car but probably the first time she had done nothing wrong to be put in the back of one.<p>

Crossing the lobby, I realized this was not the first time I carried Sam up to the apartment but this time I was taking Sam up to my apartment, not Carly's. I stepped into the elevator, careful not to whack the blond's head on the wall. She mumbled in her sleep. As it rose to my floor, it stopped once and a little boy with his mother walked in.

The mother eyed Sam and I for a moment. "Your girlfriend there have a long night?" She asked pleasantly, peering at the grime and twigs in Sam's hair from the alleyway. Looking in the woman's face I saw none of the suspicion that would be expected from a strange sight such as this.

"Yep." I told the woman with a smile but then glanced nervously at Sam. I almost expected her to wake up and punch me for letting something think we were together. Instead I thought I saw a flicker of a smile cross her lips but maybe I just imagined it. "Well, here's our stop." I told the kind lady and stepped out.

Opening my apartment door, I lay Sam gently on the couch and went into the kitchen to get a packet of ham. Since the last time Sam came over for ham, I actually bought some for her. I figured that the next time she came over and I didn't have ham, she might resort to roasting me up.

When I came back into the living, Sam was sitting up and watching me. "Hey, how do you feel?" I asked her, passing the packet of meat that she tore into without a second thought. I tried not to be disgusted by her animalistic hunger.

"Dirty." She said, pausing for a moment to shoot me a sad look.

"Do you want to take a bath?" I offered with a smile but Sam's look was skeptical. "If you want to change into some fresh clothes, you can borrow some of mine." I figured she was about my size. I was a bit bigger but oversized clothes were better than dirty ones.

"Yeah sure… I wear boxers anyway." She grumbled, rolling off the couch and following me into the bathroom. I leaned over and turned on the faucet so that when she got it would be warm.

"Okay, just let it get warm. It should be a few minutes." I told her but she wasn't exactly paying attention—she was standing in the doorway of the bathroom, gnawing on her hunk of ham. "I'll grab you some towels." I told her, pressing past her and disappearing into the hall so I could get her towels from the linen closet.

When I came back I stopped in my tracks. Sam was standing in the middle of the bathroom with the door wide open and she was taking off her clothes. Turning to look at me I noticed that she was only wearing her bra and her boxers (which apparently she wasn't lying about).

"What's the matter, Benson?" Sam asked, smirking and taking the towels from me. "Never see a girl naked?"

"Uh…" I stammered, unsure if my answer would get me killed or laughed at.

"Seeing your mom naked-." She paused and shivered in disgust. "Doesn't count."

"Why do you always have to rip on me, Puckett?" I snapped, backing out of the room and pulling the door shut behind me. I figured if she wanted to finish the conversation, she could just talk through the door.

"Because I love it." I could hear her smirk through the door. "Hey, where is your mom?"

"At work. Why?" I asked her but the door swung open again and Sam was dragging me into the room with her. "W-what…?"

"Scrub my back," She snapped at me, plopping down into the tub. I tried to ignore her nudity and wondering why she was torturing me this way.

"You are impossible." I muttered, taking up a rag and scrubbing her back. At least from that angle all I saw was her hair and back. To be honest, as much as I was teenage boy with teenager hormones, this wasn't as awkward as it could be.

"How?"

"Are you just lazy or are you just messing with me?" I asked her, and she turned her bright blues eyes on me.

"I can't just be lazy?" She asked me, her voice almost sad. "It's just been a long night." She told me, letting her head fall back against my leg. Her eyes flickered shut and I felt bad—she was right it was a long night for both of us. My ribs still hurt.

"No… no, you can." I told her gently.

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><p>I watched her in my bed, the covers bunched up around her. I couldn't see anything of her but her hair. She fell asleep halfway through her bath and so I forced her awake so she could get dressed. Plus, I didn't feel comfortable dressing her myself.<p>

"Freddie?" She asked suddenly, surprising me as I thought she was passed out beyond waking up ever. "I'm cold."

"Want another blanket?" I asked her, heading into the hall to once again visit the linen closet.

"No." She said sternly and I walked back in with a confused expression on my face. "Just join me."

"Don't you think that would be inappropriate?" I asked slowly, walking into the room.

"You are such a prude, Benson." She snarled at me. "We're not going to do anything… just sleep." She offered, holding up the cover and motioning for me to climb into the bed with her. While this was just as comfortable about the bathroom incident, I climbed in anyway.

Sam draped her arm me and snuggled against my back. After a few minutes I thought she was asleep so I tried to climb out again but her grip was stronger than I thought. "Where do you think you're going?"

"No where." I mumbled and she sat up to glare at me. "Okay… I'm just afraid that my mind will come home and see us."

"No… you're afraid of me." Sam told me and I turned to look at her.

"Sam…what are we doing?" I asked her.

"We're trying to sleep. But-." Sam started angrily.

"No… I want a straight forward answer for once, Sam." I snapped. She would always beat around the bush and so I didn't know if we were dating or not or if there was any feelings between us. Through the last few weeks we were enemies, friends-with-benefits, just friends and now what?

"I don't know, Benson." She admitted after a moment of silence. "What do you think?

"Well, I thought we might be dating." I told her and I saw her grimace involuntarily. "Or not… I mean if you don't like me."

"I never said that," She grumbled into the pillow and turned away from me, facing the wall. "Ask me in the morning."

"You can't stay here until morning." I told her in exasperated tones.

"Okay then. Ask me another time." With that she stood and walked over to my window. Sliding it open she disappeared outside onto the fire escape.

"Sam, I don't want you walking home in the dark alone." I said, walking to the window.

"Don't worry, Mom… I don't plan to." She scoffed at me as if my stupidity was unbelievable. I figured it was a rational notion. "I'm just going over to Carly's apartment. And you know my clothes?"

"Yeah, I'll wash them and get them back." I informed her.

"No, just get rid of them." She paused. "I don't want any reminders."

I watched her disappeared from view and I wondered if I counted as a remaindered but since she said I could ask her another time that meant I would see her again. Yet I couldn't help but fear, as I couldn't see her any longer that she would just phase me out rather than answer my questions. That wasn't the first time I fell asleep thinking about a certain blond again.

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><p><strong>AN – **An awkward chapter for an awkward relationship. R&R guys and you might earn absolutely nothing but you might make me smile. Just think of the children (though I'm not one anymore).

P.S If you haven't noticed… I'm in a very good mood today! Next update on Tuesday!


	18. iDon't Tell

**A/N -** Thanks to a certain impatient someone... *cough* **ZenNoMai** *cough* I have this early update for you guys. So yes, you can blame him for this. XD Actually I had this update already but I was urged to post it earlier than expected. So enjoy.

Disclaimer: Do I seriously have to do this still? If you're reading this Dan Schneider... thanks but try not to sue me accidentally or anything like that.

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><p>"Don't you dare tell Carly about what happened the other night."<p>

The first time I saw Sam in about a week and that was the first thing she hissed in my ear. She burst into Carly's apartment where I was lounging on the couch. To hide her whisper, she knocked me to the ground and sat on my back, dipping her head to my head for just a moment to whisper her warning.

"What? The attack or our rampant evening of passionate sex?" I muttered through clenched teeth, so low that only Sam heard. Even so she grabbed a handful of my hair and preceded to ram my face into the hardwood flooring again and again. A spattering of my own blood stained the wood in the streak but I said nothing.

Then I heard, "Gibby just texted me." Carl's voice faltered. "Don't kill each other."

The door slammed behind her. And suddenly I was being hauled off the floor and slammed onto my back. "Awww... Damn." Sam groaned when she saw my nose. Launching off me, she disappeared into the kitchen and came back with a tissue.

"Since when do you care about hurting me?" I smirked at her as she dabbed at my bloody nose, grimacing.

"Since-." She stopped, blanching. "Nothing." Without another word, she hauled me to my feet and shoved me onto the couch. Sinking onto the couch next to me, she curled her legs underneath her and snuggled comfortably into the arm of the sofa.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked into the silence.

"No."

"Oh no, you can't tell me that... You said I could ask you next time I saw you." I countered and she hung her head. "What are we doing, Sam?"

A silence feel over the room-the kind that suffocates like a wet blanket, attempting to snuff out everything around it. I felt the strain in the air and so could Sam but that probably had to do with the fact that she was causing it.

"What do you want to do?" She asked, fixing me with a cold stare. I wasn't sure how to respond because to be honest I wanted to kiss her but like with anything I do, she might hurt me if I did it.

"Ask you if you're okay." I replied, staying the safe route. "You know, after what happened."

"Yeah, I'm fine." She said her voice low and bitter. I glanced at her almost sadly.

"Liar..." I said softy, scooting closer to her. She looked up at me with wide eyes and nuzzled into my arm. The actions was so out of character it was just strange. "What's bothering you?"

She took in a quavering breath. "I am the strong one, Benson. No one hurts me and yet this guy... This random guy just jumps me out of no where." She paused. "Then you come along and save me."

"So are you mad at me?" I asked slowly.

"I should be." She admitted with a frown. "But I'm not, in fact... I'm grateful. Granted I think I might have been able to handle it myself but if I hadn't..."

"Let's no discuss what could of happened, Sam" I said gently.

"Good because I'm not, Frednubs." Sam laughed, hugging my arm and grinning. Old Sam was back again, giving me that wolfish grin as she placed her hand on the back of my head. She lowered my head to hers, pressing our lips together. Why did these situations always end with kisses? Not that I'm complaining, of course.

"You never answered my question, Sam."

"Shut up and kiss me, Fredbag."

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><p>Carly returned a few hours later, poor Gibby in tow. Both were smiling and laughing as they burst into the calm, quiet bubble Sam and I created. Sam who was curled up on my arm scrambled backwards from me and actually ended up sitting crossed-legged on the floor. "Hey, you two!" Carly chirped. "I didn't know you two were still here. Nice to see you're still alive at least, Freddie."<p>

"Uh... Hey." Sam and I both muttered feebly. One look at Sam's face confirmed that she too was kind of disappointed Carly was back. From the look on Gibby's face, he knew that Carly had ruined something. Only Carly was bouncing around in her oblivious, naive bubble.

"So, guys, I had this awesome idea when Gibby and I were out at dinner!" Carly clapped her hands and behind her where Gibby stood, he shook his head. "I want you two to be as happy as I am-." Cue the simultaneous nervous gulp. "And so on the next iCarly we will play iWin A Date! I already have all the boys and girls lined up to play two rounds: one for Freddie and one for Sam."

"Carly, I'm not going to lie... The answer is no." I said bluntly but calmly.

I didn't want to be hooked up with some random girl I had no interest in. I was interested in... No, I'm not going to say it because I am not in love with that _thing. _No one just falls in love with Sam Puckett... unless they are stupid, and that is not me. I can build a computer from scratch and program anything onto any computer. My common sense on the other hand... that is questionable. I hang out with Sam for god's sake!

"Yeah, Carls... For once I'll have to agree with Freddie." Sam cut in, standing and glaring at Carly.

"Sam do you remember the time I-." Carly began sweetly but a malicious look came not her eye and out of the corner of mine I saw Sam blanch. "Yeah, Sam... I went there."

Sam gulped again and looking at me said, "Sorry, Fredloser... We're doing the game show."

I looked at Sam and Carly with a horrified expression and realized something... _I was a bigger idiot that I could imagine._

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><p><strong>AN - **Sorry for the short chapter guys but I think some nice little revelations in this one make up for that. :) I'll try to have another chapter up by Tuesday!


	19. iWin A Date

**A/N – **A long update to make up for my short one. The second part isn't my favorite but more drama and such next update (which should be Tuesday unless I lied again).

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><p>Carly spent all the next day at school, appearing and disappearing with warning. Every time Sam and asked her where she went she'd lie—badly by the way—and say she has to get the science homework or use the bathroom. Sam and I didn't believe her one bit. I figured she was recruiting people for iCarly later on.<p>

So when Sam asked me to meet her in the janitor's closet via text message, I asked to use the bathroom and practically ran there. Sam was inside already, smoking another goddamn cigarette. "If you set off the fire alarms-."

"There aren't any in here. We'll be fine if you close the door." I pushed it shut behind me and plunged the dank space into darkness. All I could see was the glowing red cherry of the cigarette bobbing as Sam brought it to her mouth.

"_We_?" I gaped though the blond couldn't see my face. My hands scoured the wall for a light switch. "You're the one with the death stick."

"Don't call it that, Benson." She snarled, coming dangerously close to burning me as she stabbed the air dramatically.

"Sam, really, I'd like you to stop. You could _die_!" I snapped. Looking at the embers, I tried not imagine Sam lying in a bed hooked up to a bunch of wires and needles like that time when the hammer hit her... Only this time it'd be for something fatal or at least more fatal.

"You can also die from driving, cooking, eating, drinking, playing the Wii..." She rattled off a list aimlessly. I raised my eyebrows at the last one but once again it was rather pointless. Yet as her list trailed off, so did the glowing end. She smudged it against the concrete with a satisfying hiss. "But if it will make you feel better... I'll smoke _less_."

"Now why did you call me in here?" I said, trying to ignore the feeling of Sam's eyes on my skin. In the dark it was only that much more menacing. I reached towards where the wall was supposed to be but grabbed something a lot... softer.

The smack came quickly and hard as if Sam was waiting for it. "Watch it! Think you could just come in here and grope me?" She snarled and in my mind's eye, I could see her savage expression and her eyes blazing.

"Sorry, sorry!" I yelped but quickly shut up so no one heard me outside the room. I hissed back. "I was looking for the light switch."

"You mean _this _light switch?" Sam said smugly and the lights flickered on. It was blinding for a moment but when my eyes adjusted, I caught Sam eyeing me strangely.

"Sorry," I mumbled again. "Now what did you want?" I sighed and crossed my arms across my chest.

"Just to be alone with you some more. Carly did interrupt us last night," She said silkily, standing and draping her arms around my neck. Her lips met mine slowly and gently as if unsure. Sam was _never _unsure but I didn't want to ask lest she get mad, scalp me and leave my mangled body on the floor.

"So wait, you called me out of Physics for a make out session?" I groaned between kisses.

"Yeah... Is there something wrong with that?" She hissed. "Because you had no problem before."

"But before I didn't-." I stammered. I didn't know how to word it.

"What? Need to get an A? You'd get one anyway." She paused thinking of another reason… another guess. "Hate me as much as you do now? That's rather impossible since you hate me so much as it is." That one stung but I said nothing. "Love me? Well-."

She caught my eye and fell silent, and I said nothing into the silence that filled the room. I felt clammy and my cheeks flushed red. Sam's eyes grew wide as she watched me, and I opened my mouth to refute her statement but the words didn't come and I wasn't exactly trying too hard. I clenched my fists.

"That's it isn't it?" Sam snapped bitingly, and gave a sharp, cold laugh. She fixed me with dark eyes and whispered, "What would make you fall in love with me, Benson? You said it yourself... I'm a bitch. This is as much just kissing to me as it is to you. We're using one another… _There's no love._"

I swallowed back the pain that ballooned in my chest at her words. It was as if she stabbed me. It might have hurt less. "But it was wrong when I used Valerie?"

"It was because you lied." She paused. "I never said anything about you using her."

"I-." I decided to shut up while I was ahead. Sam had already crushed me—she didn't share my feelings. I was nothing more to her than a pair of soft lips and warm arms. I turned to leave but paused fixing her with a harsh stare. "When I called you a bitch... I guess I was right. And I don't love you."

At least that last part was true.

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><p>Sam wouldn't look at me and I don't blame her but I still couldn't believe her. I honestly thought she was warming up to me and just after I realized that maybe I <em>was <em>in love with her. Her blatant rejection—well kind of rejection—felt like a cold slap across the face so trust me when I say I wasn't looking at her either.

"Freddie... _Freddie_." Carly said again but louder. I turned to look at her. "Go check on the boys in the hall and make sure they all showed. And you, Sam." Carly said, getting the blond to look up from where her eyes were glued to her phone. "Go check on the girls downstairs."

I watched Sam descend the stairs to make sure all my potential dates showed and I had to do the same but for her. Stepping into the hall I saw Billy Sherman, a boy from my English class who was a wrestler; Kyle Maxwell, who was one of Socko's cousins and I met only once before; and Reuben Kinsley, one of Gibby's more odd friends who no one ever understands. "Hey, guys."

"Hey," Kyle and Billy said in unison.

Reuben smiled at me widely and said, "'Sup soda bottle nose!" Kyle, Billy and I both gave him oblong looks before Carly burst through the door yelling some indiscernible. "You don't need bubble-wrap to know when it's chowder time, bubble face." Reuben reassured her but of what, I wasn't sure.

We all looked at him before Carly spoke. "Come in quick and take your places before Sam sees." She paused and regarded Reuben a moment. "Did he say I have a fat face?"

"No, Carly... You have a fine face. Now, let's go." I said, ushering her and the boys out into the studio where cardboard was set up so Sam couldn't see the contestants. I figured that the sooner this was over with the better. I could go home and forget all about Sam Puckett, and even have a nice date with a nice girl.

"Don't forget to-." Carly began but I held up a hand to silence her. At that moment Sam bounded back up the stairs but it was too late, the boys were hidden.

"Disguise their voices. I know." I carried the microphones to the boys, telling them to be quiet until I had them set up. "Okay, we're set and with a minute to go." I announced loudly as Carly wrestled Sam onto the stool.

"There's a free dinner in it for you if you cooperate." Carly encouraged and with that Sam sat up straighter and accepted the note cards from Carly that had a bunch of different questions to ask. "And you can use these."

"Ready?" Carly nodded. "In 5...4...3...2..." The last was unspoken and the show was on. I zoned out, looking at Sam's skeptical profile while Carly introduced the game. Behind Carly, Sam made a few funny faces and I had to force myself not to laugh. The I remembered I was mad at Sam and I sobered up.

"Okay, the first question I have is 'What is you favorite food?" Sam asked, looking uncomfortable.

"Turnips," Said Kyle instantly as he was the first contestant. His digitally altered nasally voice almost made me cringe.

"What kind of favorite food is that?" Sam snapped.

"I'm a vegetarian!" Kyle said loudly and I actually saw Sam cringe but I wasn't sure if it was from his voice or his vegetarianism.

"Well, I like cheeseburgers." Contestant number two aka Billy answered much to Sam's apparent joy.

"Aye, stick a jibstick on a tri-flubbed Yankee and call me dandy." Reuben yelled excitedly, sounding like a teenage girl through the microphone. I could only smirk.

Sam looked at the divider in confusion before looking back at her cards. "What do you look for in a girl?"

"I like bad girls. Piercings are a plus." Kyle announced.

"Sweet. Sexy. And if they need me to protect them, that seals the deal." Billy retorted and I felt my own face pull into a grimace.

"Top hat on a well-to-do cherry dove with fried capers hits the cattle." Guess who said that one...

A few questions later it seemed none were really in Sam's favor. Kyle, of course, was a vegetarian but also loved poetry and wanted to be a pilot. Billy fell out of Sam's favor with his sexist comments and a penchant for building doll houses, and well, Reuben was the only one that Sam really seemed to warm up to. She couldn't understand a word he said but he said nothing to make her dislike him. I disliked him.

Finally it was time for Sam to pick someone but she refused. "Come on, Sam. Just pick one."

"No!" She snapped.

"No free dinner then." Carly responded and I saw Sam's tough façade crumble just a bit.

"Okay… number three," She blurted out without thinking and Reuben hopped out from behind the screen.

"There's my raspberry soccer ball!" The boy shouted and flung himself at Sam. While Sam seemed grateful it wasn't Billy or Kyle, she still looked a little irritated at the boy.

"Now, everyone, our tech-producer Freddie will get his chance at finding a special someone." Carly announced and I groaned as I was forced on the stool and handed a wad of note cards. "Now close your eyes so you don't see the contestants."

I heard a shuffling a feet and muffled voices. A stool scooted across the floor and my blindfold was being removed. Sam looked down at me and I saw around her that Carly held the camera. When I glanced back at Ms. blond hair and blue eyes, she thumped me right between the eyes before scurrying over to chat aimlessly with Reuben.

"Okay, so what is your favorite thing to do?" I asked and waited with bated breath.

"I like drawing and painting and writing and biking and sailing and singing and dancing and playing trombone and acting like a duck and…" The first contestant went on and on. "And watching iCarly and drawing iCarly and painting iCarly…"

"I love to work on computers." The second girl laughed and I smiled at that.

"Magic isn't a hobby for me… it's my life!" The last girl shrieked. I don't think I liked her.

"What is your favorite food?" I asked, stealing a question from Sam.

"Whatever the iCarlys like. I think that's spaghetti tacos, right? Spencer makes those… I like Spencer but I like you too, Freddie." The first girl rambled. I tuned her out really.

"I like cheesecake." The second girl told me.

"I don't like food." The third girl said ominously.

So by the time that Carly said time was up and I had to pick a girl, contestant number two was way ahead of the others. The first contestant wouldn't shut up and the third was negative, mysterious and all around just weird, and she kept chanting weird things that sounded dark and evil. She even said a few times that she was casting love spells on me. That chick was crazy.

The second contestant bounced around the divider, her brown curls bouncing behind her and staring at me with bright brown eyes. Her name was Shannon and was a girl in my Algebra class. She smiled at me sweetly, hugged me and she smelled like lilac and vanilla. "I'm looking forward to our date." I told her honestly.

"Now, for these four lucky teenagers, we have a surprise. The winner's receive an all expense paid dinner for six at the Cheesecake Warehouse! Not only will Freddie, Sam and their dates be attending, my boyfriend and me will be joining them for a triple date! And that is our show for tonight!" Carly yelled into the camera, smiling brightly

I glanced sideways at Sam and caught her doing the same. A triple date… with that _thing?_ Shannon might be the nicest girl ever but with Sam around, our date would be a bust. I wanted to back out but I knew going would be my best bet probably. Not going would just alienate Shannon and explaining why I didn't want to go would just be worse. So instead, I forced a smile and got ready to go on a date with Sam… and Sam's date. And my own… of course.

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><p><strong>AN – **Can anyone guess who contestant number 1 and 3 were for Freddie? They are characters in the show and I hope you can figure them out. I will let you know who they are for sure in my next update. :P And to take care of this now, I think contestant number 1 in the show isn't actually the same age as Carly and them but I'm not sure so for all my intents and purposes everyone is about the same age.


	20. iGo On My Date

**A/N – **I'm back from Wisconsin, everyone! My little family emergency is all worked out, so my posting schedule will resume Tuesday but as soon as I got home this morning, I started this chapter for y'all. I had to go to the doctor and well, I just finished the chapter. A late update but in retrospect I planned the next one to be up Tuesday so this is early, in fact. R&R guys!

P.s – I heard that iLost My Mind is coming out on April 13th! Can't wait.

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><p>I was never one for believing in all that premonition crap—I'm a man of science—but I couldn't discount the bad feeling I had about the upcoming date. It coated my tongue bitterly and no amount of water could wash away the disgusting taste as I finished buttoning my shirt.<p>

Stepping back I looked at my outfit in the mirror. I was wearing black pants, brown dress shoes and a blue button-up shirt. I tugged it down at the ends and attacked my hair with the brush, trying to get my cowlick to stay down. Finally I resorted to gel, though I didn't really want to.

I walked into my living room to grab my wallet and cell phone to see my mom sitting on the couch. "Going somewhere?"

"Yes," I told her, sitting on the couch for a moment. "I told you that I was going on a date with that girl Shannon."

"Well, I think we need to have a talk." My mom began. _Oh, crap._ "You're going out on your first date with a girl… alone."

I took a deep breath. "Mom, I'm not going alone. It's a triple date with Sam, Reuben, Carly and Gibby. Also, this won't be my first date… I think."

I wasn't exactly sure but I was pretty convinced that I went on a date with Sam at some point. Maybe it was that time we went to the movies or maybe one of the times I met her during classes. I didn't feel like explaining it to my mom so I stood and walked to the door, making a show of putting my coat on.

KNOCK. KNOCK.

"That's Carly and Sam." I said quickly, pulling open the door. "I'll be back at eleven, if not earlier."

My mom started to say something but I didn't hear it.

I ran out into the hall to see Sam and Carly standing there. Carly look like she always did—perfect. She wore a deep purple sweater dress with a leather belt. Her stockings were a design of swirls and flowers. On her feet were shin-high boots, and she wore a pretty purple headband.

Sam, on the other hand, was wearing a red penny tee, and over that she wore a black jacket. She also wore black jeans and her usual red converse. Around her neck she wore a small cold chain and for some reason—that most likely had to do with Carly—her hair was pulled in a messy bun that fell in long strands around her face. And I couldn't help but think that she was the prettier of the two.

What was I thinking? I had a date with Shannon, not Sam Puckett. Tearing my eyes from the blond, I smiled lightly at Sam. "Ready to go, ladies?"

Sam raised an eyebrow at me. "Now I'm a lady? Last week I was a _thing_…"

"_Sam._" Carly hissed as they loaded into the elevator. "Let's just enjoy our evening."

Sam snorted loudly. "I'll try."

"What do you mean?" Carly asked, as I pushed the button for the lobby. The whirling of the elevator's mechanics filled the silence that followed.

"Like I want to go on a date with Mr. No One Understands." She snapped and Carly physically flinched. "He is almost as nubby as the queen of the nubs over here." She explained, jabbing a finger at me. Even when she hates my guts, she still openly mocks me.

"Then why'd you pick him?" Carly asked. We walked into the lobby where Gibby stood. For once he was wear a shirt but it was a penny tee like Sam's but green. Over that he had an open plaid collared shirt and black dress pants. He smiled brightly and waved at us.

"Because I didn't think about my choice to be honest." Sam admitted bitterly. She shoved open the doors to the lobby just as Lewbert became aware of our presence in his lobby. His screams followed us into the taxi and when the door shut all that was left was Sam chatting with Carly critically about Reuben. "I still think I'd rather go on a date with him though than a vegetarian or a sexist pig."

"What's wrong with vegetarians?" Gibby asked, turning around from where he sat in the front seat next to the driver.

"ARRRRGGGGHHH!" Sam screamed in Gibby's face. The driver swerved in fear at Sam's outburst but quickly righted himself and finished the drive to restaurant.

Staring out the window, I wondered morbidly, if a car accident might have saved me from a terrible night. I was excited to go out with Shannon but the blond that sat on the other side of Carly seriously threatened that simple hope.

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><p>I liked sci-fi but I knew it was all fiction-as in fake, but looking across the table at Sam laughing and conversing with Reuben, I was really apt to believe in the body snatchers, a race of aliens that stole people and replaced them with clones. Her generally kindness and acceptance of Reuben was just as foreign as Carly making googly-eyes at Gibby.<p>

Even with Shannon, who looked cute in a pink turtleneck and a pleated khaki skirt, chatting about computers and html coding, I felt weirdly out of place. I tried poking at my cheesecake but it was as if my stomach was doing flip-flops. Leaning over, I listened harder to what Shannon was telling me. "And then she asked me if Windows was a virus!" Shannon laughed. "I don't think people over sixty should be allowed anywhere near technology."

I laughed hollowly but found my eyes sliding across the table to a certain blond who was laughing rancorously about something Reuben said. It had something to do with pickles… or something but it was all lost in translation. I pushed that out of my mind. Why was I so fixated on Sam?

"Yeah, my mom always asks me what a hard drive is and if she needs to 'clean it'." I told Shannon, trying to enjoy my date. She batted her long brown eyelashes and I felt myself smiling at her. Maybe another time, another place, I could really be enjoying this date but at the moment I felt like I was going to be sick.

"Well, you can clean it but that's call defr—" Shannon paused and took in my face. "Freddie, are you okay?"

"Yeah… yeah." I told her quickly. "I'll be right back." When she gave me a concerned look, I shrugged mildly. "I just need some fresh air."

I hurried out onto the sidewalk where the cold air blew down the dark Seattle streets. A few cars hurried by, horns blaring and I was reminded for a moment of the busy street I lived on in Arkansas. I never got to stand outside like that though. I was in bed sniffling and coughing. Though the feeling in the pit of my stomach was I remembered from chronic stomach bugs. It was like every bad memory from my childhood was being dredged up.

Clutching my stomach, I stumbled away from the light spilling out from the restaurant and wretched my guts into the bushes. I felt dizziness take me over and I put a hand out against a tree trunk to keep from toppling over. Then suddenly and lightly a hand landed between my shoulder blades, startling me.

Spinning around I blinked rapidly at the girl who stood there. "Uh… what are you doing here, Sam?"

"Taking a smoke break." She told me, puffing smoke into my face.

"But you told me you would st—" My stomach lurched again and I turned away from her. The reassuring weight appeared on my back again and moved gently back and forth. It was like Sam cared. I would have laughed if not for the fact that my mouth was currently…occupied.

"I said I would do it less. I only smoked once this week." She said quietly. "But Reuben is stressing me out without the cigarette I just want to barf." I met her gaze and she smiled cruelly. "Sorry."

"But in there you're acting all lovey-dovey with him." I told her stonily.

"Then you're dumber than you look Benson." Sam sneered. "I don't like that little freak anymore than I liked Gibby… or you."

"Then—"

"You know, my mom has only given me one piece of good advice in my life."

"I don't see what this—"

"She told me that old habits die hard." She held the cigarette out as an example. "You always have to have a crutch—something to help you ease off that addition. I use gum." As she spoke she pulled a stick of pepper gum out of her pocket and started to chew it. By now the cigarette laid on the ground smoldering—where it belonged.

"Sam, I don't think I get what you're trying to tell me." I told her softly, crushing the glowing butt with my foot until all that was left was a spot of ash on the pavement.

"I was trying to use Reuben as my crutch." She deadpanned, tossing the wrapper in the gutter. She watched it a moment as the wind caught it and blew it down the road a bit before it disappeared under the tires of a speeding minivan.

'What do you mean?" I asked.

"Nothing." She paused. "Wait right here, Benson, I'll be right back."

I wanted to protest or follow her into the restaurant to spite her but my pounding head brought me to my knees. Instead I sat on the curb, watching leaves and random trash swirl around my feet. The knot was still there, in my stomach like a small burning coal, but I didn't have anything else to throw up.

A moment later Sam returned, her coat wrapped around herself and her purse slung over her arm. "Let's go." She told me, hooking her arm through mine and hauling me to my feet.

"What about our dates?" I sputtered as she steered me down the sidewalk. At least I was wearing my coat or I'd be even more upset.

"Oh. Don't worry about them." She said with a shark-toothed smile that didn't exactly reassure me. "I told them I was taking you home because you didn't feel well."

I let out a loud sigh of relief. I was afraid she might have said something to ruin my chances with Shannon later on. "Really?"

"No." Sam laughed. "I just grabbed my stuff and walked out."

"You didn't."

"Of course, I did. Since when I was nice and courteous?" Sam told me with a giggle as she turned on a main street. It was even busier than the one we came off of but more lit up. Every storefront was bright and luminous. People hurried by, tugging their coats around themselves and peering in the displays. For the middle of the school year, a lot of people were out and about.

"Sam!" I snapped loudly, tearing my arm from hers. "Don't you ever think about anyone but yourself?"

"What are you nattering on about, Benson?" Sam snapped back, her hands crossing over her chest in that menacing way. "I'm skipping out on my date—my chance to _get over you_, and somehow I'm doing this for me?"

Her words slowed me down but I didn't back down. This was Sam; you couldn't let her think she won. "Yes because this way you can ruin my chances with Shannon—my only chance to have a normal, happy relationship."

Sam looked like I had slapped her. "So you don't think you can have a happy relationship with me?"

"Relationship?" I cried and a few people turned their heads. "You told me that you didn't want to date me. Your exact words were 'This is as much just kissing to me as it is to you'. You practically spelled it out to me that I meant nothing to you except a pair of soft lips."

Sam paled at this point. Her face was bleached of all color and for the first time it really did look like Sam was going to cry. When we talked about that night… that forlorn night when that man attacked Sam, the blond's voice quivered but there was not one tear. Now, water welled in her eyes.

"Sam." I said softly. "We need to talk and you _need to be honest_."

"What if I don't want to talk?" She snarled, her color returning and her fists clenching.

"Then let me do the talking." I murmured the cliché line. "Sam, I'm not exactly sure how I feel about you right now because every time I get close to you, you step back but I think I l-like you… ever since that first kiss. I've tried to forget you but my mind just won't quit coming back to you. I wanted to try to make us work but you won't stop pushing me away." I took a deep breath. "Sam you have to decide whether you want to date me or not because this isn't fun anymore… not that it ever was exactly, but the kissing was nice."

I wanted to say 'love' but the look on Sam's face was blank enough as it was. I watched her as her expression made no change from its stagnant state. I wanted to scream and shout but I let her absorb my words at her own pace.

"Freddie, I think I should go—" I grabbed her wrist and pulled her to me. I pressed my lips to her. I didn't wrap my arms around her and after a moment I even let her wrist go. I was willing to let her walk away but she didn't Instead I felt her hands come up and cup my face, pressing me closer. Someone bumped into us and I heard a distinct click of a camera—was someone taking pictures?

We broke apart finally and I looked around to see no one standing around. Everyone was one giant rush. I turned back to Sam to see her crying—real tears and everything. Hiccups that looked painful broke up her small sobs. "Sam… I'm sorry… I didn't…"

She was shaking her head, her vision blurred by tears. She backed away from me, almost backing into the street but she paused a good three feet away from me, a horrified expression crossing her face. "I'm…. sorry, Freddie." She choked. "I just… can't…"

Turning she ran from me, darting through the crowds. For a few moments I could see her blond hair bobbing among the crowds but all to soon she was gone. The sick feeling that had faded with her around came back again. And I was left alone on the sidewalk wondering when my life became a soap opera.

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><p><strong>AN –** Ew… Freddie kissed Sam only a few minutes after throwing up. I hope he had a breath mint or something. XD As usual, thanks for reading guys and if you like (or don't like) please review. :3


	21. iConfront Her Finally

A/N - Since I was missing in action last week, I thought it fair to post an early chapter for y'all. So enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own... yet.

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><p>I was a mouse... a lowly mouse, and Sam Puckett... a large, disgruntled tabby cat that decided out of all the small and unprotected mice to go after me day in and day out. Yet that analogy wasn't exactly prevalent at the moment considering that Sam wasn't talking to me. It seemed that every time that she was mad or upset with me, she disappeared as if I was something to run away from. I did know for a fact that she could outrun me any day of the week-she didn't exactly have anything to worry about.<p>

I went over to Carly's apartment and prayed that Sam wasn't there. As much as I wanted to talk to her about what happened, her horrified expression was burned into my brain like a branding. I wondered if it was internal struggle that caused her disgust or maybe the simple fact that my mouth probably tasted like vomit. The thought made me shudder myself.

"Hey, Carls." I said, pushing into the apartment past Carly. The brunette gave me a weak smile but said nothing. "Are you okay?"

Her smile faultered and she seemed to be having a small internal struggle with herself. A few times her mouth opened but no words came out. Finally she lowered herself onto the couch, pressing a hand to her forehead in deep thought. I wanted to ask her again what was wrong but I had a feeling if I did that she would say nothing and laugh it off.

"Where did you and Sam go the other night?" She asked finally. All that thinking for that simple question? I frowned at her.

"I didn't think Sam was serious... when she told me that she didn't tell you that she was taking me home because I was sick." I admitted finally.

"You were sick?" Carly asked, her tone regretful and her eyes trepidatious.

"Yeah, I started throwing up in the bushes." I told her, and Carly nodded knowingly. "And she offered to tell you guys and take me home."

"She didn't take you all the way home did she?"

"What do you mean?"

"She came back to the resturant and told us she didn't know where you went." Carly informed me and I gritted my teeth. "Shannon thinks you just abandoned her."

I wanted to laugh and say that Shannon didn't matter but that would mean revealing what was going on with Sam and I. Carly was practically my only friend at the moment and I didn't feel like losing her too because of dishonesty. I wished I told her about what was going on from the start but it was too late now.

"I didn't..." I began but trailed off.

"I know now." Carly said softly. She paused. "Why would Sam do that to you?" She looked at me a moment, studying my face to find the answer so I tried to keep my face still. "Unless... you two had another fight."

"Another fight?" I stammered, wondering what Sam told her.

"Yeah." She gave me a cold look. "I'm not as naive as you think, Freddie. I can tell when something is up between you two. What is going on?"

"Just our usual fighting. She seems to think it is okay to mess with me... and I disagree." I told her sternly, willing her to just drop the subject. She gave another knowing nod. Obviously she didn't suspect anything more than just two frenemies fighting and not some strange, silly relationship that didn't seem to work.

"Want me to talk to her?" She asked kindly.

"No... no. I'll do it." I sighed, sitting in the chair that faced the kitchen and Carly.

"Well, here's your chance," Carly told me, looking past me with an odd expression. She rose slowly, keeping her eyes on the spot behind me as she hurried to the stairs and disappeared up them. I gritted my teeth and turned around.

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><p>Sam stood there, white as a sheet and dressed in a sweatshirt and jeans as if she didn't expect to see anyone. Frowning she kicked at the ground with her converse that she never was without. She bit her lip, as if trying to stop the words-or tears, that wanted to burst out at me. I didn't know what to say either and I was almost grateful for the silence.<p>

Finally she spoke, "Did you get home alright?"

"No... I feel asleep in a gutter and woke up to find the police taking me home." I snarled viciously, feeling a rage I didn't expect come bubbling up from inside me. "What do you think, Sam? That without you I wouldn't have the ability to get myself home in one piece?"

"Freddie that's not what I-" Sam began, clutching her fist.

"Why even ask that question, Sam? You know the answer." I cut her off bitterly. "Why not take these breaths to explain what's going on in your head, instead of beating around the bush?"

Sam paled even more and looked around nervously. She looked ready to turn and run from the apartment. "I-"

"Don't, Sam. Don't make up more excuses. You just keep pulling me closer but the second we try to do go any further in this messed-up relationship of ours, you push me away again. You started all this... why don't you just finish it?"

Sam seemed to regain her composure while I spoke and when I met her eye again, her gaze was steely. Giving me a cold grimace, she said, "Then it's finished."

"What is finished?"

"Us." Sam practically yelled. "I tried to move on but you just couldn't let me! Reuben was my crutch! My way to finally get over you and then you have to come back to kiss me. You admit your feelings to me after so long and you just expect me to melt into your kisses." She snarled, the menace in her voice caused my scalp to contract. "How long Freddie... how long do you think I've been waiting, Freddie, waiting for you to admit you love me too?"

Sam glowered at me a moment but I felt stunned. She was pissed at me because it took me a little bit longer to realize that I was in love with her. Her logic made no sense. I think that the fact that I still had feelings for her after all we went through only proved that I could do well in a relationship with her. Yet, her stupid pride or whatever it was that kept us apart, angered me more than I could imagined.

I opened my mouth to shout at her but she was gone. The door swung shut with a loud bang and I heard her footsteps down the hall. I wanted to run after her but something kept my feet rooted to the carpet, and after a moment I realized it was a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see Carly, her eyes soft. I knew she didn't know what the fight was about but from her eyes I know she knew how hurt I was.

Turning I hugged her close. Her hair smelled like roses and sugar, very unlike sam. And for some reason, the simple fact that she wasn't Sam brought my lips down to meet hers. She returned the kiss...

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><p>AN - Oh, Gibby's going to beat up Freddie now. :O

Sometimes I surprise myself with what happens. XD Generally the entire story is planned out but I do enjoy a bit of improve. R&R, guys.


	22. iAm Not A Cheater

**A/N** - A regular update? How dare I? XD Thanks to all my lovely fans who have made me who I am today a lonely shut-in who write fan fiction for iCarly. :P

Disclaimer: Do I really need to write this anymore ? I think it s implied by now.

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><p>It just wasn't fair. Now the only two friends I had were avoiding me and I was afraid to go to Gibbybecause I did kiss his girlfriend, after all. After I kissed her, Carly said nothing but said I should leave because she had to start dinner. Usually she'd invite me to stay but I tell from her strained smile, not leaving would be stupid.<p>

Instead of going out because I had no one to see anyway I sprawled out on my couch. It was my mom prodding to get me up in the first place but eventually I caved and promised to get out of bed if she made me pancakes. They were gluten-free, all-organic pancakes, of course. _Blah._ Then with a weak, concerned smile, she left for work.

Finally I was alone and so I lay back on the couch, putting my feet up on the arm. The TV served as a nice distraction for my wandering mind. When people say that TV rots the brain, it's not hard to believe them.

DING. DONG.

It had been years since anyone pressed the doorbell most people just knocked that it startled me so much so that I tumbled off the couch. My head cracked against the table and I had to haul myself to my feet using my mom's ugly, bulky bookshelves. When I was steady, I made my way to the door.

At that point I didn t bother with the peephole because it was either one of two things: Carly or Sam. The sheer idea of them both being on the other side of the door would have simultaneously made my head explode and the universe collaspe. Swinging it open, I smiled weakly. "Hey, Carly."

The brunette was wearing a pretty green dress with light green tights, white flats and a white beaded necklace. In her ears were small white studs. I even noticed that she was wearing makeup. Of course, Carly wore always makeup-she was the girly one but the entire ensamble was a bit over the top as if there was someone she planned to impression.I doubted it was me.

"Uh, Hey, Freddie," She paused and her eyes flickered downward. "You're not wearing any pants." I looked down. She was right. I was sporting my light salmon colored boxers covered in hearts. It was a birthday present from my aunt but I didn't intend to explain.

"Just ignore that," I said, returning to the couch. "What do you need?"

"To talk." Carly told me with such indignation you d think I was the one who kicked her out of the apartment, but no, it was the other way around. I gritted my teeth to keep from saying so. I picked up the worse habits from Sam but then again, I didn't learn that many great things from Carly either. "About what happened."

"Does Gibby know?" I asked, flipping through the channels as if I didn't care but I did. If Gibby found out, he'd go nuts. He may seem soft but when he thinks his honor has been besmirched, he could become a whole lot of crazy. As I settled on watching Celebrities Underwater, I couldn't help but think about the time he tackled me because I stole a cookie off his place. He didn t even eat the cookie just crushed it while screaming, "Redemption!"

"No." Carly admitted, her tone a little sad as if lying hurt her deep inside. "Why did you kiss me?"

"Why did you kiss me back?"

"Touche." She said sourly, looking down at her hands.

"Carly, let's just pretend it didn t happen. I really didn't mean for that to happen." I explained softly. "I was just feeling vulnerable," I finished lamely and looked at her expecting her to slap me or shout but only to find that she was looking at me shyly.

The moments seemed to draw out as she crossed the space between us and pressed her lips to mine. I was stunned a moment but as soon as I snapped out of my shock, I pulled away. She looked hurt but I couldn t believe that she would do that to Gibby. He was the nicest-and weirdest-boy I knew.

"Freddie, I-"

"No, please, oh, please, don t finish that sentence." I snapped, trying to control my anger. "Just don't."

In the silence that ballooned between us, I turned off the TV, spreading the suffocating silence. Carly was watching me with cold eyes, calculating, trying to find something to say, to make me do what she wanted instead of doing the right thing.

And I thought Sam was the bad influence.

"But Freddie, you like me!" She said as if that explained everything.

"Not for a long time, Carly." I told her sharply. "Not anymore." I paused. "Why are you all over me all of the sudden, Carly?" I asked angrily. "You have a boyfriend! I shouldn't have done that, and I'll explain that to Gibby next time I see him. I'm sorry but I can't believe you are acting like this. It's like you get some kind of kick out of cheating."

Her expression was blank but something in her eyes was sheer fear of being found out. Catching that gleam in her eye, I gasped and groaned at the same moment. "It's not what you think."

"Did you cheat on that Tyler guy? How about Lyon? And Cory? Rickie?" She nodded sadly to each name. I couldn't believe that Carly, the nice one was willing to cheat on Gibby with the first guy who came along. I wondered if she would have cheated on me if we had dated. It sickened me like it had when Sam kissed me on my date with Valerie. "That's just wrong, Carly."

"Freddie-" She shouted, almost at the verge of tears. I could hear the strain in her voice-she really wanted to make me understand but I couldn't understand this. Sam was the one who was always looking for a cheap thrill but never Carly. She was little Miss Play It Safe.

"I think you should leave." I told her, and she did.

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><p>After my little encounter with Carly Shay, professional cheater, I decided to get a smoothie... anything to get my mind off it. Getting my money that I kept hidden between my matress I slipped out of my apartment, hoping not to run into Carly. As I pushed open the door, the one person who I wasn't in the mood to see was there.<p>

Sam was glaring at me over her smoothie, her blond hair falling down over her shoulders. I noticed that she was wearing a blue knit turtleneck, a tan pleated skirt and light tan sandals. Around her neck hung a blue pendant on a silver chain, the most girly thing I ever saw her wearing. I gulped as her lips curled at me. Suddenly her attention was back on someone who was out of my view. I saw a dark hand reach out and take Sam's hand gently... like if she was on a date.

I walked to the counter but kept my eyes on Sam. When I got close enough I saw that Gina sat across from Sam. The brown haired, green-eyed girl even went so far as to meet my eye and smile. I forced a smile before T-Bo was asking me what I wanted. "Oh... a strawberry vanilla smoothie."

"Want a chicken leg?" He asked, holding up the stick.

"Um... no?" I told him in confusion.

T-Bo hurried off to get me my smoothie. As I waited I counted out my money in my palm. Three dollars and fifty cents. I felt the eyes on my back though and tried to ignore them as I stood there. Finally I turned and saw both Sam and Gina watcing me. I frowned at them and looked away. T-Bo was there again and I passed him my money and turned around to find a seat. The first thing I noticed was Sam coming towards me.

"Hey," She said in a chipper voice. I frowned at her with confusion. Was this another case of the bodysnatchers? Sam was not nice to me, especially after our fight. I kissed her, made her cry and pushed her away even further. Also I kissed her best friend who wanted to see me behind Gibby's back. At least I told her no. Still... Sam should hate me.

"Um.. hi. Are you alright?" I asked, susicious of her happiness. She could be happy but she was Sam Puckett and just a minute before was glaring at me.

"Yeah of course." She told me. "You remember Gina right? She finally called."

"Interesting." I told her blandly, sipping at my smoothie until all you could hear was the sound of ice at the bottom. I stopped when she pulled the smoothie away from me. "What do you want?"

"To see if you're okay." She said with a smile. "You looked a little stressed when you came in."

I paused, trying to gain my composure before I snapped at her. "A little stressed Sam? That doesn't even scrape the tip of the iceberg... I've got the girl I'm in love with pushing me away and dating someone else even though she loves me too-or at least said she did, and my other best friend is trying to cheat on her boyfriend with me because I kissed her without thinking. So... great, I think?"

Sam looked at me a moment, looking ready to protest but then paused. "Wait... you kissed Carly?"

"Well, it sure wasn't Gibby." I responded, crossing my arms.

"What happened?" Sam stammered, looking flabbergasted. I saw Gina leaning out of the booth to see us. I smiled weakly at her.

"After we fought, Carly hugged me to make me feel better and I don't know why but I kissed her. It was stupid and-"

"Do you like her?" Sam asked suddenly. I frowned at her.

"Didn't you hear me jusy say that I'm in love wih you?"

"I ignored that part." She told me dryly. "Continue with your story."

"She came over earlier and told me that she liked the kiss. She implied that she wanted to cheat on Gibby with me and admitted to cheating on almost all of her old boyfriends. I told her that I wasn't going to do that to Gibby." I told her, and she gaped at me. "Now I've got to find Gibby and tell him what happened because I want him to hear the truth from me, not a admended version from Carly. Plus he needs to know his girlfriend is a-"

"You won't have to tell him," Sam said with resignation. I turned to look behind me and there stood Gibby, stunned and holding a smoothie in one hand. I hadn't noticed him come in so he must have been there the entire time.

"Um... Hey, Gibby." I said slowly, expecting him to freak out but he didn't. He just looked at me, almost sadly. "Did you hear all of that?"

"Yeah," He paused. "You're a good friend." With that the boy walked out of the Groovy Smoothie. I knew where he was going and I frowned.

"Now that, that is settled, I'm going back to my date." Sam said with a smile and turned away from me.

"Wait... you aren't going to talk to Carly or something?" I asked.

She paused. "Freddork, I'm not your bookie. Handle your own problems." She told me sternly, sounding so much like herself that I smiled at her. "Now if you'll excuse me-"

"Why are you being nice to me?" I blurted out and she turned to look at me.

"We're friends." She looked at my expression. "At least trying to be friends. Just friends, Freddie."

And as Sam walked away I felt sadder than I think I ever had before. Since when was my life a soap opera? I'd better watch out or next time I leave the house I'll learn that Sam marries Carly but Sam is pregnant with my kid and Spencer is in some kind of coma while Gibby seeks revenge on me for kissing Carly. Or at least that is how soap operas go. Though I'd never expect to be so lucky.

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><p><strong>AN -** Not the best chapter in way of interesting things happening but important none-the-less. Read and review, my lovelies!


	23. iAm Sick

A/N – Way, an update that's on time for once! Bow down before my might! XD Also, a clarifying note, the iCarlys are between 15 and 16 years old so Freddie no longer has the squeaky voice he did in the first season.

Disclaimer: I don't own.

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><p>At first I was staying home because I didn't have a good reason to leave but soon I saw staying home with terrible stomach cramps. My mom hovered around me with a bottle of Benadryl and a wet washcloth. She seemed afraid to go to work because I might die while she was gone or something. I practically begged her to leave and eventually she did.<p>

I had hoped that once she left, I could take a nap but I was too uncomfortable. Between the pain in my gut and the thoughts in my head, I was awake still an hour after she finally went to work. Finally I sat up, ignoring the pain and crossed into the living room where I turned on the television set.

Then my phone on that sat on the table started vibrating and slid right off onto the floor. I picked it up and flipped it open to see a blond looking back at me. In the picture her hand covered half the shot but I got one of her blue eyes narrowed at me in anger. I thought she looked pretty in her own way.

"Hey." I said in a low voice because a wave of nausea passed over me.

"Hey." She asked. "I haven't seen you in a few days. How have you been?"

I thought about what to say and what it might mean that she was even concerned enough to call. Then I figured that maybe this was more of her needing something from me than wanting to just talk to me. I imagined her calling to say that she had another date or something and felt my stomach drop.

"Sick." I croaked.

"Like a cold… or like food poisoning?" Sam asked, her voice soft with concern. I instantly felt despair was over me—this wasn't my Sam. This was the Sam who wanted to be nothing more than to be just "friends".

"Like someone dropped a cherry bomb down my throat." I told her bitterly.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Sam said as was customary.

"You have no idea…" I grumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing." I said quickly, turning the TV off. "What do you want?"

Sam paused for a moment and I felt the silence between us like another person on the line with us. She probably had no idea what to say but I hoped it was along the lines of that she realized she had feelings for me and wanted to go out. I was being a bit unreasonable and I knew it.

"Just to see if you were alright," Sam told me. "You know, I talked to Carly for you."

"For me?" I didn't need Sam to do anything _for me_.

"Yeah… if I didn't talk to her she would have shown up at your apartment to blame you for Gibby breaking up with her." Sam told me as if I should hugging and thanking her. Like I could take on Carly—I mean, she brought it upon herself anyway. She must think low of me to think I wouldn't tell Gibby.

"Oh, Gibby did end it…"

"Of course, he did, Freddie." Sam told me abruptly. "Gibby may be Gibby but he has standards."

"I didn't mean it like that—"

"I don't care how you meant it, Freddie." She kept saying my name—not some convoluted variation of it—as if trying to commit it to memory. "I'm coming over there to watch over you."

"I'm not going to drop dead."  
>"Not unless it's by my doing, Benson." And she hung up with me staring at the receiver in confusion. That last sentence was so unlike this new Sam and so like the one that kissed me under the tree at the park when I was on my date with Shannon and like the one that laughed at me checking out our waitress. It was weird to miss someone who hadn't gone anywhere.<p>

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><p>Sam was at my house in under then minutes making me assume that she was already on her way over when she called. Just like at the Groovy Smoothie two days before, she was dressed girlier than usual. She was wearing a pair of dark jeans with pink flowers embroidered up the leg. Her hair was pulled up in a messy bun and loose strand fell over her top, which was a light pink halter-top.<p>

"Hey," I said groggily, going to sit on the couch and rest my head against the back but Sam gathered me up in a hug before I could. "Um…. If you keep hugging me like that you'll make me throw up."  
>She jumped back as if I had bit her and looked down at her feet. I felt bad but this is not Sam Puckett. I wished she hadn't come over now as she returned her gaze to me and smiled brightly. "Are you hungry?" She asked me.<p>

"Didn't you hear my clever cherry bomb analogy?" I snapped, suddenly irritated. "I don't want any food."

"Oh." Sam said quietly. "Well, I'm making myself a grilled cheese."

Well, some things never chance and apparently neither did Sam's insatiable hunger. I turned the television back on and wondered how many hours I would spend sitting on that accursed couch. It wouldn't be that much if my stomach decided to cooperate instead of turning against me like it decided to yesterday morning and this morning after breakfast.

Ten minutes later Sam came out of the kitchen with two plates of grilled cheese. She set one in front of me and took her own to sit on the chair opposite me. "I said I wasn't hungry." I protested.

"Some food will do you good." Sam said, the menace clear in her voice. I frowned but started eating the sandwich.

It was almost immediate the pain in my stomach. I ran out of the room and into the bathroom. Sam came in while I was retching up my guts. She placed a hand on my back just like she did at the restaurant. "Happy now?" I snapped.

"Yes." Sam said smugly. I looked up at her. "You're lactose intolerant." She stated it as a fact and not a guess.

"What?" I gaped at her.

"The cheesecake at the restaurant." Sam offered, ticking off on her fingers what I had eaten. "The glass of milk you always have at breakfast and the cheese in the sandwich."

"Are you sure?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Go to the doctor and get back to me." She said, walking out. A moment later I heard the front door slam shut. She wasn't mad… that was just her way of closing doors. I frowned as I stood up and wiped my mouth. That girl was a mystery.

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><p>"Hey, Sam." I said into the phone irritably.<p>

"What's up, Freddie?" She asked pleasantly and in the background I heard a giggle—Gina. I frowned but said nothing.

I looked down at the packed of _Dairy Relief._ "You were right."

"Told you so, Benson." I smiled before replacing the phone on the receiver.

I paused and looked around the kitchen and then back at the pills. Then I picked the phone back up and looked at the piece of paper that I got Gibby to give me when I ran into him at the store. I dialed the number and held my breath as it rang.

"Hello?" A sweet voice asked.

"Hi, is this Shannon?" I asked with trepidation.

"Yes, who is this?"

"Freddie." I said and I heard her sharply intake breath. "Before you hang up, hear me out. I got sick at the restaurant and I walked home. Sam said she told you guys I was leaving but she didn't. I didn't ditch you, I swear."

"Well, it took you long enough to call me and explain." She said but her voice wasn't as angry as her words implied.

"Yeah, well, I didn't have your number and I was sick." I rubbed the back of my neck hesitantly.

"What was wrong?" She asked, concerned.

"It turns out I'm lactose intolerant," I said.

"Oh… that's terrible." She said with sympathy. It was nice to hear someone who was being genuine. Yes, Sam being genuine meant she was a bitch, but I preferred that to the _fake_ Sam. "Are you better now?"

"Yeah, I went to the doctor." I paused. "Hey, Shannon, speaking about being better, how about you and me go on another day but this time better?" I said smoothly and was surprised when I didn't trip up on my words. I asked out a girl without messing up—the first time was in French and the girl didn't even know what I said.

"Sure, and this time we won't go The Cheesecake Warehouse."  
>"How about a nice movie and a hot dog?"<p>

"Pick me up at eight."

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><p><strong>AN – **I hope this clears things up. :D Next time on iFreddie Benson, Freddie goes on his date with Shannon but what will happen when he finds out that she is a vampire werewolf from Mars and Gibby vies for his heart with a fancy dance number in the middle of the restaurant? Nothing, because that story is too awesome to exist… sorry. :P


	24. iTry to Go On A Date

**A/N** - Guys, I am so sorry about Tuesday! I completely missed the update. I could sit here a d tell you that I didn't know what day it was or make up some excuse but to be honest I didn't feel like writing a new chapter. Don't worry your pretty little heads though, I am not running out of steam yet when it comes to this story. :)

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><p>Sam always has to ruin everything.<p>

As I was getting ready for my date, I heard a knock at my door. Adjusting the collar on my gray shirt, I crossed to the front door and swung it open. I paused, mouth agape to see Sam standing there, looking more disheveled than that day after when she spent the night on the curb.

Her hair was a tangled mat as if she had been sleeping all day. I highly doubted that considering that four hours ago she was hanging with Gina. Maybe since then she took a nap? I wasn't sure but her glazed-over eyes didn't point to sleep.

"Have you been drinking?" I asked finally, catching a whiff of the stench on her. So what? She got drunk and showed up at my apartment. Where was Gina?

"No." _Bullshit._

"Come in here," I ordered softly and she stumbled into the apartment before flopping onto the couch. She swung her feet up onto the ornamental pillow. "Feet off the couch." I warned her but she simply bared her teeth at me.

Sighing, I pulled off her converse. I noticed that the soles were caked with still moist mud. I wonder where she's been. It's Seattle! There isn't exactly a lot of mud around here nor has there been any rain in days. I sniff her sneaker but all I smell is the alcohol.

"What happened?" I began.

"Where are you going?" She asks loudly and brusquely. I'm glad my mom's at work already; she'd surely have a heart attack if she saw Sam.

I wondered what to tell the blond. Would she be mad that I had a date? Then again, she was dating Gina in an attempt to forget me. Why couldn't I do the same? Because Sam was a hypocrite. Of course, this is all speculation but it's also true.

Why did I ever like her? I won't even dare to call it love, because I still love her. Like her? Not so much. Especially not at the moment.

"I have a date." I finally admitted but I don't think she heard me. She was plucking at a button on her jacket, pursing her lips in concentration. It's her think face, and I've seen it a million times. It's almost cute. Almost, though. "Did you hear me?"

"Of course I did, Nub-rag!" She slurs harshly. Sam didn't strike me as a calm drunk really. Angry drunk suited her better. That didn't mean that I wanted her to be that. "Why the hell do you think I'd care? I'm not some pansy!"

"Quiet, Sam." I warned her. I didn't want anyone to overhear, especially Carly. "I didn't say that."

"You implied it," Sam told me. I wasn't listening. I was checking the wall clock. 7:15. I had forty-five minutes, or less, to clean up Sam or figure out what to with her and go to meet Shannon. "Freddie! Freddie! Freddie!"

"What, Sam? What?" I snapped, turning away from the clock. My fingers fumbled at the shirt buttons, finishing what I had started before Sam showed up. When I looked at Sam, she looked so sad. Was it my attitude or was the alcohol finally bringing her into the depressed phase? I really didn't want this at the moment.

I was too nice sometimes.

"I'm tired, Freddie." She paused. "Freddie, I want to sleep." A yawn punctuated her statement. My real name sounded so weird amidst all the Fredderlys, Fredbags and Nubs that Sam dropped into her conversations usually. Her constant overuse of my name was actually rather disconcerting.

It's a split second decision, and a stupid one at that but I crossed to the couch. Wedging my hands under haer, I lifted her up. She was so light, and her blond hair tickled my arm where my sleeve got pushed up. I found her smiling at me like a little kid as I carry her into my room. I tuck her carefully into my bed.

Sam watched me through a veil of hair, one blue eye visible as it followed my movement. I brought her some water since the reason behind hangovers was dehydration. I think I saw her give me a soft smile. It could have been a trick of the light even though I kept the lights off.

"I could have walked myself," She says as I lean over her to open the window. It is too warm in my room, and now the sound of the city floods in. I have the desire to stay. Not with Sam par say but just in my room, in that moment.

"You like being carried," I deadpanned, tucking the comforter around her chin. She continued to blatantly watch me. It wasn't a lie. I find myself smiling, and suddenly I find her smiling as well.

I found her lips against mine. It's not hungry like usual but soft, as if someone taught Sam the definition of the word finally. Her hair was soft too, and so was her skin. My fingers brushed her neck as I cupped her chin. There's no tongue, just Sam's wide eyes staring at mine. Who kisses with their eyes wide open?

I like it, I think.

"I have to go." I tell her as she nestled deep in her blankets. She looked so peaceful, and I find myself feeling so as well. For a moment, a brief moment, I think about calling off my date with Shannon. But in the morning I'll know Sam will still hate me. And, no, I'm not implying I want to sleep with her.

"Freddie..." I stop in the doorway and look back. It's that cliché moment in movies when I have to make the decision to leave or stay, and Sam's words will influence my choice—I wasn't joking when I said my life was becoming a soap opera. "I love you."

* * *

><p>The door swung open, and there she stood. She looked prettier than on our first date, but don't think that means that she wasn't pretty all the time. It's just that she abandoned wearing makeup this time around, and she dressed more casually in a purple sweater and long black skirt.<p>

"Right on time," She smirks, scooping up her purse and stepping out on the porch with me. She links her arm with mine and we start walking. "Always a gentleman except when you get sick." She laughs and I do too but my heart's not in it.

She doesn't notice and launches into a discussion of computer RAM. I'm thinking about Sam though. When she talked, she slurred her words and sounded groggy. Even when she said Freddie as I left, she sounded drunk. Yet as she said those last three words, she spoke with clarity and her usual tone, as if for that moment she wasn't drunk anymore.

Maybe I was dwelling on it too much. Maybe? Of course I am. I am going on a date with a pretty, funny girl and I'm thinking about the drunk lesbian sleeping in my bed. Something was wrong with this picture.

"I know, right?" I interjected into the conversation and Shannon smiled. I think she noticed for a moment that my mind was elsewhere. I promised to her, and myself silently, that I would focus on her. "Well, here we are."

The theater wasn't crowded and Shannon never removed her arm from mine. As we made our way to the back of the theater, she never released my arm. I wanted to pull away but only because my elbow was getting stiff. Smiling faintly, I pulled away from her. I don't think she noticed.

"Our hotdogs," I said suddenly, pressing my face into my hands for a second. "We forgot them." I stood.

"Oh don't worry about it, Freddie." Shannon said, grabbing my sleeve gently.

"Yeah but I promised you a hot dog." I told her.

"Yeah but I'm a vegetarian." Well, no wonder Sam didn't like her. For a moment, my thoughts strayed.

"How about some popcorn?" I offered and when she nodded, I was off. The line at the popcorn stand was long but I let it drag it. I wanted these few minutes to daydream so it was out of my system. I thought about the curve of Sam's neck, and the scars on her elbows from falling, and the way hers eyes subconsciously crinkled at the corner when she's lying.

I like Shannon, you see, but I don't love her. I love Sam, but I don't like her. With Sam, once I was over my crush, it was over with and gone. With Shannon, our relationship could grow. As I got the popcorn, I was ready to go back to her.

"You took your sweet time," Shannon hissed as I returned but she was smiling. The movie started: Transformers 2. Not a movie I thought Shannon would want to see but she was full of surprises. "Thanks."

After that we fell into silence. The movie was all explosions and shouts. I kind of liked it even though I usually enjoyed sci-fi more than action movies. One could argue that Transformers was science fiction but it had no science, only fighting.

Suddenly the door to the theater slammed open. Light from the hallway flooded in. I looked and so did Shannon. Everyone in the theater did. I immediately recognized the girl. And she saw me.

I gritted my teeth as the door fell shut again but with her inside. Everyone looked back to the movie but I could see her dark silhouette moving towards us.

"Freddie," Sam called and a collective _Shhh_ went up. Sam cringed. It probably reminds her too much of school. She didn't stop stumbling up the steps. When she reached our row, she simply shoved past the other moviegoers. They grumbled and shouted as she neared us. Finally she flopped down next to me. "Freddie, we need to talk." She didn't even check her volume.

"Now?" I whispered.

"Yes, we need to talk."

"I heard you the first time," I groaned.

"Freddie, is she drunk?" Shannon asked, her face pinched with annoyance. I wondered if it was at Sam's interruption or at her alcohol consumption. Either way, her expression bothered me. I guess I just expected more sympathy.

"What do you think, whore?" Sam hiccupped and I gaped at her. I couldn't believe she just said that. She obviously drank even more since I put her to bed. I wondered where she was getting the booze. "I'm here because Freddie just left me in his bed, all alone.

"Sam!" I yelped. "We should leave. Get you home." Shannon looked sour but didn't disagree.

"I agree." The usher stood at the end of our newly vacated row. He flitted the flashlight at us. "Don't make me kick you three out... Or call the police." He warned, his eyes flickering to Sam. I put my hand in her shoulder protectively and guided her out of the theater.

"Another date ruined by the infamous Sam Puckett," I heard Shannon hiss to herself as we went back to my apartment. I said nothing.

* * *

><p>I put Sam back in my bed.<p>

When we reached the lobby, Sam refused to walk any further. I went to pick her up, but Shannon beat me to it. It seems that she is pretty strong herself. When I commented, she mentioned how light Sam was. That worried me a bit, to be honest.

Shannon hovered around me. It was rather irritating. It was just as bad as her not even trusting me to carry Sam into the elevator. I guess she shouldn't exactly trust me but I haven't done anything to not deserve it yet.

Ignoring Shannon's presence, I rubbed Sam's head, getting my fingers tangled all up in her light-colored curls until she was asleep. She mumbled something as she fell asleep. I think was "I love you" but muffled.

Convinced that she was asleep this time, I walked into the living room with Shannon. The brunette looked sad almost and I knew I messed up something, or maybe Sam did but something was definitely wrong.

"What going on between you two?" She asked finally.

"Nothing." I told her, but the rethought it. "Actually I don't know."

"Do you like her?" I say across from her on the couch. She tucked her legs underneath herself. Her feet were so dainty.

"No." I told her honestly. My answer would have changed if she said love.

"Have you kissed her?" Shannon asked the inevitable and my stomach clenched. She must have seen my face because she asked, "When was the last time?"

I paused. Did I lie? No. Last time that didn't work out for any parties involved. "7:30." I told her.

Shannon looked grim but said nothing. She scooted until she was nest to me. Her arm brushed my arm. Her hand replaced her arm as if holding me down to keep me from floating away. Then her lips brushed my neck... my chin... my cheek. And then her lips were on mine.

"I'll see you next week. Friday at eight. There's this cute little sushi place on West Avenue." I had my eyes closed still from the kissing. I opened them to see Shannon standing by the front door, her purse draped over her shoulder. "Night, Freddie."

Then she was gone.

"What just happened?" I whispered into the silence.

* * *

><p><strong>AN** – Sam drunk? Gasp! Scandal! And that is all I have to say. Night people (even though it's ten in the morning).


	25. iKnow We Kissed

**A/N -** This is the Tuesday update... a little early but enjoy. The next update will be thursday! :P

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><p>My mom came home around three o'clock to find me asleep on the couch. I made up some lie about falling asleep there while watching television, and when I later woke up I turned the tv off but didn't move. Since it was so unlike me to lie to my mom, and for her to find out, she ate it up and sent me to bed.<p>

I had to climb in with Sam and cover her head. When my mom came in later to kiss me goodnight, she had no idea that Sam was right there. I mumbled that I loved her too and wished her to leave. After that she left me alone, and I scrambled to the floor where I slept.

The next morning was Saturday and my mom was off to a conference early. By the time Sam got up, Ms. Benson was long gone. And as Sam woke up, her bare feet found my chest. She literally walked on me. When my eyes first opened it was because Sam's foot was planted on my chest.

"Morning," She grumbled, her hair matted to her head and her eyes sagging shut. I knew that if she weren't hungover, she wouldn't be so nice. I mean, she was already standing on me.

"Sam." I said sternly, grabbing her ankle to get her foot off me. I must have startled her because next thing I knew, Sam was falling. She hit my floor with a thud and went still. "Sam. Sam. Are you alright?"

Sam's shoulders were shaking, her hair hiding her face. She must have been hurt. I was standing over her, leaning down to check if she was okay. Suddenly her head clonked mine and she groaned as her head smacked the floor again. Then her shoulders were shaking with laughter...again.

"You're an idiot." Sam laughed before grabbing the front of my shirt and slamming her lips against mine. I guess that by calling me an idiot, she thought she was telling me that she loved me.

I pushed her away and none too nicely. Her expression as wounded as she sat up, pulling her knees to her chest. "Sam—."

"What happened last night?"

"You got drunk, showed up at my house, kissed me, and then I went on my date with Shannon, you showed up at the theatre and I brought you back here... again." I told her with a grimace. Her face was blank as she studied my face. Maybe she was trying to see if I was lying. "And I'm guessing that you don't remember any of it."

She shook her head slowly.

"You had a date," She deadpans. "I'm so sorry."

"Now you're sorry?" I said, laughing. I couldn't believe it. "You kissed me on my first date!"

She looked at me blankly. "Yeah... sorry."

"What's gotten into you?" I paused. "And what about Gina?"

"We broke up." Sam said in a somewhat sad tone but she didn't look too sad about it. "She told me that I was a manipulative bitch."

"And...?"

"And it made me realize some things." Sam admitted.

"Like that drinking massive amounts of alcohol is a good idea?" I smirked at her. She punched my arm.

"I'm serious, Freddie." She told me sternly. "I can be a real bitch."

I raised my eyebrows at her and laughed.

"Don't laugh, Freddie. You've been a real jerk too." She told me harshly but was still smiling.

"What are we doing Sam?" I asked.

"I'm going to leave you alone. And you... you're going to call Shannon." She told me. "Go on another date."

"I already have another date with her." I interjected. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because do you really think you'll be happy with me?" Sam asked. And I didn't know the answer to that question. I mean, I loved Sam but I didn't exactly like her. Would I enjoy being in a relationship with someone who was so mean and rude and nasty all the time? Or would I rather be with safe and friendly Shannon?

"Sam, I—."

At that moment, some one pounded at the front door. The sound resounded throughout the entire apartment.

I exchanged a look with Sam before rising and heading into the living room. I opened the door and the brunette practically fell into me. It was Carly, and she looked pissed. She was holding her phone in one hand and the other she was using to steady herself against my shoulder.

Somewhere between the time that I went into the living and the moment I opened the door, Sam came to stand behind me. Carly who hadn't said a word yet, looked between Sam and I with a bewildered expression.

"Uh... hey, Carls." Sam waved and nodded at Carly.

"D-don't wave at me, Sam." Carly snapped. "You guys lied to me!" She thrusted her hand out and on the phone I saw a picture. It was of me and Sam, kissing downtown at night. I remembered the sound of a camera that night. Behind us car lights streaked. Sam and I though, were clear as day and Sam's hands, even though she didn't really kiss me back, were hovering right over my waist.

"That isn't us." Sam offered lamely, but it was pretty obvious.

"Carly, it isn't what you think." I told her, no matter how clich the line.

"So it isn't my two best friends seeing each other behind my back?" Carly practically shouted.

"Actually, it's not." Sam told her matter-of-factly.

"Then please enlighten, Sam." Carly practically snarled.

"Well, it's complicated." Sam pleaded, looking to me for help.

I shrugged and told her, "Tell me about it."

"Yes, please tell me about it." Carly said, placing her hands on her hips.

This couldn't end well.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - **Short chapter... well, enjoy this cliffhanger.

**Note:** This is pretty much the equivalent of iThink They Kissed. I skipped iKiss. It just didn't fit in anymore.


	26. iKiss Her Again

**A/N – **Gosh, I got addicted to Pokefarm and had so much trouble writing this. XD Well, here it is. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>Awkward couldn't describe anything well enough. Maybe I should use super awkward or really, really awkward. I still don't think it explains the tension in that room.<p>

On the couch sat Sam and I. Sam, of course, was munching loudly on a bag of chips, earning cold looks from Carly. Carly sat on the living room table, glaring at us on the couch as if we were scum. I looked at my hands to avoid meeting her venomous gaze. Finally she whistled low, drawing our attention.

"So are you going to tell me what happened or are we going to sit here all day listening to Sam eating?"

"Eating?" Sam offered and Carly grumbled. The bag crinkled as Carly confiscated Sam's chips. "Hey!"

"You'll get these back when you tell me why you two lied!" Sam glared at Carly and pouted.

"We didn't lie." Sam snapped.  
>"What do you call sneaking around behind my back and making out in the middle of the street?" Carly screamed and I willed her to be quiet. This was bad enough as it was. I didn't need the entire building to know that I was in love with Sam or that I kissed her.<br>"We weren't making out." Sam protested.

"It's true." I offered. "I kissed her. She didn't kiss me back."

Carly looked at us venomously before deciding that maybe we weren't lying. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Sam looking at me sadly. Was she regretting not kissing me back?

"Okay, so Freddie are you in love with Sam?" Carly asked.

"Well, that's a loaded question." I responded with some inhibition. I saw Sam pull a funny face but I think it was in confusion. I didn't turn my head—I couldn't bring myself to.

"Shouldn't be that hard to answer, Freddie, considering that Sam slept here last night?" Carly said loudly and I shushed her. Her face turned red as she stared at me. "Don't tell me to be quiet, Freddie! Didn't think I'd find out, huh? Shannon showed up at my doorstep last night and told me everything that happened. Sam showed up at your date drunk—and don't think you've escaped a lecture about alcohol, Sam—and you brought her back here to sleep."

"Yes, in my bed." I retorted and Sam snickered.

"HA!" Carly shouted with a crazy expression.

"Yes, Carly, I gave her my bed while I slept on the floor." I deadpanned. Carly's face fell and she looked between us confusedly.

"What is going on with you two?" She asked softly.

Sam and I just started laughing, and once we started we couldn't stop. Sam doubled over and I was draped over the arm trying to stop. It was just so comical. She asked us the one question we were trying to answer before she burst in and interrogated us as if she were the police, and Sam and I were common criminals—well, Sam was.

"What's so funny?" Carly hissed.

I forced myself to stop laughing—it hurt. "Carly, that is the same question that we keep asking."

She looked between Sam and I for a moment. "Freddie, go in your bedroom."

"What?" I gaped. By this time, Sam was staring at Carly too.

"I'm going to talk to you both individually. And if you lie, your stories won't add up." She winked at Sam and I. We exchanged looks. "I'm going to talk to Freddie first."

"You think I'm going to sit here and let you interrogate us? If you go in that room, I'll leave." Sam snarled, looking somewhat panicked. She probably had been interrogated before. I mean, she still ran from the police—even when she's done nothing wrong. This was probably bringing up back memories and her anxieties.

"Bacon, Sam… special bacon." Was all Carly said and Sam sighed resignedly. She crossed her arms and sat further back against the couch. "Now… Freddie?"

* * *

><p>I couldn't believe that I was going through with this. Carly was off her rocker. Yet Sam was complying, but then again she was promised bacon. I was promised nothing.<p>

As soon as I walked into my bedroom, Carly slammed the door behind me.

"You know, we haven't talk in weeks, Freddie."

I looked at her stern expression.

"I know… But this is still my fault. Don't blame Sam for any of this." I blurted out and as soon as the words were out of my mouth, I wondered where they came from.

Carly scrutinized my face for a moment. "You really love her don't you?"

"Who? Shannon? Carly, she's nice and all but we've only had one re—"

"Sam, you dunce!" Carly laughed and smacked my arm. It was so like Sam that I looked at Carly in confusion. "I can't understand why you'd like _her_ though, and not me… at least anymore."  
>I frowned at her. "I might have grown to like you if not for the fact that you were trying to cheat on Gibby with me!" I snarled. "And where did that land you?"<p>

Carly looked like she was going to hit me. Maybe this wasn't the time to mock her, but it felt irritation from all of this. Carly saw one picture—which I wasn't sure how she got—and now she was prying into every aspect of my life.

"You can't blame me, Freddie."

"Uh… yes, I can!" I chirped.

Carly paused. "You still haven't answered my question—"

"Yes, I love Sam." I told her dejectedly. "But I don't like her."

"Huh?" She said, her confusion clear.

"I can't explain why I love her, but I do. I can explain why I don't like her—she is rude, obnoxious and has the worse manners. Carly, she is a criminal most days of the week, and if she lied anymore, she'd be a politician." Okay, parts of that is a lie. Sam does has her redeeming qualities such as she never lies in relationships.

Silence filled the room. "Why did you love Gibby?" I finally asked.

"I didn't," Carly laughed. Then she paused. "I just was in it for the fun."

"That seems kind of wrong unless he's in on it." I pointed out, trying to keep my tone neutral.

Carly just rolled her eyes and turned away from me. Finally she turned around, looking pained. "I'll make you a deal, Freddie."

"A deal?"

"Yes, a deal. Stay with me." Carly looked serious. "If you kiss me—full on kiss me—I'll stop asking questions and let Sam and you continue see each other behind my back—"

"We aren't seeing each other."

"But you love her."

"It's complicated!" I shouted a little louder than I intended. Carly looked startled. "I don't know if a relationship with Sam would be worth it."

"Come on, Freddie. If you just kiss me, you can go back in the living room and figure out your feelings for Sam. Okay?" Carly smiled at me sweetly. It was the smile I had originally liked before I got to know the girl behind it.

"Sure."

I placed my hands on Carly's waist, and her arms draped around my neck. We moved in close. Her lips brushed mine slowly at first but soon the kiss became more rushed. Blood was pounding through my ears and all I heard was a rushing noise. Other than that, the kiss was nothing. In fact, Carly isn't even a good kisser.

I felt Carly's hands trail down my chest. This was going too far but my brain was running slowly. It was like wading through jello. It had nothing to do with the kiss though—like I said, there was no spark. I just felt trapped.

Finally I pulled away. I stepped away from Carly, trying not to look disgusted. I mean, I liked Carly as a friend but there was nothing more there… at all.

Then I saw Sam. She looked horrified.

"Sam—"

"I have to go." Sam said and turned to leave. I groped for her arm but she was gone. The front door slammed loudly. Then there was another slam but I didn't dwell on it.

I looked at Carly who I found smirking. "You find this fu—" I paused, realization dawning on me. "You planned this? Get out."

"Freddie, it's not what you—"

"Think?" I snarled. "At least I think." I told her with a finality that caused her to practically run out of my room. I frowned after her.

I immediately texted Sam asking her to come back.

Two hours later and Sam never responded.

* * *

><p><strong>AN –** What will happen now? I don't know. I'll try to get a chapter up Sunday because Tuesday I go on vacation and I don't back until the 26th. So I will two weeks of updates. Sorry.


	27. iGet the Truth

**A/N -** I honestly tire of this story. There are some chapters I'm especially proud of like _iMeet Sam,_ _iGo To Find Sam, _and _iTry to Go On a Date_, but overall I'm actually unhappy with this. I didn't plan this at all and its gone in a completely different direction than I initially planned. I will finish this story first, of course, but only have three more chapters. I know that doesn't seem like a lot but I really want to wrap this up. Once I'm done with this, I will write a new story, a better one. :) Oh, and I'm going on vacation for the next two weeks so the next chapter should be up sometime in that first week of September.

* * *

><p>It had been three days after the incident before I saw Carly again. I had been coming out of my apartment and she was there, getting ready to knock on my door. I almost knocked her out with the door—at least that way I wouldn't have to talk to her.<p>

But we didn't talk.

We both stood there for a few minutes, looking anywhere but at each other. I wanted to just walk off but her face was so sad. It reminded me of when Sam told me that she wanted to act nicer to be because Gina called her a bitch. It was resignation. And it would be wrong to not let her talk.

"You really love Sam, huh?" Carly finally asked.

I didn't know what to say, so I said, "Yes."

"Three days ago you called it complicated." Carly told me raising an eyebrow.

"Because it is Carly." I paused. "In a lot of ways, I hate Sam. She is rude, obnoxious, crude, and has no manners. She needlessly bullies me and never pays attention at school. She acts tough when we all know it is an act really. Though I can't imagine her acting any other way. And I hate that I love her."

"Then why do you love her?"

"She is difficult—stubborn—and never lets anyone walk on her. She is the most independent person I know but she'll humor you, and let you protect her either way. Her quips, while mean, make me smile and rising up to the challenge is fun. She'll make you stronger by trying to tear you down. " I took a quavering breath before continuing. "She lies so easily and so frequently, it makes life more interesting—she makes life more interesting. And when we kiss, it's like fireworks exploding in my brain."

Carly remained expressionless the entire time I was talking. I kept studying her eyes to see her thoughts, but unlike Sam, she didn't wear her emotions on her sleeve—er, eyes.

"Oh, and she had amazing boobs." I hissed playfully.

"Ew, Freddie, I didn't need to know that!" Carly shrieked, throwing her hands up over her ears and grimacing.  
>"You asked." I told her, nudging her with my elbow, and she smirked at me. When she took her hands down, I said, "And they're so perky even without her bra and—"<p>

She was covering her ears again. I just smirked and kept quiet until she removed her hands again. "Like you've ever seen her topless."

There seemed no point in lying to Carly, even though she had some skewed morals. "I have actually."

"What?" Carly snapped. "Did you two sleep together?"

"No, of course not." I laughed. "After that guy attacked her, I brought her back to my apartment and gave her a bath. Nothing inappropriate there."

I smiled remembering that bath, but actually I didn't really look at her chest. I was looking at her content smile, and for a few moments, it was like she was my girl. I really enjoyed doing things for her. It gave me a peek into what could be if we could just get this all figured out.

"What guy? What attack?" Carly gaped.

"Well, we were walking when Sam ran off. This guy grabbed her and we fought him off." I looked at Carly's expression. "Did Sam not tell you?"

That's when Carly burst into tears. There was no watering eyes or increased breathing—no, it was instantaneous with no warning. I looked at her with confusion for a moment, before grabbing her arm and guiding her into my apartment. There was a box of tissues on the table near the couch. I sat her down, and passed her the box.

"What's wrong?"

"See, Freddie." She wailed. "It's already s-starting. I knew if you two got together that I'd be c-cut of the equation. And I'd lose my b-best friends. I just k-knew it." She rubbed at her eyes, smearing her mascara. I placed a hand on her arm.

"Cut out?" I paused. "Is that what this is all about? You're afraid of losing Sam and I?"

"Duh." She hissed, pulling away from me. "You two are my b-best friends and I've known for a long time that you have been in love. And I just—"

"In love? How long have you thought that?" I asked with confusion.

"For almost as long as you two have known each other, but I never said anything. But then you dated Valerie and now Shannon so I thought maybe I was wrong. Then I saw that picture."

By this time Carly stopped crying and was only hiccupping. "Where did you get the picture from?"

"Chain text message." She told me. Then she saw my face. "Don't worry it only had a few other recipients and none were from our school. I didn't send it on either."  
>I went in the kitchen and brought Carly some water.<p>

"Did you kissing me while you were dating Gibby have anything to do with it?"

Carly hung her head. "Yes." She looked at me sadly. "Sam _hates_ cheaters so I thought if she caught you with me, she would hate you for doing it all."

"That would have hurt you too, Carls." I told her, trying not to roll my eyes.

"Yeah, but at least I wouldn't have to watch you two being happy from the sidelines."

I realized that she wasn't anything but scared. And I was scared too. Fear, and love—if they weren't considered the same thing—made people do crazy things. And in a way, her actions were out of love too. She loved Sam and I too much to let us just cut her out of our lives forever, which would never happen.

"Wait, were you telling the truth about cheating on all those other guys?"

"Well, I did cheat on Tyler but I swear that I didn't know he had a twin brother." Carly said defensively. "I didn't cheat on anyone purposely except Gibby."

"Didn't you know that Gibby would find out? And why did you think I'd even go for it?" I asked quietly, taking her hand in mine. She seemed to be comfortable by the simple touch.

"I didn't know. I didn't think—you were right about that, at least." She sighed, leaning her head against me. "I guess, I figured that I'd rather lose Gibby than either you or Sam."

I sat in thought. Would Sam and I push her out of our little group? I didn't want to think we would but the sly glances we shared and the constant rendezvous we used to have, could count as exclusion. I didn't want to do that to Carly. And I knew Sam, if she ever forgave us, would feel the same way. Speaking of Sam…

"Freddie?" She said to get my attention.

"I get it, Carly. I'm going to talk to Sam." I told her, rising from the couch and opening the door for Carly to leave. She smiled and rose, heading into the hall.

"Thanks, Freddie, for understanding." She enveloped me in a hug, and I hugged her back. "I promise never to kiss you again."

I smirked against her hair. "Thank you."

* * *

><p>I walked out of the apartment, heading towards the elevator so I could down to visit Sam. As I passed the fire escape though, I saw her head of blond curls. I paused and looked out. She was sitting at the edge with her legs dangling down. For once, she wasn't doing something mischievous out there.<p>

"Hey," I said, sliding open the window and stepping out there with her. I didn't sit, waiting for an invitation or acknowledgement at least.

Sam turned, startled. Then she frowned. "Oh, it's you."

"Yeah, it's me." I smiled lightly, and joined her. She scooted away from me. "What's the matter?"

"Shouldn't you be off, making out with little miss perfect?" I stared at her for a minute before I realized she was talking about Carly.

"Um… no. I was actually here to talk about that, Sam." I stopped to collect my thoughts. "Carly told me that if I kissed her, she'd leave you and I alone. I just wanted to not be interrogated. I learned that she did it with the soul intention of you seeing."

I looked at Sam but she didn't seem convinced but angry seemed to be her default expression. I sighed.

"Carly is afraid that if we date, we will forget all about her." Sam looked at me, blinking. "I told her not to fear that."

Sam looked resigned. "Because we will never date."

"No." She perked up and looked at me with her eyes narrowed. "Because she is our best friend, and she may make mistakes but we'll always love her. Plus, I figure she'll get another boyfriend soon and forget all about us."

"Are you saying what I think you are?" Sam asked, her tone suspicious.

"What do you think I'm saying?" I asked, not wanting to say something stupid.

"Nothing." She said quickly. I opened my mouth to ask but she asked, "Freddie, Carly cut you off while we were talking. What were you going to say?"

"I don't know." Told her.

"What? How could you not—" Sam started in.

"Sam… Sam, I was going to say that 'I don't know.'"

Recognition flicked across her face and she nodded. Then her brow furrowed. "Damn it, Freddie." Her anger flaring again. "You have to decide eventually. You can't have your cake and eat it too."

I smirked at her. "Are you the cake?"

Her cheeks turn red. "FREDDIE!" She snapped incredulously. "I'm serious."

I didn't really have an answer for her. I loved her… a lot. I mean, a lot a lot. I dreamt of her. I thought of her no matter what I was doing. When we brushed in the hall, I wanted to grab her and kiss her. And when we kissed, I wanted to kiss her forever. Those days where we did nothing but kiss, I loved it. And I loved it even more just to be with her. She was witty and shockingly (at times) nice and fun. I loved her… but being with her would be difficult.

"Sam, you have to give me time."

"Freddork, I'm not giving you any more time." She snapped, stabbing my chest.

"Sam, do you even like me?" I asked quietly. She kept telling me to decide but I wasn't sure what it was that I was deciding. To let her go? Or to date her? Or what?

Sam looked at me a long minute, her expression shocked. "Yeah, Fredderly, you're a good friend." She socked me in the arm.

"You know what I mean."

"Answer my question first." Sam snapped.

"Answer mine first." I pleaded.

"You know what, Benson." Sam jumped up. "Forget it! You're impossible. You can't just make up your mind. And I think I'm in love with you but you probably don't feel that way for me. I can't even be sure because you won't tell me and you keep dating all these other people. I want to be the girl you want but I don't know who she is or I'd—"

I stood and pressed my lips to hers. It wasn't a rough kiss. Instead I cupped her chin with my hand and guided her lips to mine. She gasped against my mouth. It wasn't a peck or a make-out like our usual kisses. This was something else. I left her lips and placed a kiss on her shoulder where her shirt hung lower, and then I pressed my mouth against her neck.

Sam moaned and leaned into me, gripping my shirt in her fists. Our lips met again, just as soft and gentle as before. I pulled away from her but rested my forehead to hers. I found her blue eyes searching mine as we stood their, breathing heavily.

"You mean that?" Sam asked gently.

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><p><strong>AN - **What does Freddie mean? I don't know. :p I guess I'll just have to read the next chapter.

Review plz!


	28. iLove her

**A/N - **Crappy chapter is crappy. Sorry about this ending guys. I hope this is good enough. I've already started in on the other story so I'd really like to wrap this one up now before I leave for vacation in 30 minutes. XD So please don't hate me.

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><p>We said nothing.<p>

When she asked me if I meant that, I nodded and kissed her again. Then we sat at the edge of the fire escape. She laid her head on my shoulder. I stroked my hand through her soft hair, and watched her content face. A small smirk was plastered on her face as if she just played a great prank but I knew she was silently laughing at herself.

She said she'd never love me.

She pushed me away.

She pulled me close.

And now here we were. The irony of it was amusing in ways one can't imagine.

We could imagine it. Our life was just one big ironic statement. At least it was a joke. That would be horrible. But the thought made me smirk, and a small laugh escaped my lips. Immediately Sam turned to me. "What are you laughing about, Benson?"

"How ironic this is." I told her and she scowled at me. Turning away again, she focused her eyes somewhere in the distance. She didn't have to question—we both knew it was ironic and why. There was no doubting any of it. "Hey, Sam? How long have you loved me?"

She looked thoughtful for a moment, and then said, "Remember when I first met you?"

"Wait… you liked me for that long?" I gasped in confusion. I loved her for a long time but not that long. I loved her since the incident with the hammer fan that Spencer made. I never admitted it to myself until I punched Sam. Funny how the dumbest decision can give rise to much better ones.

"How long have you liked me?" She asked quietly, looking nervous as though she said something wrong.

I pulled her closer, tucking her under my arm. "Since five minutes go." She struggled against me, almost pitching herself off the fire escape. "Sam… Sam. I'm kidding. I've like you since I've met you but fell in love with you that day I found you after I punched you."

"Yeah, Freddork, that's so romantic." She said sardonically but I only smile and kiss her. She's my Sam. The rude, mean, crude, sarcastic, crazy, delinquent girl that I've slowly fallen in love with. "But sweet. Why though?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you realize that you…in that moment…um, liked me?" She stammered, carefully avoiding the word _love_. I ignored it.

"Oh, I'm all for a damsel in distress." I smirked, waiting for it. She punched me hard in the arm—hard enough to leave a bruise. I started laughing and her angry expression turn to confusion.

"For your information, I wasn't in distress nor was I ever a damsel."

"Did you smell yourself, Sam?" I paused. "You weren't the damsel in distress. Everyone else was."

"Shut up." Sam yelped but is smiling. I lean down and kiss her head. "But really, Benson. You're not telling me that you fell in…because I smelled badly."

"Of course. I knew that with you smelling like that, that I would never have any competition." I laughed and Sam shot me a deadly look. "Okay, okay. I don't know. I guess, it was because even looking like hell, you were still the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. And in those moments, you were open with me for once and I saw a glimpse of what we could have."

"Lame." She hisses but she's grinning.

"You asked." I told her matter-of-factly.

Silence fell over the two of us as we sat there, watching the sun dip behind the clouds in the distance.

Sam finally asked, "Is your mom home?"

I looked at her in surprise. "Uh… no, she works late tonight until 2. Why?"

"It's getting chilly out here." Sam tells me, taking my hand and dragging me back through the hall to my apartment.

Inside she first raided the fridge, stealing the pack of ham that I got just for her. I was afraid it might be bad but she scarfed it down before I could say anything. I didn't stop her because it must be fine then.

"Can you stop eating for a minute?" I laughed and she snarled as me. That caused me to laugh even more.

"What would you rather do?" She asked, dropping the empty packet in the trash. Before I could answer, she had crossed the kitchen and gave me a small kiss. "Let me answer that for you."

Next thing I knew, she had pulled me into my bedroom and shut the door behind her. I looked at her with confusion but she dashed any and all of my questions with the kiss she gave me. It was hungry and rough. In her hands she gripped my hair, drawing me closer.

"Sam…" I hissed.

We broke apart for a moment, watching one another.

"What?"

"What's going on?" I asked.

She shrugged before grabbing my shirt again, drawing me to her. She pulled my head down to meet my lips again. I met her with the same ferocity. I felt her pushing against my chest and let her push me all the way to the bed. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her drop her phone on the dresser.

At that point, I scooped her up and dumped her onto the covers. I hovered over her, giving her a chance to say no, before kissing her. I didn't plan to go any farther than this kissing though.

But Sam seemed to have other ideas.

She flipped up over, straddling my face and kissing me again. She pressed her hands against my chest and looked at me a long moment before kissing me again. Then she did something I didn't expect. She slipped out of her shirt. I reached out and stilled her hand as she reached behind her to unclamp her bra.

"Sam…"

"Freddie." She smirked, mocking me.

"Do you want this?" I asked slowly.

Her smirk grew to a wide grin and she leaned down to kiss me again. I rested my hands on her soft lower back. "Yes." She breathed in my ear and my face turned red.

I kissed her again, smiling against her lips.

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><p>I woke up to a beeping, loud and needy. My clock read that it was one-thirty. I frowned trying to remember what happened. I noticed a wait on my arm and looked down to see a head of blond hair on my chest. Sam was curled against my side, half of her body resting on my arm.<p>

I reached out and shook her lightly, trying to wake her. "Shut up, Fredbag!" She hissed, placing her hands on my chest and pushing away from me. She flipped over and scooted to the other side of the bed. I said nothing.

I shook my head and rose, finding that the beating was her cell phone. Then I realized my mom was going to be home in a half an hour. I wasn't ready to wake Sam yet—she looked so peaceful. Brushing back her hair, I placed a kiss on her forehead. Then I scavenged for my clothes.

That's when I heard it.

It was faint and in the distance. It was knocking. Throwing the blanket over Sam's body, I hurried out to greet whoever it was. It was Carly.

"Hey." I said with a smile.

"Sam never came home last night." She tells me suspiciously.

"Well, about that—" I begin.

Just then Sam pops out of the apartment. I glance at her and see that she is wearing nothing but one of my extra large shirts. I place my head in my hands. When I look up though, Carly has her arm around Sam but is smiling at me.

"I see." Carly laughs. "You weren't going to lie, were you?"

"You would have found out eventually." I shrugged.

"Well, I'll put her to bed on the couch so Spencer doesn't get suspicious and your mom doesn't find out." Carly offers, disappearing into the apartment with Sam. "Say night, Sam."

Sam nods lazily and I smile. "Goodnight." I say after them before heading back into my apartment. I didn't think I would fall asleep again.

I did.

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><p>The next morning, we had school. And I was almost dreading it. I wasn't going to hide these new developments with Sam—I mean our relationship… not what happened last night. I blushed when I thought about it. Afterwards, before Sam feel asleep, she had said, "Night, boyfriend."<p>

I had replied, "Night, girlfriend. I hate you."

"Yeah, yeah, Benson." She had snapped but she smiled still.

This morning when I first saw Sam she was standing at her locker. She was wearing a form-fitting red short and jeans. Black boots reached her knees. I always thought she was beautiful but she just as beautiful in this moment as any other. Now it was different though because I could call her mine. And that was what she was—she was my girlfriend. I smiled like a dork as I walked up to her.

"Morning." I said softly in her ear, gripping her waist from behind.

The pain was excruciating. As soon as I touched her, her elbow came back into my groin. I yelped and fell to the ground. I felt eyes on us but I guessed that no one thought any thing strange about the scene.

"Damn it, Sam." I groaned while she glared down at me. "Why did you do that?"

"Don't touch me, Benson." Sam snarls, walking away from me.

"Wait, Sam." I grab her arm. She turns to glare at me. "Did something happen? Did I do something wrong?"

"_Did I do something wrong_?" She mocked. "You're Fredwart Benson… of course you did something wrong."

With that she turned on her heel and stomped away. I frowned after her. It felt like my heart was breaking. Then I caught her eye when she reached the end of the hall. She gave me a half smile before walking away.

That. Little. Bitch. I smiled to myself before deciding how to get her back.

I waited until lunch before I did it. The entire school was there, eating their lunches, when I burst into the cafeteria. Everyone looked up as the door slammed behind me. Keeping my face expressionless, I stomped to where Sam was chatting with Carly.

I snatched her arm and spun her towards me before slamming my lips into hers. Around us the cafeteria fell silent. We stayed like that for a few moments before we broke apart. The cafeteria broke into cheers, and I turned red.

Keeping my eyes on Sam, I saw her anger. She was mad at me. Then she smirked. "I deserved that."

"I know." I joked and she flicked me. I grimaced.

"Freddie…" I smiled at her. "I hate you."

"I hate you too.

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><p><strong>AN - **And that's the end. Terrible huh? Hope you enjoyed. I will have my new story started after August 30th, promise. And it will be better. :)


	29. Epilogue

**A/N - **Okay this is officially the last chapter. Just to wrap things up.

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><p>People say that opposites but I never believed them. I knew my opposite was Sam Puckett with her terrible ways. I said that I would never find myself attracted to her. I also said I'd never sleep with a girl like her or marry some one like her. Well, there is one thing I didn't do. I never married Sam.<p>

I actually married Angela Carson—er, Angela Benson. She was a pretty red head that I met in college. She was nothing like Sam though but she was so sweet. After we dated for eight years, I proposed and she laughed in my face. I was heartbroken until through her laughter she said, "Yes".

A year and a half later, we were married.

Sam came to the wedding with her boyfriend, Andrew. He was a nice guy and an insurance broker. We were all convinced that she would marry him but she called him boring and the fight escalated from there. I just wished she hadn't had the fight at the reception.

I comforted her and so did Carly.

Carly was married too, you know. She was married a year before I was, but there was no wedding. We all thought Sam would elope before Carly would but she got drunk and went to Vegas with her long-time boyfriend Griffin. They stayed together and Carly was already pregnant—with twins, they said.

After they were born—Kelley and Jesse—Angela pressured me to have kids too. I wanted kids so I agreed.

Jillian Alexandra Benson was born July 25th, 2021. She has Angela's beautiful hair and my eyes. She was mischievous though. She got into everything. Before she turned eight, she knew every cop in Seattle, having not only run off six or seven times to explore but for spitting in a police officer's face.

At the same time she was born, I was working as a regional manager of Pear. I was actually working with a few guys from work to break off to run our own company, Tobi. It was named after my friend, Arty's dog. It was like Pear but better. But that's a little conceited, huh?

Then the worst thing happened a year before Jill was supposed to go into kindergarten. I was home with her when the phone rang. There had been a car accident.

And in the worst possible way, I was single.

I took Jillian and left Seattle. I wanted to forget everything about that city. I didn't tell Spencer who was still single and an artist, or Carly and her happy little family, or Sam and her many different boyfriends where I was going. I ended up in Salt Lake City, Utah.

I had quit Pear, and Tobi, which had launched already. But I needed to start over.

A few years later when Jill was fifth grade, she got an all A+ report card. I told her I would take her out to wherever she wanted for dinner. She picked this place called The Meat Shack. It was a fairly new place and got great reviews.

When we went, Jillian loved it—my little carnivore.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw familiar blond hair, but when I looked, I saw no one I know. I frowned and went back to listening to my daughter describe giving a boy a wedgie at school.

"You better watch that boy, Benson. She'll fall in love with him someday." The voice made me jump and I turned to stare into the bluest eyes I had ever seen. I felt like crying. "We should really catch up."

After that, Sam and I dated again. It was great. Everything was great. Jillian loved Sam just as much as I did. I knew Sam loved Jillian even though she constantly claimed that she hated little children. Soon though, Jill was too old be a child anymore.

And Sam was right. My daughter started dating Mark Esposito in the beginning of their senior year—the boy she tormented daily for the past ten years. Sam just laughed when she heard.

But I never married Sam—that was no lie. And that meat restaurant? She owned it so I started working there. Shortly after that, Jillian came to work there as a sous chef and it turned into a family business though Sam and I weren't married.

I didn't need a ring or a paper to say that I was in love with Sam Puckett. Plus, if I married her, I couldn't call her "Puckett" anymore. The thought saddened me.

Don't think I forgot about my wife. I still thought about her but I knew she'd want me to be happy, and with Sam I was, even though she was still the rude, crude and socially unacceptable girl I always knew. She was still insecure and violent. We fought all the time but it always ended with us laughing or kissing, and I never minded.

My life didn't play out the way I planned but it all worked out in the end.

Oh, and did I mention that Sam's pregnant? She's mad at me about it. I know she's really happy though.

We're going to name him Christopher William Benson.

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><p><strong>AN - **The end! I think this makes up for the last chapter. :P


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